


Roses and Thorns

by theangryuniverse



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Historical, Concubine, F/M, Fluff, Genji Monogatari, Heian Period, Polygamy, Second Wife - Freeform, inspired by genji monogatari, ish, secondary wife
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2019-02-16
Packaged: 2019-05-29 14:20:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 19
Words: 65,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15074984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theangryuniverse/pseuds/theangryuniverse
Summary: As a slave girl given to the Emperor of the West, she certainly did not expect to be shown compassion from a daiyokai. But as she receives a new name and the chance for a new life in dignity, a girl named Rin becomes the secondary wife of the one that everyone fears. Will she be able to stir compassion in the heart of the one that claims to have a heart of stone?





	1. A Present for His Majesty

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MissMarquin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissMarquin/gifts).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to my new story!  
> This story has been losely inspired by the first novel in history, The Tale of Genji (or: Genji Monogatari). In this story, the romance between Rin and Sesshomaru will develop slowly. I hope you like it!
> 
> Warning: there will be polygamy in this story, following the conventions of Feudal Japan.

It was a night of sheer magnificence unseen before, a feast for the senses and the spirit, too, as the wine was flowing endlessly and the musicians and dancers amused the present courtiers with their art. The night was still young and the hearts open – it did not seem to matter what would come tomorrow, only the moment seemed to count, and the people cheered and laughed to undermine their carefreeness.

But the loudest laughter was the one of their lord and sovereign, Tōga – the greatest daiyōkai that had ever lived, and who had been named Inu no Taisho by his subjects and followers. No other ruler understood the art of governing as he did, and he was well-liked amongst both humans and yōkai. The West had prospered under his reign and peace and wealth had come to his people, making them confident, proud, and loyal to their master. And oh, it was indeed a time to celebrate! Not only had the harvest been generous this year and the people had been spared from the plague and hunger. A new era of peace had begun with the signing of the treaty of peace between the West and the Mainland, and with it new goods such as cloth and tea would find their way to the villages and towns. The future was looking brighter for them than ever before, and it warmed the heart of the emperor to know that his people were safe once more and looking forward to the days of wealth and happiness.

“To the strength of our men and to the beauty of our women!” He exclaimed, and his courtiers answered him with cheers and applause. His jovial character was one of the many features that made him so extremely popular. He was considered invincible, strong, and very wise. In fact, it was said that there was no scholar that could compete with him. For the men, he was the born leader, with a talent for military strategy and a strict sense of honour that he followed at all times. For the women, he was their saviour, strengthening their position in society continuously and treating them with respect. It was no wonder that many young women, regardless of their race, hoped to become his consorts or concubines. But despite having a reputation of not being able to resist a beautiful face, the emperor accepted very few women to this inner circle – which had eventually led to the most ardent relationship the courtiers had ever seen. The Emperor loved Lady Izayoi so deeply that he had made her his secondary wife after one night only, and he was often seen leaving her chambers in the early morning. His consort had remained entirely unimpressed at the developments. The Empress had been his wife for hundreds of years and enjoyed his unchallenged respect and affection. As long as she did not have to fear for her position, Empress Yonoko acted friendly towards all wives and concubines and did not stand in her husband’s way.

And so, she smiled lightly at her husband’s antics and fanned herself lazily as she watched Tōga laugh heartily, slapping his thighs at the joke of one of his men. He was in an excellent mood, and that transferred onto his people. Eyeing his cup of sake, she reached for the bottle and refilled it for him like a good wife would. Of course, he saw it, and to thank her he briefly touched her hand. For others, it was hardly visible, but Yonoko understood and appreciated this simple yet sweet gesture.

“Oh, you tell the best stories, indeed!” The Emperor chuckled, shaking his head as he had calmed down again. “Do tell your master my regards, and that I am looking forward to our next meeting. And please tell him that I am very happy about this most generous gift – a collection of treatises on philosophy is just what my library needed.”

That was a lie, and Yonoko knew it, but she said no word, watching the messenger of the Southern realm beam with pride and excitement at the compliment.

“I will, your majesty, I will tell him!” He assured him and bowed deeply to them once more before he moved aside quickly, making way for the next messenger. It was a rather tedious business in the opinion of the empress. Each time something truly important happened, people would send them gifts and messages to which they had to respond accordingly. And of course, her husband followed his duty without ever complaining. Indeed, he was a born ruler. That had attracted her to him in the first place.

That, and his lovely bottom.

“Ah, the messenger of the North,” Tōga said, taking a small sip from his wine before smiling at the man. “Ah, welcome to the West! Welcome! I don’t think that we have met before, or am I mistaken?”

The man that stood before them looked ordinary, even for a lesser yōkai that could not be more than a simple court official whose daily task was to carry scrolls from one room to another. Yonoko was sure that she would have remembered him just for his boringness if he had been to the West before. But of course, she would have never said such a thing out loud. Instead, she sipped her wine, watching the man bow to them with shaking legs.

“We have not, your majesty!” The man said and bowed again. “The Lord of the North sends his regards and congratulates you to this peaceful outcome of a terrible, terrible war!”

Tōga hummed. “Yes, it was about time, indeed,” he said, pushing a loose strand of hair out of his face. “We could not just sit there and watch the events unfold. It was necessary for the safety and peace in all realms of Japan. Your master agreed with me on this when we spoke about it.”

“He did!” The messenger confirmed and nodded vigorously. “And he was so pleased to hear about your success!”

 _‘Oh dear, you are trying too hard,’_ the empress thought as she studied the man with her beautiful golden eyes. The man was a fool, an outright idiot, but of course her husband would have never laughed at the messenger of an ally. No, her Tōga was too smart for that.

“I will soon send him a detailed description of the negotiations,” Tōga said with a reassuring nod. “I hope you are enjoying the feast?”

“Indeed, Mylord, indeed I am!” The messenger assured him. “The entertainment is fantastic and the dancers are exquisite, like nothing I have seen before. Truly, the women of the West are the most beautiful of them all, humans as well as yōkai!”

Tōga chuckled. “Yes, I must admit that our women are indeed very beautiful. That is because of the good air here, you see. That, and the good food.”

“Oh, the food, yes!” The messenger agreed, nodding quickly. “What a feast! Your subjects are truly lucky!”

“A good feast needs good food, yes,” Tōga said, leaning back on his seat, a clear sign that he was comfortable but also becoming a little impatient. Yonoko smiled to herself, taking a tiny sip from her wine.

At least the messenger seemed to understand, and he cleared his throat. “Your majesty, please allow me to present to you a gift from the son of my master, our beloved prince! He is sure that you will be delighted to receive such a treasure!”

Yonoko glanced at him with a knowing smile. Her husband loved presents if they were given out of honesty. With the northern prince, however, she was not too sure. She was unable to read Tōga’s mind, however, as his facial expression did not change.

“Very well, then,” Tōga said and nodded, allowing the messenger to present his gift. The man bowed lowly and hurried to the door to their left. Tōga raised an eyebrow and leant forward to catch a glimpse of what was about to happen, but he could not see a thing. Whatever it was that the northern prince had sent him – it was so big that it had to be carried into the room on a pedestal by four servants. Yonoko clacked her fan impatiently, frowning lightly at the something that was hidden under a silken cloth. What on earth had the northern prince sent to her husband that he not already possessed?

The messenger wrung his hands nervously as he watched the servants set down the pedestal, and when he could be sure that he had the attention of the emperor, and of everyone else in the room, he cleared his throat and raised his voice.

 _‘Like a town crier,’_ Yonoko thought.

“Your majesty, our most honourable Inu no Taisho! I present to you to your amusement and entertainment an exotic creature, stolen in a foreign land!” He reached for the cloth and pulled it off the pedestal, revealing the last thing that Yonoko or anyone else would have expected to find underneath the silk.

On the pedestal lay a young woman.

_‘Oh, you fool.’_

Everyone held their breath, looking up at Tōga with wide eyes as they waited for his reaction. But the messenger seemed completely oblivious to it. He bowed to Tōga, gesturing at the human. “We wish to give this tender flower to you, so that she may please you in any way you prefer.”

Yonoko sighed deeply. Oh, she knew where this was going. And it was not going to be nice.

Tōga looked down at the woman on the pedestal for a long moment, feeling the blood begin to boil in his veins. It was hardly a woman. She was young, more a girl than a grown woman, and the lack of appropriate clothing on her body clearly showed what she was. The northern prince had sent him a slave.

The messenger looked up, still smiling like an idiot. “Is she not beautiful? A delicate blossom, ready to be pi-“

Tōga rose from his seat at the head of the table, towering over the rest of the people in the room, including the northern messenger. He was a tall man, almost a giant, and his posture added to his frightening appearance. Only then the messenger realised that something was wrong, and he blinked in surprise, swallowing thickly as he witnessed the darkening of the emperor’s expression.

“How did the prince come to the assumption that a slave would be an appropriate gift for the West?” Tōga asked, his voice dangerously calm as he spoke. “A realm that has abolished slavery several centuries ago? Does the prince intend to criticise me?”

His stare sent shivers down the other man’s spine, and his eyes widened in shock as he realised that he had offered the emperor the greatest insult of a present possible.

“I… I thought that…” He looked around, desperately searching for help that would never come, and that left him no other choice but to throw himself to the emperor’s feet. “Forgive me, Mylord! This gift was chosen by me, not by our most honourable prince! Punish me, not him!”

“Oh, that I will do!” Tōga barked and already reached for his sword as Yonoko calmly touched his ankle. No, this was not the right time, nor the right place. Oh, the mess that would make!

The messenger let out a pathetic cry of fear, hiding his face between his hands as he waited for the deadly blow that never came. Instead, two pairs of hands grabbed him and pulled him to his feet.

“Throw him out,” Tōga growled, his eyes glowing dangerously red.

The soldiers nodded and dragged the messenger out of the room as he begged for forgiveness, but Tōga would not hear any of it. He looked the opposite direction, a clear sign that he was trying to stay calm. Yonoko frowned, gently tugging on his clothing. It was important that he sat down and pulled himself together, especially in front of their guests. Fortunately, he understood. Within the blink of an eye, he had turned around again and taken his seat beside her, reaching for the sake and emptying his cup in one go.

It was dangerously quiet in the room as they waited for their emperor to speak again. But Tōga would not say a word. Instead, he refilled his drink and drank a second cup, and then another, until the bottle was empty and his hands were not shaking anymore. Eventually, his eyes fell on the human in front of him.

She had curled up on the pedestal, hiding her face between her knees. Her dark hair surrounded her like a veil, shielding her from the eyes of the courtiers as they waited for their sovereign to speak. Only the empress knew what her husband was thinking, and she was not sure whether she liked it or not. Tōga felt responsible for the girl, and he was not sure how to proceed.

“Cover her and take her to my study,” he murmured and sighed deeply, rubbing his eyes as a guard stepped forward and wrapped the silken cloth around the girl’s narrow shoulders as he helped her to stand. Her legs were shaking as she rose, and Yonoko truly could not blame her. She even felt some pity for her as she watched the guard take the girl out of the room, away from the curious stares of the people to the study of her husband.

Tōga reached for another bottle of sake and took a few large sips before he rose from his seat and touched Yonoko’s shoulder, a sign that he wanted her to follow him. She rose immediately, smoothing out her kimono and holding her head high as she walked out of the room with him with the gracefulness of a goddess.

*******

Yonoko fanned herself anxiously as she watched her husband pace the room, following him with her eyes only. It was best not to interrupt him in his angry tirade, as it helped him to think. A clear mind was what he needed for rational decisions.

“How on earth did this idiot get the idea that a slave was an appropriate present?” Tōga groaned, shaking his head as he looked at his wife for a moment. “No, we shall not punish her for it. This is hardly her fault.”

Yonoko nodded lightly, turning her fan in her hand as she waited for her husband to continue. When he remained silent, she said: “Well, my dear, what shall happen with her now? Do you wish to send her back?”

Tōga shook his head. “We cannot do that. She would be sold back into slavery. And if we let her go, she would probably starve on the streets. Or she would be forced to sell her body.” He closed his eyes as he tried not to think of the horrors that awaited homeless women, a problem he had yet to solve.

The door to his right opened and the guard came in, leading the girl into the room. He had wrapped a yukata around her that he had probably gotten from a servant. Yonoko was glad that the woman was not half naked anymore but clothed as it was appropriate. The guard led her to the middle of the room and bowed once more to them before he left, closing the door behind him.

Tōga turned around to the girl, studying her from head to toe. She was looking down at her feet, her long hair hiding her face like a veil. Clearing his throat, he stepped forward, clasping his hands on his back and smiling kindly at the girl. Yonoko watched him, her face expressionless.

“You do not have to be afraid, girl,” Tōga said softly. “You have come to a safe place. No harm will come to you. What is your name?”

The girl was shaking like a leaf, and Yonoko was sure that even if she had wanted to speak she would not have been able to. The girl remained silent, staring down at the floor.

Tōga frowned a little. “Where do you come from?”

Again, there was no answer.

“Do you know where you are?”

As the girl remained silent again, Yonoko sighed. Oh, what a tedious business!

Tōga, however, remained patient. “Do you understand what I am saying?” He asked softly. “May I at least know that?”

At first, Yonoko thought the girl was about to collapse, but then, she saw her nod ever so lightly. At least the girl spoke their language.

Tōga sighed in relief. They were making some progress, then. “Were you bought as a slave?”

Again, the girl nodded lightly, keeping her eyes fixed on the ground.

“Don’t you want to tell us your name?”

“My dear,” Yonoko said. “If I remember correctly, a slave has no name. Their owners give them their names. You can ask her as much as you like, but she won’t give you an answer.”

Tōga blinked. “Oh. Yes. Of course.” He cleared his throat and clasped his hands on his back again as he began to pace the room once more. What was there to do with a girl that did not have a name, and that did not speak?

“We cannot send her back, Tōga, we already decided that,” Yonoko reminded him softly.

“Yes, I know,” he murmured, looking at the girl again.

Yonoko rolled her eyes. “You have already decided for yourself that she will stay here,” she said to her husband, clacking with her fan impatiently. “So she might become a maid here or something like that?”

Tōga sighed. His wife knew him far too well. It was not a surprise after so many centuries of marriage. He turned around again and approached the girl, carefully reaching out to push the hair out of her face. To his surprise, she did not move back. She winced, but remained where she was.

The girl that stood before him was pretty, despite her current state. She was slightly underfed, but that was nothing good food could not fix. But she was weak, and in a terrible state, unfit for the position of a maid. It was hard work.

“Sesshōmaru,” he murmured.

Yonoko frowned. “Pardon?”

“The position of a maid would be too much for her,” Tōga said. “In the state she is currently in, she would probably not make it through the first week. And it would be a poor redemption for the suffering she has endured.”

There it was again, the kind heart of her husband. He was not responsible for the injustice in the North, but Tōga had always wanted to save everyone and everything. This girl was certainly no exception. Yonoko, however, still did not know what it was that he had in mind, and so, she could only sit and wait for him to continue.

“She shall become the secondary wife of Sesshōmaru,” Tōga said. “A life in safety and comfort in order to make up for what she has endured. That is the least that I, as the sovereign, can give her.” He looked back at the girl, gently touching her cheek and lifting her chin. She looked at him with wide eyes, but there was no terror in them. Instead, it was pure shock.

“Of course, I will give you a choice,” he said to her. “You may leave, if you wish. No one shall stop you. Or you may stay. You will be treated well, as a free woman, and secondary wife to my son.”

Yonoko held her breath. This was, by far, the most unusual idea her husband had voiced in several decades. Their son was probably the last person she would have given a human girl to. Not because she did not like him. She merely knew him.

“Do you wish to stay?” Tōga asked the girl, letting go of her chin. “I would be happy if you did.”

For a long moment, it seemed as if the girl had turned to stone on the spot. Yonoko could only imagine the things that were going through the girl’s mind at the moment, and she was sure that if she had known about the prince, she would have already shaken her head. Sesshōmaru was not exactly known for his fondness towards humans.

But then, after what seemed like an eternity, the girl nodded. It was a tiny, single nod, barely noticeable, but it was there.

Tōga smiled, nodding approvingly. “Good. I am very pleased to hear that. You shall not regret it.” He clasped his hands on his back again and studied her closely. “Now what we need for you is a name. Dearest?”

Yonoko rose from her cushion and approached the girl, studying her from head to toe. There were so many names to choose from, but how was she supposed to give a name to a girl she knew nothing about, except for the fact that she had been a slave and came from the North?

The girl lifted her hand and pushed a strand of hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear in a way that Yonoko had admit was rather graceful for a former slave.

“Rin,” Tōga said.

Yonoko raised an eyebrow. “Huh?”

“That means _dignified_ ,” the daiyōkai said and looked down at the human girl. “And today, she will receive her dignity back.”

“Ah.” Yonoko understood. She had to admit that the name was fitting for the girl, especially in this situation. “Well, then.” She began to fan herself again and went to the door, calling for a maid.

“You will be taken to your new rooms now,” Tōga said, and the girl named Rin looked up at him voluntarily for the first time. Her eyes were of a deep brown, and Tōga wondered how many days of sorrow they had witnessed.

A moment later a maid entered the room, gently taking Rin by her arm and leading her out of the room. The moment the door closed behind them, Yonoko turned around to her husband once more.

“Do you think this is a good idea?” She asked Tōga and raised a perfect eyebrow. “Making her a secondary wife to Sesshōmaru? He will not be pleased.”

“I know,” Tōga said with a deep sigh. “But it is time that he takes another wife. Caring for her will teach him compassion and humbleness. Heaven knows he needs it.”

Yonoko eyed her husband suspiciously. She often wondered what was going on in his head, and although she knew what he was thinking most of the time, he never failed to surprise her,

“Fine,” she said. “You take the responsibility.”

Tōga gave her a warm smile. “You have a kind heart, too, Yonoko. You only hide it well.”

Yonoko huffed. “Don’t you dare.” She stood on her toes and kissed his cheek lightly. “Goodnight.”

As Tōga retired to his chambers that night, drinking a last cup of sake, he was sure that he had done the right thing. The girl was not responsible for what had happened to her, and giving her a life in dignity – and a name that reflected that – was the least he could do.

The only question that remained was the one that concerned his son. Tōga was no fool: Sesshōmaru would not react well, and ignore his secondary wife. But this was not what this was about. First and foremost, it was about the wellbeing of the girl named Rin.

And perhaps, if it was in the kami’s favour, it would teach his son humbleness and compassion. But that was written in the stars.


	2. Izayoi

A girl named Rin lay on the futon, staring at the ceiling.

As the maid had taken her away from the yōkai and his wife, she had led her down countless hallways, around numerous corners, until they had reached an entirely different part of the palace. It was hidden away behind large gates, marking the entrance to an entirely new world. The realm of women, the maid had called it, and as the gates had closed behind them, Rin had realised that this was her new home now, too.

In this empire, the lives of men were separated from those of their women.

The duvet the maid had placed over her was heavy, but it was warm, like the embrace of a loved one. At least that was how the girl named Rin imagined an embrace to be. Warm, soothing, and comforting. Like a duvet one curled up under at night.

He had named her Dignity. A name was something precious, something one should keep hidden away in one’s heart, only revealing it to those that one loved. As a slave, she had not been deemed worthy of a name. She was sure that a long time ago, her mother had given her a name, but she neither remembered her name nor the face of her mother. From what she knew, her mother could have been a slave, too, just like her. Her father remained as unknown as her origin, and she had learnt to never ask those forbidden questions. A slave did not have a history. A slave existed for as long as the master wished. A slave had no dignity.

And yet, her name was Rin.

The Emperor whose name she did not know had given her a name and made her a free woman. Additionally, he had given her a life, and a husband, too. Although she was only the secondary wife of a man she had yet to meet, the girl named Rin knew that she had to thank the gods on her knees for this chance. She had felt their holy light embrace her the moment she had laid eyes on the emperor’s face, and she had known that she was safe. No harm would come to her at this place. Not as long as he was there.

The West was a foreign land to the girl named Rin, but she would make it her home. The people here spoke in a way that was unknown to her, but she understood most of it if she only listened carefully. For now, that was all she could do. The moment she had been taken away for punishment, she had lost her voice. It had not returned since.

One day, she would be able to express her gratitude to the emperor, and to the kami.

She only had to be patient.

*******

The sound of tiny feet toddling across the floor was music to the ears of the Lady Izayoi. It meant that her little bundle of joy was awake and eager to see her like every morning. She thanked her maids for brushing her hair and then rose from her dressing table, turning around as the nursemaid came in. Her baby boy squealed in joy at the sight of his mother, taking small, tentative steps towards her while his nursemaid held his little hands for support. Lady Izayoi gasped in delight and knelt down, holding out her hands for her son as the nursemaid let go, and the prince almost jumped into the arms of his mother, squeaking in excitement.

“Good morning, my darling boy,” she hummed and kissed his silver hair gently. “Did you have a good night, hm? Were you a good boy for Mama?”

The nursemaid smiled and bowed her head affirmatively. “His highness behaved like an angel, as usual. He slept through the entire night and did not wake even once. As if he knew that he was a prince.”

Izayoi laughed, hugging her child. “Oh, of course you know that, my darling boy,” she said. “But now you surely must be hungry after such a long night.” She settled against a cushion and allowed her maid to open her kimono a little, revealing a full breast for which the baby boy reached instinctively.

The nursemaid cleared her throat. “Mylady, forgive me, but…”

“I know,” Izayoi sighed, gently stroking her son’s hair. “And yet, I cannot help it. I only want the best for my little jewel.”

“His majesty would not be pleased, Mylady,” the nursemaid said. “And as the prince is already one year old, a wet nurse would be the best choice for him.”

Izayoi sighed deeply, gently rocking her son in her arms. “I know. They grow up so fast… please do look for a wet nurse, then. A human one, if you please.”

“Very good, Mylady,” the nursemaid said and bowed deeply to her mistress before she went to do as she was told. Izayoi watched her leave, shaking her head as she sighed once more and looked down at her happily suckling boy.

“She does not know what she is talking about,” she murmured. “But your most honourable father only means well. May you be as good and kind as he is to me, my little sunshine.”

The prince beamed up at his mother with his big, golden eyes that he had inherited from his father, and Izayoi could not help but feel her heart swell with pride at this sight. Oh, the kami had been too kind to her, and had not only blessed her with a man that loved and admired her more than anything else, but also with a precious little baby to call her own. Although she had hoped for a little girl that she could hug and kiss and dress up like a doll, a little princess that would not become part of the court of politics, she had been overjoyed at the birth of the prince. That day, the emperor had gifted her a pearl necklace not valuable in gold and silver, and once more, she had been reaffirmed of his love and admiration.

When her son had finished his breakfast Izayoi set him down on the floor and let the maid readjust her kimono for her, making sure her lady was properly dressed. “What a beautiful morning,” Izayoi said. “The sun is shining outside as well as indoors.” She smiled at her son, who squeaked in joy and gave his mother the brightest smile. “Is the new girl awake already, Yona-san?”

“The maids are trying to bathe her, Mylady,” Yona answered.

Izayoi frowned. “Trying, you say?”

“Yes, Mylady. The most honourable lady is shy, it seems.”

“Oh dear!” Izayoi reached for her son and rose from her cushion. “Then it is our duty to make her feel welcome. Heaven knows that I remember my first morning in this palace very well.”

“Very good, Mylady,” Yona said and bowed her head as she followed her mistress out of the room and down the hallway to the other side of the shiro. The heavy, pink kimono of Izayoi seemed to float above the wooden floor as she walked, like gentle waves at the shore of a lake. There was no other human woman at court as graceful as she was, and people even compared her to the empress behind their fans. Even with a baby in her arms she was as graceful as a swan.

From afar they could hear the voices of the maids, trying to convince the young woman to trust them, but it seemed as if their efforts remained fruitless. “Please, Mylady, the water is at the perfect temperature! I am sure that you will enjoy it!”

“The finest soap will enchant your senses, Mylady!”

Yona opened the door for her lady and Izayoi stepped inside, finding a small army of maids standing around a completely intimidated young girl that was clutching her yukata tightly. Oh, did these maids never learn!

At the sight of the Lady Izayoi they stepped back and bowed deeply, and even the girl lowered her head, as if she were afraid of doing something wrong. Izayoi pitied the girl immediately. She had heard about the girl’s destiny from her beloved as he had come to her chamber the night before, and she had known instantly that she had to do her best to help the girl feel welcome.

“Good morning,” Izayoi said. “Please, would you leave us alone for a moment?”

The maids nodded and quickly moved out of the way, closing the curtains around them to give the women some privacy. Izayoi gave the girl a kind smile as she approached her. “Please, my dear, there is no reason to be afraid. Your name is Rin, yes?”

The girl stared at her with wide eyes, like a deer running away from the hunter. She was obviously scared and intimidated, and oh, Izayoi truly could not blame her. “My name is Izayoi,” she explained softly. “I am the secondary wife to his majesty, the Emperor. Allow me to welcome you to the Western Palace. Please, there is no need to be shy.”

The girl named Rin swallowed thickly and pulled her clothing a little tighter around herself as she nodded lightly.

Izayoi inclined her head to her. “It is a pleasure to meet you, Lady Rin. There is no need to speak if you do not want to.” Tōga had told her that the girl was mute. She probably only needed some time to settle in, Izayoi thought.

Rin’s eyes fell on the little boy in Izayoi’s arms, and the prince squeaked and reached out for the stranger. Izayoi chuckled. “This is my son, Prince Inuyasha. Say hello to Lady Rin!”

The boy babbled happily and looked around curiously, as he had never been in these rooms before. Izayoi chuckled at that. “A bath has been prepared for you, Rin-chan. Would you not like to wash yourself before getting dressed?”

Rin swallowed thickly, looking down nervously. Yes, she wanted to bath, but…

Izayoi followed her gaze, only to spot the blood that was gently pouring down the girl’s leg to her ankle. She understood immediately. There was nothing more embarrassing in such a new situation.

She turned around and handed her son to Yona, who was waiting by the curtain. “Please prepare a pair of padded koshimaki for the Lady Rin,” she said to the maids and carefully drew the curtains again to be alone with the girl that was now her sister. All she needed was a gentle hand and, most of all, a friend to guide her.

“I will take care of you,” Izayoi promised and reached out to take Rin’s hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “If you bathe now we shall have breakfast together afterwards. What do you think?”

Rin hesitated, looking at Izayoi with wide eyes before she slowly nodded, lowering her hands to take off her clothing. Indeed, she was hungry and she was sure she smelt worse than a pig at the moment. It was high time for a bath – a luxury she had never had before.

Izayoi took the clothing and gave it to the maids waiting behind the curtain as Rin stepped into the bathtub to wash herself. It was the first step on a long journey, and Izayoi was pleased that the girl seemed to trust her. It was important for her to have a friend, especially these days as a new member of the inner quarters. Tōga would surely be pleased if she told him about it.

Izayoi sat down and clasped her hands on her lap as the maids washed Rin’s body and hair. The girl held surprisingly still, apparently realising that they meant no harm and only wished to help her. The maids were careful, cleaning her body with a soft cloth, adding soaps and oils to the hot water to please the young lady, and as they finally poured water over her head to rinse out her hair, Izayoi noticed that it was in fact not brown, but of a beautiful, shiny black. It had apparently been a while since the girl had been bathed last, and so, Izayoi was even more pleased when she descended from the water as a new human being.

A maid helped Rin to put on her new koshimaki while another began with the first layer of her kimono, wrapping clothing after clothing around the girl’s body until she was dressed appropriately. It was a light kimono, perfect for sunny days like these and not too restraining around the middle. A pair of tabi socks would keep her small feet warm, and a pair of comfortable zori enabled her to walk around without getting her feet dirty. As the maids stepped back, Izayoi gasped in delight. “Oh, how lovely you look, Rin-chan!”

The girl blushed, playing nervously with the hem of her sleeve, which made her an even more adorable sight. “Come, then, we shall have breakfast,” Izayoi said and linked Rin’s arm with hers, taking her to the table next door where a lavish breakfast had just been served for the women. Izayoi sat down and poured Rin a cup of tea. “Come! You must be hungry.”

Rin slowly sat down at the table, obviously not sure how to sit in such a heavy kimono. But Izayoi thought that she was doing rather well, and that she looked even adorable like this. Oh, she was a sweet girl indeed. If she only spoke!

Izayoi called for her maid, who took Inuyasha back into the room and placed him in his mother’s arms. The boy babbled away happily and chewed on his little hand as his mother began to eat. Izayoi knew better than to force the girl to talk. She would give her all the time she needed, and guide her in these first few days of her new life. They would surely become friends, and oh, the kami knew that Rin would need a friend.

Izayoi had been very surprised when Tōga had told her about his decision to make the former slave girl the secondary wife of his eldest son and heir, Sesshōmaru. At first, Izayoi had thought him to be jesting, but Tōga had been serious. Of course, Izayoi understood why, and she agreed with him that Sesshōmaru needed to learn compassion and humility. But was giving him a former slave girl as a wife the right way to do so?

Sesshōmaru, the crown prince, was not exactly famous for his fondness for humans. In fact, he preferred to ignore Izayoi and the human concubines most of the time, only speaking to them when he had to. Many times, his father had complained to her about him, and she had told him that he only had to be patient with his son. But Tōga’s patience was now wearing thin. Sesshōmaru had been married to crown princess Kagura for a long time now, and he had still not gotten rid of his stubborn attitude.

Just then the door to Rin’s left opened and a tall woman with black hair came in. Her heavy kimono was of a white and purple pattern, and as her eyes fell on Rin, she raised an eyebrow. “Oh, my.” Her face was unreadable, but Rin had never seen a woman before that seemed both godlike and terrifying at the same time. Her skin was as white as the finest porcelain, but her eyes were as red as blood, and her gaze sent shivers down Rin spine as she seemed to look right into her soul.

Izayoi cleared her throat. “Rin-chan, this is her highness, Princess Kagura,” she explained softly. “The first wife of Prince Sesshōmaru.”

Rin’s eyes widened in shock and she dropped her bowl of rice, bowing to Kagura the way a servant would, pressing her forehead to the ground. The woman was surely not pleased about her presence, oh no. In the north men only had one wife, and those that took a second wife always had to fear the wrath of the other woman.

“Oh dear,” Kagura said with a chuckle. “What a display.” She knelt down in front of Rin, raising her chin with her fan to force her to look at her “There is no need to bow to me like that, child. We share a husband, after all.” She sat back on her heels, looking at Izayoi. “How are you feeling?”

“Oh, I’m feeling wonderful,” Izayoi assured her, bouncing Inuyasha gently on her lap. “Has Sesshōmaru returned already?”

“Not yet, no,” Kagura said with a small sigh. “But I doubt that he will be pleased about… these new developments.” She rose again, smoothing out her kimono. “I will be in my rooms.” And with that, she walked out of the room, leaving behind a very confused and scared Rin.

“Oh, you don’t have to worry, Rin-chan!” Izayoi said quickly and reached for Rin’s hands. “You did nothing wrong! Kagura can be a little intimidating but she is a good person. And Sesshōmaru-sama is just the same. He will be good to you, I promise.”

Of course, she could not promise anything, but oh, she would make sure that her step-son was treating the girl well, even if it was the last thing she did!

“Oh dear,” Izayoi sighed as a few tears rolled down Rin’s cheeks, and she quickly moved closer to her, reaching for a handkerchief. “There is no need to cry, my dear. Everything will be fine, trust me. You will have a wonderful life here, and no harm will come to you.” She gently dried Rin’s tears and then cupped her cheeks. “Trust in the kami and they will guide you. And if you impress your husband, they will bless you with a little one, just as sweet and pure as my little boy over there!”

Rin swallowed thickly, glancing at Inuyasha who was playing with an empty bowl, as if she was not sure if she could believe Izayoi’s words.

“Yes, trust me,” Izayoi said gently. “I was once as shy as you are now. Oh, I could hardly look his majesty in the eye! But he was nothing but kind to me, and soon after he made me his secondary wife, the kami blessed me with my son, and even now Tōga-sama can hardly keep his hands off me. See?” She pushed a few layers of her kimono aside to reveal a small, perfectly rounded baby bump. “The kami will bless you too once the time comes. But you must be patient, and listen to your heart. Yes?”

Rin sniffed, nodding lightly as she buried her face in her hands. Izayoi gently rubbed her back, sending all the maids away that came to collect the empty bowls. It would be a difficult time for the young woman, especially once Sesshōmaru returned to the palace, but she would be with her on every step of the way.

The world of women was a tiny one, and therefore, they had to look after one another.


	3. The Heart of a Friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to those who have already left kudos and comments! ^_^ They keep me going!
> 
> Warning for smut in this chapter! And an awful load of fluff ;)

One of the greatest gifts of the Lady Izayoi was that she did not distinguish between classes. To her, every soul was precious, and therefore, she was called the Angel of the court by many. It pleased the emperor very much to hear the people praise her, and he never grew tired of witnessing her acts of kindness. The fact she was taking care so naturally of Rin only added to his admiration for her, and he could not help but watch the women take a walk through the garden from afar.

It had taken Izayoi some time to convince Rin to join her, but eventually, the young girl had agreed to come with her for a walk through the palace gardens. Izayoi did not say much and merely watched as Rin admired the masterpiece the gardeners had created. Oh, she remembered her first walk through the garden so well as if it had been only yesterday. Her beloved had taken her out for a stroll and she had walked arm in arm with him, admiring the sheer beauty and magnificence of mother nature. She knew only too well how Rin felt.

“It can be quite overwhelming,” she said softly as Rin stopped at a bush to admire the blossoms. “But you get used to it after a while. The colours and scents…” She clasped her hands, watching as Rin went to the next flower, kneeling to take in its heavy fragrance. Izayoi had to admit that it was a lovely sight. Rin seemed to fit into this place like a bird into its nest. Oh, how she hoped for a happy life for her new sister!

But with Sesshōmaru as Rin’s husband, she was sure that it would be a rather hard piece of work.

The Crown Prince was a difficult man, not only to his family but to everyone at court. He was stubborn, arrogant, proud, obstinate, often showed rather obnoxious behaviour towards both family and servants, and thought very little of humans. Izayoi was sure that he only treated her with due respect because she was his father’s wife, and his father was the only man he respected, feared even. But Izayoi was not worried about herself. She only worried about Rin. The girl was delicate, and the fact she did not speak would certainly not add to Sesshōmaru’s affection for her. If she was lucky, he would merely ignore her. If she was not, he would try to make her life hell. But oh, she would make sure he did not dare to treat her badly.

Not after the misery Rin had gone through.

They took a seat under the cherry tree, watching the leaves fall into the gentle stream.

“Do you know how old you are, Rin-chan?” Izayoi asked, playing with her fan.

Rin grasped the hem of her sleeve, shaking her head as a slight blush spread over her cheeks.

“Oh, that’s alright,” Izayoi assured her and reached for her hand. “There is no shame in not knowing. It might be a blessing even! So many women worry about their age, you see.” Then she reached for the teapot, pouring Rin a cup. “This is raspberry tea,” she explained. “It will ease the cramps you must surely have. It truly is an advantage of a pregnancy that women are free of these things during this truly blessed time.”

She pushed the cup towards Rin, and the girl took it hesitantly, taking a small sip of it. Izayoi hummed to herself as she poured herself a cup of tea as well. She did not mind that the girl did not know their customs, and that she therefore had to pour herself a cup. It was refreshing to be with someone that had not been ruined by courtly protocol yet, with someone that was so free in mind and spirit.

“I wish I knew what was going on in your head, Rin-chan,” she said after a while. “Then I would know what to say or do to comfort you. To help you settle in. But we have all the time in the world for that.”

Rin met her gaze, and for a moment it seemed as if she wanted to say something; her lips seemed to move and she swallowed thickly, as if the words were stuck in her throat, but as she opened her mouth no sound came out.

“Do not force yourself, Rin-chan,” Izayoi said softly as Rin lowered her gaze in shame. “Take your time. Now, would you like to hear more about the palace?”

Rin shook her head, placing her small hand on Izayoi’s instead. She frowned. “About me? You would like to hear about me?”

Rin nodded.

“Oh.” Izayoi laughed and blushed all over. “Oh, where do I begin? Well… I came to the palace when my father was summoned here to become a secretary of his majesty. But unfortunately, my father fell sick and he died a few months later. I was devastated, but I was allowed to stay, as I had no mother anymore. I was only twelve years old, and I thought I would never find happiness again. But the mother of his majesty, the late dowager empress, had taken a liking to me for some reason and took care of me. One day, a few years later, I was walking through the garden with her, and we encountered her son, the Emperor. Oh, what a day that was! I will never forget it as long as I live!” Izayoi laughed softly, hiding her face behind her delicate hands. “His smile was most captivating! And although I was hiding my face behind my fan as appropriate, I knew he was looking at me all the time. That night, he came to this place, asking me to join him for a walk. And only a day later he returned, taking me by my arms, and declaring his love for me, asking me to allow him to court me. Oh, I blush when I only think of it!” Izayoi giggled, lowering her hands again. “And so he did, courting me for weeks until I allowed him to enter my bedchamber. Oh, what a wonderful night we had together. He was still trembling when he left my side the following morning.” She reached for her cup and took a small sip before she continued. “Just a few days later, he asked me to become his secondary wife,” she said with a smile. “Of course, I accepted. I had just turned seventeen, and my life was suddenly changing for the better. And about one year later I had my little jewel. Oh, his majesty was overjoyed, and so was I.”

Izayoi placed the cup on the small table between them and clasped her hands on her lap, the perfect lady in every situation. “And I have been blessed with another so very soon after Inuyasha’s birth. His majesty is very happy, of course, and he spoils me so. He sends me flowers every morning and asks about my health whenever he sees me.” She sighed softly, closing her eyes for a moment as she caressed her small baby bump. “He is a good man. And I love him very, very much.”

Rin sat completely still, looking at Izayoi with her big, brown eyes as she wondered if there could truly be happiness at a place like this. She had always been told that the rich and noble usually led a life of misery, surrounded by all their wealth and money. But the Lady Izayoi seemed so completely different. She seemed happy.

Perhaps she could find happiness here, too.

A soft meow broke the silence between them, and as Izayoi opened her eyes again she found a cat rubbing her head against Rin’s leg. The Rin she saw then was an entirely different person. The girl was smiling, reaching for the animal and holding it against her chest. The cat purred in delight, allowing Rin to hug and kiss her.

Izayoi smiled. Animals had a very different way of communicating, and perhaps this was what Rin needed at the moment. A companion as quiet as she was.

“Little kitty,” the girl whispered, scratching the cat behind the ear.

Her voice was faint, but it was there. It was soft and gentle, like the sound of a koto, and Izayoi was sure that Rin had a lovely singing voice.

“Ah! What a beautiful sight!”

The Emperor himself had decided to reveal himself, stepping out onto the path, making his way towards the women with bouncy steps. Izayoi’s face lit up and she inclined her head to him in greeting. If they had been alone, she would have greeted him with a kiss, but as Rin was with her, she would do her best to be a good role model. Fortunately, Rin understood, and she followed her example and bowed to Tōga as well.

“Ah, there is no need for formalities,” Tōga said as he walked up to them and took Izayoi’s hands. “My delicate blossom, how are you feeling today?”

Izayoi blushed. “I am feeling very well, Mylord,” she said. “I was just telling the Lady Rin about the time we first met.”

Tōga smiled knowingly. “A fond memory, indeed,” he said and let go of Izayoi’s hands, looking at Rin. “And you, Lady Rin? Have you slept well?”

Rin raised her head again, nodding lightly, avoiding his gaze. It surely was considered treason to look the emperor in the eye.

But Tōga had never cared a lot about the official protocol. He felt responsible for this girl, and he hoped that she would quickly settle in. At least she had a friend in Izayoi. He reached out and gently grasped Rin’s chin, turning her head to look her in the eye. She looked at him with wide eyes, obviously afraid. But Tōga kept smiling at her, hoping she understood the gesture.

“There is no need to be afraid of anyone here, Lady Rin,” he said. “I hope that you have had a good night and a nice first morning here. I asked Lady Izayoi to take care of you for now. You must surely be very confused in this so very new environment.”

Rin nodded shyly, averting her gaze again after a moment only. Tōga did not mind. She was shy, and he would not force her to come out of her shell just yet. She needed time, and he was sure that the girl would soon find a time to shine once she had settled into her new life. Perhaps it was good that his son was not around at the moment. His presence would have only scared her, that he was sure about.

Tōga let go of Rin’s chin again and rose. Only then Rin realised how tall the man actually was. Compared to him, Izayoi was tiny.

“Lady Izayoi, would you care to come with me for a moment?”

Izayoi smiled and took the hand that he offered her as she rose from her cushion. “It won’t be long,” she said to Rin as she walked away with her sovereign, following him through the garden and behind the many bushes for a moment of privacy.

The cat climbed into Rin’s lap again and purred in delight as Rin stroked its fur. It was a pretty cat and well looked-after, probably the pet of one of the ladies. What a strange pet for a court of inu yōkai, Rin thought as she scratched the cat behind the ear, letting her eyes wander. The garden was indeed a little paradise, and she understood only too well why Izayoi loved to spend the afternoons here. It seemed as if the kami had kissed this place, protecting those that wandered in it, embracing them with the beauty of the nature they had created.

Rin had never regarded the gods as her protectors. All her life, she had been nothing but a slave. A thing without a name, someone that was always addressed as “hey, you there!” or “girl, come on!” wherever she went. Nonetheless, she had been lucky enough. She had never been sold to a brothel, and no master that had ever owned her had touched her.

Perhaps the kami had been with her from the very beginning, guiding her and protecting her to make sure she ended up at this place.

A soft laugh caught her attention, and as Rin turned her head, she saw Izayoi and the emperor stand by the pond, holding each other in a loving embrace. He had put his large hand on her belly and whispered something into her ear, to which Izayoi responded with a giggle and a gentle nod before her beloved lowered his head to kiss her lips.

Rin quickly averted her gaze. She was sure that she was not supposed to witness such a private moment between the sovereign and his secondary wife. But she could not help but admire them for what they had. A love so pure and deep for one another. Izayoi was truly a lucky woman. Very few very lucky enough to be loved by yōkai – even Rin had learnt that a very long time ago. But while the North seemed to separate humans and yōkai, the West seemed to do the opposite, and the Emperor and the Lady Izayoi were the perfect example of a peaceful coexistence.

Perhaps the Crown Prince would be as gentle with her as the Emperor was with his beloved.

A few minutes later Izayoi returned to her side, her face reddened from the passionate kisses of her lover.

“He wishes to see me tonight,” she told Rin in a whisper. “Despite the baby. Oh, he is the sweetest!” She giggled and shook her head in embarrassment. “Now come! There is so much more to see and do!”

*******

The women spent the rest of the afternoon wandering through the palace, and Izayoi took the opportunity to introduce Rin to everyone she deemed important. Over the course of a few hours only Rin got to know almost every servant and every woman that lived in their part of the palace, and she was sure that beyond the gates more names were waiting to be remembered. But Izayoi assured her new friend that she did not have to know them all. For now, she would be safe in the sanctuary of their shiro, and the only names she had to remember belonged to those closest to her.

The servants were something Rin would have to get used to. Never before had other women helped her dress or bathe, as she had always been the one to serve others. But these women were no slaves. They were the daughters of politicians and other noblemen as well as free women sent to serve the Imperial family and those that belonged to the inner quarters. They were kind and tried their best to make Rin feel at home, never pressuring her into talking. Rin would not have interfered with their work anyway – she followed their routine and allowed them to dress her for bed while Izayoi explained to her what a typical day in the shiro looked like. The servants would come to her in the morning and evenings, and they would be around at all times in case she required anything. Not that Rin was planning to have these women do everything for her. The mere thought of having people carry her things made her feel uncomfortable, and she remembered with horror how she had always been treated by the wives of her masters if she had done something wrong. No, she would not let that happen.

As it was time to retire for the night, all maids except for one left the room after wishing her a good night’s rest. Izayoi rose from her place by the window and took Rin’s arm, leading her behind the partition to her futon where the other maid was kneeling and waiting for Rin to lie down.

“That is important now,” Izayoi said and gestured at the futon. A large, white sheet had been put on the lower half of the bed, and Rin wondered what it was for. It certainly had not been there the night before.

“At the moment you are bleeding,” Izayoi explained. “For the duration of your bleeding you will sleep with a white sheet wrapped around your waist to soak up the blood. It will be removed in the mornings by your maid and taken to the healer. The morning the sheet is white, you will have your examination.”

Rin’s eyes widened in shock at that and she shook her head vigorously, stepping back from the futon as the most horrible memories flashed through her mind; memories of slave markets and greedy customers, and potential buyers ‘checking’ for her potential value. No. Not again. Not here.

“Rin…” Izayoi said softly, taking her hands. “Rin, you do not have to be scared. That is an entirely normal ceremony.” She pulled Rin closer, trying to soothe the shaking girl. “You see, before a girl marries, a healer is invited to her home on the first day of her bleeding. And when it is over, she is examined in order to see if she is healthy and able to have babies. So many girls have been helped by their healers in the past, and they were able to have happy lives with their husbands because of them.” She cupped Rin’s cheeks and kissed her forehead gently. “It does not hurt, I promise. I have undergone this ceremony before I became the secondary wife of his majesty, and I was examined again after I had my little boy. It is all for our wellbeing, you see? Not to determine our value. Do you trust me?”

Yes. She trusted Izayoi. But she did not trust the healer she had yet to meet.

“I promise that it won’t hurt,” Izayoi said, giving her hands a gentle squeeze. “And if you like, I will be with you at all times and make sure you are being comfortable. Yes?”

Rin swallowed thickly, her gaze falling on the white sheet again. It was not a slave market, she told herself. She was not a slave anymore. The emperor had said that she was a free woman. And did that not mean she could refuse things? That she could tell people no?

But she did not have the heart to tell Izayoi no. She had been nothing but kind to her, and she believed her. She had no other choice.

And so, Rin nodded ever so lightly.

Izayoi smiled encouragingly at her. “You will make your husband very happy,” she said and let go of Rin’s hands. “Come.”

She guided Rin back to the futon and helped her lie down. Rin lay completely still, trying to think of something else as her yukata was pushed upwards to expose her lower body. But only a second later the maid wordlessly wrapped the sheet around her waist, covering her again.

“Good.” Izayoi put the duvet over Rin and stroked her cheek gently. “See? That was not so bad, no?” She pecked Rin’s forehead again. “Good night, Rin. Sleep well.”

But before she could rise again, Rin had taken her hand. She looked up at Izayoi, and the other woman began to worry that she had done something wrong as Rin’s lips formed a silent ‘thank you’.

Izayoi nodded softly. “I will always help you, Rin,” she said quietly.

As she left her room and went back to her own, she could not help but wonder what it was that had scared Rin so much. She surely had gone through horrible things in the past. But had healers been part of it, too? The people whose very profession it was to help?

But the Lady Izayoi was wise enough to not ask questions. If Rin did not wish to speak about her past, then she would not pressure her into it. She would give Rin all the time she needed to blossom, from a bud to a beautiful rose. And then, if the kami were with them and Rin was lucky, she would stir compassion in the heart of the Crown Prince.

At the moment, however, Izayoi had little hope that Prince Sesshōmaru would realise what a jewel his father had given him to protect.

*******

The night had fallen and it was quiet in the palace of the West. Only a few servants were up, keeping the fires going and delivering secret love notes from one room to another, making sure to never be seen nor heard. It was the time of lovers, of bodies embracing each other in the darkness and the sanctuary of their rooms.

The shiro of the women was no exception.

Izayoi lay awake and looked up at the ceiling, her beloved snoring peacefully beside her. After their lovemaking, he had fallen asleep quickly, but Izayoi did not mind. He had been exhausted from the last few days, from welcoming and entertaining guests while doing his daily work at the same time. It was only natural that he would pass out in her arms, in a place where he felt safe and loved. Just like her. The day she had become his wife, she had found her place in life. And she would thank the kami every day for their blessing.

She felt Tōga stir beside her, and a moment later, she felt his strong arms around her, pulling her against him.

“Hm, Izayoi,” he mumbled, his voice deep and tender as he nuzzled her neck, pressing gentle kisses to her skin. “My delicate blossom.”

Izayoi smiled softly and closed her eyes at his touch, giving in to the lovely feeling of his hands on her body. Oh, how she longed for his touch at night, and how wonderful it was to have her dreams come true! Tōga was always incredibly gentle with her, taking care of her needs as if she were his empress and he were her servant only.

She sighed blissfully as his hand cupped her belly, caressing it gently. Tōga smiled at the sounds she was making, and continued with his efforts to please her. He had not expected the kami to bless her again so soon after the birth of their son, but who was he to question them? Everything Izayoi had she gave him willingly, and it made his heart overflow with joy to see her carry his child again, to see her turn into a divine being. And Izayoi being heavy with a child had become his favourite sight. The way her belly would swell with new life and make her body even softer and more luscious than ever before, how the scent of her fertility would enchant his senses…

His hand went deeper, reaching the most sacred spot of her body and making her gasp.

“Allow me to make you sing one more time tonight,” he whispered into her ear as he moved his fingers, much to her delight.

“Always, my love,” Izayoi breathed as he pulled her lower body towards his own and pushed her knees apart to mount her for the second time that night. Their fingers intertwined tightly as Tōga entered her, causing Izayoi to moan softly and arch her back to meet his thrusts. With each day her belly grew, and it left them no other choice but to do it this way, but neither the daiyōkai nor his beloved did mind.

Tōga was slow and gentle as he thrust into her, only his nails digging into the futon were proof of his exertion. His hand let go of Izayoi’s, moving down her body to her belly, keeping it there for support. Izayoi let out a shuddered gasp as he brushed her breasts, the mere touch of her lover almost driving her insane. Something had changed inside her since she had become pregnant again, something deep inside her that longed for nothing more but for the touch of the man she loved, and every time he did, she almost lost control over her senses.

But whatever he did, Tōga remained gentle, and his tender kisses accompanied her through her climax as she let out a deep, lustful moan.

Tōga smiled to himself and buried his face in her neck, lightly increasing the pace of his thrusts. Oh, if Izayoi had not been pregnant already, he would have asked her to give him another child, another perfect result of their love and admiration for one another. “Izayoi,” he breathed as they changed positions, and he lay down behind her with a leg wrapped around her waist. “My sweet darling Izayoi…”

Izayoi was breathing heavily, basking in the sweet tortures of his touch as he moved inside her, claiming her as his. “My beloved Tōga,” she whispered, placing her hand on top of his on her belly.

“You give me so much,” Tōga whispered into her ear. “My delicate angel…”

“Oh…” Izayoi gasped as he hit a certain spot inside her. “I… will give you all I have, my love,” she breathed. “I shall give you a child every year… if that is what you wish…”

“It is,” Tōga whispered in return. Oh, he would never get enough of her in this state, with this clear sign of his virility and strength. It was an old, feral instinct of his kind, the urge to mate and to procreate, to empty the seed into the womb of a willing female. And Izayoi was more than willing. She was the perfect partner, loyal to him in body and spirit. No other man would ever touch her, no other man would have her carry a child. There would always only be him.

“I… shall obey!” Izayoi moaned as she came a second time, tightening around her beloved and urging him to finish inside her. Her complete submission to him was what Tōga had wanted, and the beast inside him roared triumphantly as he followed her into satisfaction, growling into her neck as he spent himself deep inside her.

Neither of them spoke for a long moment as they allowed themselves to bask in the blissful afterglow of their lust. Izayoi was still breathing heavily, her chest rising and falling evenly as she recovered from his fervour. There was no woman happier that she was in this moment, in the arms of the most powerful daiyōkai that had ever lived. And he loved her. A mere human.

Was there a greater honour than that?

After a while, Tōga curled up around his woman, kissing her hair gently. Although she was only his secondary wife, he had fallen in love with her most ardently and could hardly bear to be away from her for too long. Of course, he loved the empress, too, but in a different way. She had always encouraged him to find another wife, and in Izayoi he had eventually found what he had been looking for.

“My sweet darling,” he hummed and gently cupped her breast, caressing it with his thumb.

“Hm… oh…” Izayoi mumbled and winced at his touch, so that he removed his hand immediately.

“What is wrong?” He asked, sitting up a little to see her face. “Do you not like it?”

Izayoi blushed and averted her gaze. “They ache,” she admitted. “Because I must not feed our son anymore.”

Tōga blinked in surprise. “Oh,” he said. There was little he did not know about women, but he had to admit that the bodies of young human mothers did not belong into his field of expertise. “Forgive me. I did not know.”

Izayoi reached for the duvet and pulled it up to her chest. “They do not look nice, I know,” she murmured. “As they are full of milk.”

“Eh?” Tōga frowned deeply and put his hand on her shoulder. “Don’t you ever say such a thing again, Izayoi. You are the most beautiful woman to me.” He gently grasped her hand and took away the duvet. “In every situation.”

Izayoi blushed deeply, lowering her gaze as she felt her lover’s lips on her skin.

“You always say such kind things,” she said quietly.

Tōga smiled. “What could be more beautiful to me than my wife, her belly swollen with new life and her chest full of milk for our son?” He asked, running his hand through her hair. “Believe me when I say that I find you breathtakingly beautiful.”

Izayoi shivered as she felt his strong arms around her, and before she knew it she lay on her back, with her husband hovering over her. His long, silver hair brushed her chest, causing her to shiver. And then, suddenly, he lowered his head and took her bud into his mouth.

Izayoi sighed blissfully as he relieved her of the ache in her chest, taking from her what was supposed to be for their son. But it was time that she stopped. She knew the milk would dry up soon, only to return after the birth of their second child that she would feed at her bosom again. But for now, she would allow her beloved to taste her.

He was incredibly gentle with her, and as he had finished, he licked his lips and smiled down at her. “I can say that I have never tasted something so wonderful,” he said, reaching out to stroke her cheek. “My darling.”

Izayoi smiled up at him. “Thank you. For being so gentle with me.”

Tōga chuckled and kissed her lips. “Always,” he whispered before he lay down beside her again, pulling her against him to keep her warm.

Izayoi buried her face in his chest. “I fear that the Crown Prince will not be as gentle with Lady Rin as you are with me,” she said.

Tōga hummed into her hair. “He has to learn it,” he said. “A man’s true greatness shows in his compassion for others.”

“I know,” Izayoi said, looking up at him. “But is that the right way? Through Rin? She is still so young. And she knows so very little of men. I am worried about her, my love. That is all.”

Tōga wrapped his arms around her, holding her a little closer. “I will make sure that he treats her well, Izayoi,” he said. “This stubborn son of mine will not treat the girl badly. You have my word.”

And with that, he pulled the duvet over them and ended the conversation. Izayoi understood the gesture and remained silent.

Oh, if the kami only watched over Rin, she thought. That would already be enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what you think! ^_^


	4. Becoming Someone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My internet was down yesterday, but here's the new chapter!

The Empress Yonoko was a woman one would never dare to cross.

Over the centuries, she had become the most feared and most respected woman in the realm, and her name struck horror and admiration in the hearts of her enemies. It was only natural that the Inu no Taisho had been enchanted by her the very first time they had met – and although their marriage had been an arranged one, he had been infatuated with her from the very beginning. The day she had come to the Western Palace she had demonstrated her power by throwing out those whose faces she did not like, and had rearranged the entire structure of the women’s shiro to her pleasure. Her husband had let her, respecting her as a person in her own right. To many, they were the perfect emperor and empress, the most powerful couple the world had ever seen. But Yonoko was not hungry for power. True, she enjoyed playing the role of the empress, but she preferred to spend her days in the company of the few people that she liked – or in the bed of a lover. Her husband had always been generous in his tolerance and had always chosen to condone her affairs, as long as she always remembered to whom she belonged. And oh, how could she ever forget, after giving birth to the Crown Prince?

That day, she was sprawled over a large cushion in her chambers, fanning herself lazily as a group of maids took care of her, one of them brushing her hair, another massaging her feet, and another pouring her a cup of the finest tea available. She had just left the bed and had therefore not gotten dressed yet, only wearing her light nagajuban that showed more than it actually hid. But Yonoko could not have cared less. She sighed deeply and closed her eyes, enjoying the feeling of her maids’ hands on her.

“My chest aches,” she said with a heavy sigh. “What day is it?”

“The fifth day of the ninth month, your majesty,” the maid combing her hair replied.

“Ah, that explains it, of course,” Yonoko said. “The time has come to mate, but of course, my husband finds himself to be terribly busy. Where did he spend the night?”

“In his study, Mylady,” the maid massaging her feet replied.

“Always the dutiful monarch,” Yonoko hummed, reaching for the tea and taking a small sip. “Oh, this tea is lovely. Where does it come from again?”

“From Southern China, Mylady,” the maid beside her answered. “From the Orange Mountains.”

“It is truly the best,” Yonoko said and put the cup down again. “Now, tell me, is there anything exciting happening today? Mizuki?”

“There will be a tea ceremony in the eastern gardens, Mylady,” Mizuki answered. “The nuns of the temple will perform it.”

Yonoko yawned. “How terribly boring. These nuns are so tedious. Oh well, then I will spend my day in the bath…”

Just then, the door slid open and a fourth maid came in, kneeling in front of Yonoko and bowing to her. Yonoko glanced at her briefly. “What is it?”

The woman raised her head. “The most honourable Lady Rin has stopped bleeding, your majesty,” she said. “The most honourable Lady Izayoi is with her at the moment to witness the ceremony.”

Yonoko raised a perfect eyebrow and sat up properly. “I see. I wish to get dressed now. Quickly. You will return to the healer and tell her to wait until I have joined them.”

“Yes, Mylady,” the maid said and bowed once more before she left to deliver the message to the healer.

Yonoko rose from her cushion and spread out her arms, allowing her maids to clothe her into the many layers of her kimono. Her appearance was very important to her, and she always made sure to be impeccably dressed. It was not hard – her husband spoiled her terribly, just like he spoiled Izayoi. She would find a new kimono in her closet almost every month and she would proudly present it the next day.

“I wonder,” Yonoko said as the maid wrapped an obi around her waist, “is there an idea more lunatic than the one of my husband to give a human to my son as a secondary wife? A former slave even?”

“It is a very unusual idea, indeed,” Mizuki said. She was the only maid allowed to openly answer or comment on the Empress’ utterances. “But his majesty must have had his reasons.”

“Reasons that I still try to understand,” Yonoko sighed as the other maid put her zori on her feet. “Very well. We shall see what the healer has to say about her.”

The maids stepped back and bowed lowly to her as the empress walked past them and out of the room, moving like a goddess as she walked down the hallway towards the gates. Oh, sometimes it was hard to find entertainment in the palace, but with the arrival of the girl, life at court had become a tad more interesting.

*******

Izayoi had immediately come to Rin’s bedchamber that morning. A maid had come to her room as she had played with her little boy, telling her that the sheet around Rin’s waist had been clean that morning. Knowing that Rin would be terrified without her, she had come to her instantly to be with her during the ceremony. She had promised her to stay at her side, and she would keep her word. And so, she sat beside Rin, patting her hand gently as the healer took a closer look at Rin’s facial features and teeth.

The question of Rin’s age had remained unanswered, and so, Izayoi had asked the healer if there were ways to determine it at least to some degree. The healer, an incredibly ancient seeming woman named Fumiyo with pointy ears and green stripes on her cheeks, had not been able to promise anything, but that she would at least try. And so, Rin sat still as the old woman examined her teeth.

“It would help very much if she spoke, Mylady,” she said to Izayoi.

“Lady Rin is very shy, you see,” Izayoi explained softly. “Surely you can examine her without her needing to speak?”

“Of course I can, Mylady,” Fumiyo said. “Now may I just…”

The door slid open and as Izayoi turned around to look past the curtain, she saw the Empress herself enter the room and take a seat behind the curtain, clasping her hands on her lap. “Do continue,” she said as she fanned herself lazily, studying the shocked Rin with her golden eyes as one of the maids opened the curtain a little to offer the empress a better view.

Izayoi squeezed Rin’s hand reassuringly and watched as Rin was undressed and the yukata taken away to be washed. Yonoko tilted her head to the left, watching with interest as the healer began to examine the girl’s chest with her old, bony hands while being as gentle as possible. She had to admit that the girl was pretty despite being a little underfed. But that was nothing a good diet could not fix. She was smaller than Kagura and her hips were broader, but even Yonoko could tell that this was not quite the body of a grown woman.

“They have a good shape,” Yonoko remarked, glancing at Izayoi. “Would you not agree?”

Izayoi nodded. “I agree, your majesty. Like a ripe fruit.”

“Indeed,” Yonoko hummed. “Oh dear, look how she blushes! Now, that truly is not a reason to be embarrassed, Lady Rin. You must learn to accept compliments.”

Rin had indeed blushed all over at the comments of the other women. She had never paid much attention to her body, unlike the people at the slave markets. She tensed at the memory, but fortunately, Izayoi saw it. She gently rubbed Rin’s back soothingly.

“Everything is fine, yes?” She said softly. “You must forgive Lady Rin. She does not have the best memories about healers.”

Fumiyo nodded. “I was not offended, Mylady,” she said as she moved a little closer and pushed Rin’s long hair out of the way to take a look at her back. Rin squeezed her eyes shut, letting out a whimper as they revealed her greatest shame.

Long, thin scars ornamented her pale back; the clear results of a lashing. The wounds had healed well, but they had left visible scars that would most likely never disappear. She had received them a long time ago after dropping an expensive vase in the house of her master. Back then, she had only been a child, but her mistress had not cared about that. Only when Rin had fainted she had stopped. That night, her master had called for a healer, who had taken care of her wounds. A few weeks later, they had sold her again.

“What is going on?” Yonoko asked as she could not see what was happening.

“It is nothing,” Izayoi and Fumiyo said simultaneously and covered Rin’s back with her hair again. There were things not everyone needed to know. Not even the empress.

“Well, then continue,” Yonoko said. “My time is valuable, you see.”

Rin swallowed thickly, holding tightly onto Izayoi’s hand. Somehow, the older woman understood her without needing her to say a word, and in this moment, she could not have been more grateful for her. Perhaps the kami had sent Izayoi to her, to be her guardian angel, to lead her through this minefield that the palace seemed to be. Izayoi understood the gesture, and she smiled encouragingly at Rin as the healer continued with the examination. At her request she leant back a little, and just as Fumiyo pushed her knees apart Izayoi put a blanket around Rin’s shoulders to cover her at least a little.

“She is very tense,” Fumiyo said as she put her hand on Rin’s thigh. “I cannot examine her this way.”

“Rin-chan?” Izayoi said and moved a little closer to her. “Fumiyo-sensei needs to relax for this part of the examination. I promise that this is nothing bad. I have had this examination as well, remember? And now look at me. Even her highness has gone through this ceremony.”

Yonoko raised an eyebrow as Izayoi mentioned her, but she nodded lightly. Oh well, if it helped the girl.

“Even Kagura had this examination,” Izayoi added. “Just like every girl that is going to marry in the West. It is an honourable affair, only to see if you are healthy.”

Fumiyo patted Rin’s knee. “You have been to slave markets, Lady Rin?” She asked calmly.

Rin looked at the old woman with wide eyes, swallowing thickly as she thought of the hands of the northern healers, of the greedy customers that had pretended to be interested in her just to catch a glimpse of what was beneath her skirt. It had been the most humiliating experience of her life.

“I can imagine what they did to you there, Lady Rin,” the old woman said. “But my profession has nothing to do with that. I am a healer. My profession is to help people. To help women to know themselves and their bodies, so that they may live long and happy lives and give birth to their children safely. The West does not define the value of a woman by taking a look at what is between her legs. We value intelligence, honesty, and wit. I wish to help you to begin a new life in the West, a life in dignity. I do not wish to cause you pain.”

Yonoko had stopped fanning herself, watching curiously as Rin, with half-spread legs, seemed to slowly understand that she was not being treated like cattle in this palace. To be in the care of the famous Fumiyo, who could heal almost everything easily, was a great honour. But of course the girl would not know that. What Rin seemed to need was the reassurance of others that no one would harm her. Yonoko could hardly blame her for being cautious. She did not even want to imagine what the girl had gone through.

Just as Izayoi opened her mouth to speak, Rin nodded, and she leant back once more, resting on her lower arms as she took deep, even breaths to relax. Fumiyo waited patiently, her old hands slowly running over Rin’s thigh before they eventually moved deeper. To Izayoi’s surprise, Rin did not even wince as the woman pushed two fingers into her and pressed her other hand on Rin’s stomach. Yonoko corrected her posture, craning her neck to get a better view of the examination. But it was over before Rin even knew what was happening. Fumiyo withdrew her hands and washed them in a bowl before she spoke again.

“The Lady Rin is untouched, it seems,” she said. “You have been very lucky, regarding your previous life. Am I correct?”

Rin closed her legs again and nodded. It was true, no man had ever had his way with her. In that sense she had been lucky indeed.

“Oh?” Yonoko said and raised her eyebrows in surprise. “She has not been deflowered yet?”

“No, Mylady,” Fumiyo confirmed. “A fact that should please his highness the Crown Prince very much.”

“Ah, I wouldn’t be too sure about that,” Yonoko said and grabbed her fan again. “I would not exactly call him fond of unexperienced women.”

“But that shall be none of your concern,” Izayoi said quickly to Rin and rubbed her back. “Well done, Rin! Now let’s get you dressed!”

And with that, the ceremony was over, and as Rin was getting dressed, Fumiyo gave Yonoko and Izayoi a detailed report of her findings. Rin listened from behind the partition as the maids put her into a heavy kimono and combed her hair as if she were a doll for a princess.

“The Lady Rin is completely healthy, only a little underfed,” Fumiyo said. “If she eats enough she will gain weight quickly. Regarding her age it is clear that she is not quite a woman yet. I dare to say she is no day older than seventeen. Her body still lacks its typical womanly shape, but I am sure that will follow very soon – especially if she bears his imperial highness a child. Then she will blossom, just like the Lady Izayoi.”

Seventeen. She was seventeen. Now that she knew it, she did not feel any different, but it felt good to have something else to add to the list of things that defined her. She was not a nameless slave anymore. No, her name was Rin, which meant Dignity. She was seventeen years old and healthy, and she had a husband and a family-in-law.

“I am someone,” Rin whispered.

The maids paused, looking at each other, and the other women in the room had heard it, too.

“Did you say something, dear?” Izayoi asked, rising and pushing back the curtain. Rin stood before her, impeccably dressed in a beautiful kimono that reflected her high social standing and a comb in her hair for ornamental purposes.

“I am someone,” she said again, her voice hardly more than a faint whisper, but it was there. And she smiled.

*******

The little prince was the pride and joy of not only his mother, but also of his father. The Inu no Taisho had been with many women over the course of the centuries, but for a long time, only his wife had given him a child. That had various reasons. For one, Tōga was rather picky when it came to the women he shared his bed with. Unlike his father, he preferred to look after the women he already had instead of constantly looking for another and fathering offspring as a result. Furthermore, he had been away from court for a very long time and had fought alongside his men for the peace in his realm. Now that a peaceful time had come to the West, he was finally able to enjoy the private aspects of his life. He had seduced many women in his long life, but none of them had been as enchanting as Izayoi, and so, none of them had given him children – thanks to the skilled healers at his court. But with Izayoi, it was different. With her, he had longed for another son, for another proof of his virility and strength. The empress had made it quite clear after Sesshōmaru’s birth that she had done her duty and did not wish to endure another pregnancy – a wish that Tōga had always respected. Izayoi, however, was the complete opposite. She loved the sound of tiny feet toddling across the floor, and she was a born mother. The day Inuyasha had been born, Tōga had felt the gods’ divine touch on them.

And so, he never missed a chance to spend time with the little boy. Inuyasha had grown a lot and had finally begun to walk, although his first attempts had been anything but successful. But now, he managed to take a few steps on his own, and Tōga cheered on him each time he tried.

After a long day in his study, Tōga had gone to visit Izayoi and their son in her private garden. She had been overjoyed to see him, and she leant against him as they watched their son play with his small wooden horses. It was an adorable sight to his parents.

“How is the little one today?” Tōga asked, placing his large hand on Izayoi’s growing belly.

“Calm,” Izayoi hummed. “Not like Inuyasha.”

“Then it must be a girl, surely,” Tōga hummed, kissing her cheek.

“Would a girl disappoint you, my love?” Izayoi asked.

“Eh? Not at all,” Tōga assured her. “A little girl to love and spoil. Would that not be nice?”

Izayoi laughed softly. “Indeed, it would be nice.”

She shifted a little in his arms, wincing as his arm was pushed against her breasts. This time, he noticed her discomfort immediately. “Do they still ache?”

“A little,” Izayoi sighed. “But the midwife said that it will stop soon. Inuyasha cried terribly this morning when he had to drink from the wet nurse. It broke my heart.”

Tōga kissed her hair. “He will get used to it, my love. Soon he will not even notice the difference anymore.”

Izayoi nodded. She knew he was right, and that it was for the best. Her milk would soon be needed for their second child, after all. She put her hand on her stomach, smiling softly as the baby turned inside her, only to settle again peacefully. If the gods were with her, she would give Tōga a child every year, and Inuyasha would have lots of siblings to play with.

“I heard that Lady Rin had her ceremony yesterday?” Tōga asked eventually. “Did it go well?”

“Oh, yes,” Izayoi nodded. “She is perfectly healthy. The healer said she is probably no day older than seventeen. A good age, I think.”

“Indeed, a very good age for a young wife,” Tōga agreed, chuckling as Inuyasha rolled onto his back.

“And she has never been touched,” Izayoi added.

“She has not been deflowered?” Tōga exclaimed.

“Shh!” Izayoi chuckled. “You don’t need to shout it from the rooftops!”

“She has not been deflowered?” Tōga said again, in a normal tone this time. “That is surprising in regard to her past. Not that I hoped that she had been inappropriately touched-“

“I know what you mean,” Izayoi assured him. “But it worries me. She knows so little of men and the one she has been given to is Sesshōmaru, of all people…”

Tōga had to admit that Izayoi had a point. Sesshōmaru was not one of those men that would be happy about an untouched wife. He would see it as a tedious task instead.

“I will speak to him when he returns,” Tōga said. “No harm will come to her.”

“You see, not everyone can be as gentle as you, my love,” Izayoi said, looking up at her beloved. “I will never forget the night you came to my room and asked me to give myself to you. I never regretted it.”

Tōga smirked. “You were a pure blossom back then. You were so incredibly shy.”

“And because I was shy you were incredibly gentle with me,” Izayoi said with a smile. “I felt no pain. I was only a little sore the next day.”

“I apologise for that,” Tōga hummed and nuzzled her hair, just as Inuyasha let out a squeak and said: “Mama!”

Izayoi gasped and sat up properly. “Oh my! Did you hear that?”

“I heard it!” Tōga said excitedly as Izayoi reached for their son, who beamed at them as if it was the best day of his life. “Well done! That is my boy! So smart!”

“He said Mama!” Izayoi squealed and cuddled her baby boy. Inuyasha squeaked and held out his little hands for his mother.

“Mama! Mama!”

“When will he say Papa?” Tōga asked excitedly. “Inuyasha, can you say Papa?”

“Mama!” The little boy babbled, smiling at his parents. “Mama!”

Tōga sighed. “Well, not today, then,” he said, ruffling his son’s hair. “Come. Let us go back inside. It will be time for dinner soon.”

Izayoi nodded and rose, holding Inuyasha close to her chest as she followed her husband inside. The guards and servants stepped aside as the couple walked past them towards their rooms as one of Tōga’s advisors of many years rushed towards them and bowed lowly to them.

“Your majesty!” he breathed, quickly kneeling to his sovereign. “Your majesty! The Crown Prince has been seen near the capital!”

Tōga and Izayoi exchanged a look, and before Izayoi could say anything, Tōga kissed her hand. “It seems that he will meet his new wife very soon,” he said. “This is going to be… interesting.”


	5. Father and Son

The moment Sesshōmaru set foot into palace he knew that something was different.

However, the Crown Prince could not tell what it was. Perhaps it was the way the soldiers greeted him at the gates, as if they were afraid of losing their heads the next second. Oh, well, a little respect would do them good.

Perhaps it was the way the noble ladies looked at him and greeted him as he walked past them. Usually, they would greet him with bright smiles and throw passionate glances at him, hoping that he would show interest in one of them despite the fact he had never done so. He had never called for one of them at night, as he regarded the keeping of a concubine or mistress as a tedious matter. In the very few nights he longed for a female, he would go to the bedchamber of his wife.

But this time, their greeting was different. They still smiled at him, but there was curiosity in their eyes, as if they were wondering how he would react to something specific. The Crown Prince huffed, ignoring the women as he walked past them through the main courtyard towards the inner quarters where his father had his study.

Sesshōmaru would have found the way blindfolded. As a young boy he had already been sent to his father and his advisors to learn the art of governing. Over the centuries he had learnt everything there was to know and he had gained the trust of the Emperor. Now he almost functioned as his father’s right hand, taking over the affairs that needed the monarch’s attention outside of the capital. The Crown Prince had accepted these duties gladly. They allowed him to leave the palace whenever he pleased without having to justify his actions to his father in great detail.

The politicians on the hallways quickly moved out of the way as he entered the Imperial quarters, all of them bowing their heads to him as he walked past them towards his father’s study. His father was as reliable as a fine clockwork. At this time of the day he was always to be found in the company of his small army of advisors, all of them trying to outsmart each other while his father patiently listened and made decisions for wellbeing and safety of his people. The prince could hear their mindless chatter as he approached the doors, and he forced himself not to roll his eyes as he waited for the servant by the doors to open them for him.

“The stability of that region is at stake, you moron of a general!” Someone shouted.

“Your majesty,” Sesshōmaru said, his voice clear and firm. “I most humbly ask you for your permission to enter.”

The people inside fell silent, a clear sign that his father had raised his hand.

“You may.”

The servant opened the door and Sesshōmaru entered the study of his father, approaching his desk and going down to one knee, lowering his head. “I have returned, your majesty.”

Tōga nodded and waved dismissively with his hand, sending his advisors out. They quickly collected their papers and left the room, but not without throwing a last glance at the Crown Prince. It had been a while since they had last seen him, but from what they could tell he did not seem to be injured.

Only as the doors closed again Sesshōmaru raised his head, looking his father in the eye. The hierarchy between them had always been clear and had never been questioned. The prince honoured and respected his father and followed his command. In return, Tōga granted his eldest son the freedoms no crown prince had ever possessed before, and trusted him. Sesshōmaru was smart enough not to take this trust for granted. His father was still the most powerful daiyōkai that had ever walked the earth, and only a fool would dare to cross him.

“I am glad to see you again, son,” Tōga said and walked around the table. “You were gone for four months this time. I hope you have been well.”

It was typical for his father to first inquire about his son, and then about the reason he had sent him away for. Sesshōmaru huffed internally. Of course he had been well.

“This Sesshōmaru has no enemy in these lands that he could not easily fight, Chichiue.”

Tōga smirked. “It is best to not have enemies at all,” he said. “But those that we have, and those that remain, must be observed carefully.”

He took a seat at his desk and allowed his son to come closer. Sesshōmaru followed him to his desk and sat down on the cushion an advisor had left behind, beginning with his report. “The panther yōkai in the east have claimed the land for themselves,” he said. “Of course they did so illegally, as we expected. But as it turned out a group of wolf yōkai had claimed the land before them, and a group of bat yōkai claimed it before them. Their arguments were the cause for the unrest in the region at the cost of several human lives.”

Tōga nodded thoughtfully, rubbing his forehead. “Yes. I had expected such a thing already.”

“I managed to separate them, as you told me,” Sesshōmaru continued. “The wolf yōkai came back after a few days. It seems that their leader lost control over the pack and their new leader had chosen to attack the human villages in order to expand the territory. They were defeated by our troops and the men of Kumada Ginta.”

“Kumada sent his men?” Tōga raised an eyebrow. “What does he hope to receive in return?”

“I asked myself the same question, Chichiue,” Sesshōmaru nodded. “I followed him to his estate and found out that he was gathering riches from the people on his lands in order to fund an expansion of his private army. It took me less than half an hour to find the man he was collaborating with. Kumada had been planning to take over the Himura clan.”

“The Himura clan?” Tōga repeated, his eyes widening. “Has he lost his mind? Only a fool would try to attack the Himura clan, no matter the size of the army.”

Sesshōmaru huffed. “Of course he had lost his mind. It was his wife who eventually turned against him and approached me. Kumada’s wife told me that her husband wanted to make Himura’s sister his wife, but Himura refused as his sister was already engaged.”

“Oh, kami,” Tōga sighed, shaking his head.

“Kumada was executed the same night by General Obata,” Sesshōmaru added. “Until his son comes of age his mother will lead the clan.”

Tōga sighed deeply and folded his arms. Only a fool would say that humans were less complicated than yōkai. The motives always were the same, regardless of the race of a man. Deep down, they were all the same. “I know Lady Kumada,” he said eventually. “A strong woman. Feared, even. I will send a messenger to her. She shall know that the Kumada clan is expected to pledge allegiance to the throne next Spring.”

“I already told her so, Chichiue,” Sesshōmaru replied. “Lady Kumada has accepted and sends the sword of her husband as a sign of submission.”

Tōga nodded. “Good. At least that has been resolved,” he murmured. “Your mother will be glad to see you, son. She has been asking for you twice.”

Sesshōmaru’s mouth twitched. His mother hardly asked for him, and he knew that his father was lying to him this very moment, but for some reason, the emperor tried to apply human standards to their family. But that would never work. Female yōkai did not care much for their offspring once the children had reached a certain age.

“I shall visit her then,” he said, inclining his head to his father. “I hope that there have been no disturbances while I was away.”

Tōga shook his head. “No, not at all. Only pleasant news. Lady Izayoi is with child again, for example.”

Lady Izayoi. The woman that had once been the plaything of his late grandmother. Before his father had cast an eye on her Sesshōmaru had not even known she existed. But for some reason only the gods knew, his sire had become infatuated with her, and had made her his second wife after sharing the bed with her only once. Lady Izayoi was immensely popular at court and among the ordinary people, and not even Sesshōmaru could deny that she was extraordinarily beautiful. First, his half-brother Inuyasha had been born, and now it seemed there would be a second sibling in the near future.

It was not as if he would have cared.

What his father did in his spare time – and with whom – was none of his business.

“Allow me to congratulate you, Chichiue,” Sesshōmaru said, bowing his head again. “These are very good news.”

“Thank you,” Tōga said with a small smile. “Lady Izayoi has asked about you several times as well. I hope you will visit her too. Inuyasha has just begun to speak and walk.”

Sesshōmaru nodded. As if the hanyō was of any interest to him. “He will surely do you credit and bring you honour, Chichiue.”

“Ah, son!” Tōga sighed and patted Sesshōmaru’s shoulder heartily. “You will understand the joys of fatherhood when you become one yourself. Kagura will be pleased about your return. I hope that you will do your duties and spend some of your time with her, as a good husband should.”

“I will, Chichiue,” Sesshōmaru nodded. It was not that he did not like Kagura. In fact, he had learnt to not underestimate her the moment she had managed to cut his cheek with her powers as a wind sorceress after a particularly harsh comment of his towards her. She was smarter than she seemed and something about her he found quite intriguing – but being with her just for the sake of deepening a bond they did not share seemed a waste of time to him.

“Good.” Tōga said with a smile. “And it is a pleasure for me to tell you that I have decided to give you a second wife. She has already moved into the women’s shiro and is currently under the care of Lady Izayoi. You will surely get to meet Lady Rin when you go to see your brother.”

Sesshōmaru stared at his father for a little too long to be still considered polite, but he pulled himself together before his father could reprimand him for it, and he cleared his throat. Had he understood him correctly?

“A… a second wife, Chichiue?” He repeated with a small frown. “Forgive me, but I do not understand. I do not need a second wife.”

Tōga sighed, shaking his head. “Son, in all honesty, no man truly needs a second wife. But in many cases, they are wanted. This is why I married Lady Izayoi. And I firmly believe that it is high time for you to bethink yourself of what is expected of you in this palace. As my son and heir, it is your duty to make sure this family continues to exist. My father, grandfather, and those before them have ensured the name of the house of the West by taking wives and having children, and it is time that you find your place among them.”

Sesshōmaru closed his eyes for a moment, suppressing his anger. “Chichiue,” he said calmly. “I already have a wife. Princess Kagura will bear an heir to the Western throne.”

“I do not doubt that she will, son,” Tōga said calmly. “But it is only appropriate that you take a second wife. Remember where you stand, and what you embody.”

Deep down, Sesshōmaru knew that it was useless to argue. His father had already made his decision and he had to comply, regardless of what he thought. He did not need another wife, another woman to be responsible for. But there was nothing he could do about it. Despite being a prince – he was also his father’s subject. And he had to obey.

“I will do as you wish, Chichiue,” Sesshōmaru murmured eventually. “The name of the woman is unknown to me, however. Is Lady Rin the daughter of a concubine or of lower nobility?”

Tōga shook his head. “She is a human slave that was given to me by the messenger of the North as a gift. Giving her a new life was the least I could do.”

“A human?!” Sesshōmaru’s eyes widened. “You gave me a human woman?”

“The fact that you find this the most disturbing aspect is insulting,” Tōga said with a deep frown. “Lady Rin is indeed human, and she deserves to live a life in dignity.”

“But Chichiue!” Sesshōmaru exclaimed. “I cannot-“

“You WILL treat the girl with the respect that she deserves!” Tōga barked. “I have enough of your attitude towards the human population! Do not think that I do not see the way you look at Lady Izayoi! It is high time that you learn humility! Being a yōkai does not make you any better in the eyes of the kami! The ones whose wrath you should fear!”

Tōga rose from his cushion and walked around the desk, reaching for his sword and armour. “You will be a good husband to Lady Rin and treat her with nothing but kindness. You will be gentle, patient, and compassionate with her in every situation. A woman that has not been deflowered yet must be treated with the greatest care. Is that understood?”

Sesshōmaru exhaled deeply, keeping his gaze lowered as his father spoke.

“Yes.”

“Yes, what?”

“Yes, your majesty.”

“Good.”

Tōga put on his armour and went to the door. “Remember to visit your mother,” he said. “She is the one who brought you into this world.”

And with that, he was gone.

Sesshōmaru let out a frustrated growl, throwing one of the inkpots against the wall on his way out. Another wife, a human wife even, was the last thing he needed at the moment. He had enough to do with Kagura. He did not have the time to take care of another woman, one that would actually need his protection and care due to her weak human nature. A human! How could his father give him a human as a wife!

How pathetic.

“Well, if that isn’t his royal highness!”

Sesshōmaru turned around in the archway and saw his father’s youngest and most powerful general approach him. He was one of the very few faces that did not bother him upon first sight, and he nodded at him in greeting as he came closer. “Kenshin.”

The young general grinned and came to stand in front of him, crossing his arms. “I just heard that you returned. It’s good to see you again. The palace has been boring without you.”

“I doubt that you had much time of leisure,” Sesshōmaru said, clasping his hands on his back. “After my father promoted you.”

“Yes, I was rather busy,” Kenshin nodded. “With the ladies, if you know what I mean.” He laughed and heartily patted Sesshōmaru’s back. “I heard your father shout at you.”

Sesshōmaru huffed and continued to walk. “It was not the first time he shouted, if you remember.”

Kenshin chuckled. “Yes, that is true. Do you remember when you tried to steal his sword and dropped it on the way out?”

Of all people, Kenshin was the only one that was allowed to speak so freely to him. The bond they shared was a unique one, as Sesshōmaru’s wet nurse had been Kenshin’s mother. They had grown up together and as they had come of age, they had both pledged their allegiance to the Emperor on the same day. Sesshōmaru trusted Kenshin. Although he had always preferred to not speak about his feelings and hardly told anyone about the things that bothered him, Kenshin always seemed to know if there was something wrong with him.

“If I remember correctly, it was you who dropped the sword and broke a 3000-year-old vase,” Sesshōmaru replied, raising an eyebrow.

“Right,” Kenshin hummed. “Good old times. So, I assume that your father told you about your new wife?”

“Indeed,” Sesshōmaru muttered. “It is entirely unnecessary. I already have a wife.”

“True,” Kenshin agreed. “But you should have been there. I thought your father was going to rip the man’s throat out. And the girl was shaking like a leaf. I wonder what made him choose her as a wife for you.”

“I can tell you what it was,” Sesshōmaru said as they left the Imperial quarters. “His pathetic fondness for human women.”

They walked across the courtyard towards the inner chambers, the very rooms that belonged to the Imperial family. Only a selected few, such as maids, servants, as well as relatives and close friends were allowed to enter this part of the palace. The inner chambers were divided into a shiro for the women and a shiro for the Emperor and Empress as well as apartments for the Crown Prince. Sometimes, Sesshōmaru would not leave these rooms for days and the courtiers would wonder if he was actually spending time with his wife. Every now and then, that was actually the case. But most of the time, he remained in his rooms simply in order to avoid courtly life.

“I would not call it pathetic,” Kenshin said as they entered the inner chambers together. “But it is true, his majesty has a weakness for humans. Which makes him very popular, you have to admit.”

“Hm.” Sesshōmaru’s expression darkened even more. It was true that his father was immensely popular among the humans in the West, and that taking Lady Izayoi as his wife had only added to that. What was his father’s plan? Did he intend to increase his popularity by giving him a human wife?

Kenshin seemed to read Sesshōmaru’s mind as he spoke. “I don’t think he applies his own standards to you, Sesshōmaru. Only a fool would try to attempt such a thing.”

“I am not my father,” Sesshōmaru said, opening the gates to his mother’s garden.

It was a place he did not visit often. As a child, he had spent most of his time in the care of the concubines of his father or in the company of his teachers. Every now and then his mother had called for him, and then he would stand before her in this garden while she fanned herself and asked him all sorts of questions.

Now, the dynamics had slightly changed. Whenever she wanted to see him, she would come to his chambers instead. Only on very rare occasions he would come to this place – when his father told him to, or when he needed his mother’s advice. But that was rarely the case.

This Sesshōmaru did not need advice.

“She is not here,” he said, stopping in the archway. There was no trace of the Empress in these halls, and as Sesshōmaru closed his eyes and tried to locate her, he realised that she had left the palace completely.

Kenshin shrugged, following Sesshōmaru on his way out. “I assume she has gone out for a hunt.”

Sesshōmaru huffed. “Who knows. The only reason she wishes to see me is to lecture me about the latest developments.”

“Well, you cannot blame her for being curious,” Kenshin reminded him as they made their way down the hallway. “Everyone is.”

“I can see that,” Sesshōmaru murmured, briefly glancing at his mother’s ladies-in-waiting that were walking past them and nosily looking at him from behind their fans. “I sensed it the moment I returned.”

“They wonder how you will react,” Kenshin said. “And to be honest, I wonder, too.”

They stopped at the steps that led into the garden, and Kenshin crossed his arms, looking up at his friend. Sesshōmaru was taller than he was, and stronger, too, but the young general had never submitted to him. He always said what he thought, and he would not back down. Not even when it came to such a delicate matter. _Especially_ not in such a delicate matter. Sesshōmaru had never shown much interest in women, and although he got along with Princess Kagura fairly well, Kenshin knew that Sesshōmaru’s condemnation of the fairer sex was partly due to the fact he simply did not know how to deal with women.

“When was the last time you really wanted to impress a woman?” Kenshin asked with a knowing smile.

Sesshōmaru scowled at him. “This Sesshōmaru has no time for courtship.”

Just then the bright laughter of a woman reached their ears, and as they turned their heads, they spotted Lady Izayoi under a tree, playing with one of the cats that lived in the palace. Their eyes met, and Sesshōmaru sighed internally.

“I should get it over with, I suppose,” he said to Kenshin and descended the stairs, walking through the garden towards the woman. If beauty was everything she had to offer in order to entice his father, then Sesshōmaru had to admit she was doing it rather well. Lady Izayoi was in fact one of the most beautiful human women he had ever seen, and he had to admit that she could easily compete with the naturally beautiful demonesses.

“Sesshōmaru-sama,” Izayoi said with a bright smile, bowing her head to him in greeting. “How wonderful it is to see you again. I hope you had a pleasant journey.”

“Lady Izayoi.” Sesshōmaru clasped his hands on his back, looking down at the woman. “It is good to see you again as well. I heard that congratulations are in order.”

Izayoi beamed at him and gently rubbed her swollen belly. “Thank you,” she said. “His majesty is very happy, and so am I.”

There was something that Sesshōmaru had disliked about Izayoi from the very beginning, and that was the genuine kindness she showed to everyone, regardless of their upbringing or social standing. She always treated him as if he were her son, despite his purposefully cold attitude towards her.

“Have you visited Kagura yet?” Izayoi asked. “She was watching the skies many times, waiting for your return. She will be very happy to see you.”

“I will see her tonight,” Sesshōmaru replied as a young woman came down the stairs. In her arms, she carried Izayoi’s son, gently bouncing him on her hip. At his sight she stopped in her tracks, and her eyes widened in shock.

Sesshōmaru raised an eyebrow.

Izayoi cleared her throat. “Sesshōmaru-sama, may I introduce you to Lady Rin?”

The moment Izayoi spoke the girl dropped to her knees, placing the boy on the floor as she bowed to him and lowered her head respectfully, like a servant waiting for the master’s punishment.

Lady Rin.

The woman that his father had chosen for him as a wife.

She seemed fairly handsome for a human that had been a slave not long ago, and the way she bowed to him showed that she had not accustomed to her new life yet. If she had made any effort to prepare for his arrival, she would have known how to greet him; by meeting his gaze and bowing only lightly. But the woman behaved like a servant.

Sesshōmaru knew he had to acknowledge her, at least. His father would hear from Lady Izayoi about their first meeting, without any doubt.

“There is no need to kneel to me, Lady Rin,” he said calmly. “A wife does not kneel before her husband.”

As the girl did not move, Lady Izayoi nudged her gently. “You must forgive her, Sesshōmaru-sama, she is very shy,” she said. “This is an entirely new situation for her. She will soon become accustomed to our ways, I am sure.”

“I see.” Sesshōmaru said as Rin finally sat up but kept her gaze fixed on her lap. Shyness was merely another word for naivety and simplicity, he thought. Only the mindless had nothing to say.

And those that could not bear to meet his gaze were weak.

It was a truth that Sesshōmaru had acknowledged a long time ago. The weak and simple-minded were a waste of time; time that he did not have. But there was no way to get rid of her – he had to accept this woman as his secondary wife whether he liked it or not. It was his father’s command, and as his son and subject, he had to obey.

“There are matters that require my attention,” Sesshōmaru said. “I wish you a pleasant afternoon.”

Izayoi nodded, pulling her son onto her lap. “Of course. Say goodbye to your brother, Inuyasha!”

The child babbled happily, chewing on his hand as he looked up at Sesshōmaru in complete innocence.

Sesshōmaru inclined his head to the women as he turned around and walked away, joining Kenshin, who had been waiting for him patiently by the stairs. The young general greeted Izayoi with a nod and quickly followed Sesshōmaru who was already on his way out.

“You have to admit she is pretty,” he said. “Many men would kill for a wife like Lady Rin.”

“Don’t be daft, Kenshin,” Sesshōmaru huffed as they turned around the corner and exited the shiro through the opposite door. “What am I supposed to do with a wife that does not speak?”

Izayoi sighed at the last comment, and she instinctively reached for Rin’s hand. Of course the girl had heard it, too, even if it had not been Sesshōmaru’s intention.

“Give it time,” Izayoi said softly. “And love will come.”

A small tear rolled down Rin’s cheek, but she nodded, even if it was just for Izayoi’s sake. Deep down, she knew that the prince was right. She meant nothing.

Oh, if she could only come out of her shell! But the fear in her heart forced her to remain silent, and she doubted that the Crown Prince possessed the patience that she needed.

He did not want her. It was as simple as that.


	6. Discovery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short chapter this time!

The rain gently pattered on the roof of the women’s shiro, lulling those living in it peacefully to sleep. Only Kagura was awake that night, watching the rain dance on the patio and the tiny drops fall from the leaves of the bushes that framed the garden that she called her sanctuary. It was her favourite place in the palace – a place where she could breathe, where she could feel the wind in her hair and imagine a sense of freedom that she no longer had. That she had never had, if she was being honest. From the moment she was born she had been prepared for this life, for the role as the wife of the Crown Prince. One day, she would be his Empress. It was a future that many women would have killed for. For Kagura, it was merely a consequence of her marriage.

She could feel her husband stir lightly in his sleep behind her, and she threw a glance over her shoulder. A sleeping Sesshōmaru was a mesmerising sight that almost seemed unnatural. A man like him never seemed to sleep. But there he was, his chest slowly rising and falling. He looked incredibly fragile like this, but Kagura was no fool. In any case of danger, he would wake instantly and turn into the powerful demon that he was.

Kagura sighed and pulled the duvet closer around her body, closing her eyes. She hardly got to see him these days. He often roamed his father’s lands on a mission and spent very little time at the palace. And when he was home he often locked himself into his study and did not leave it again for days. She as his wife was not one of his priorities.

It was almost morning when she felt Sesshōmaru stir again, and as Kagura looked up she saw him stand next to the futon completely bare, reaching for his clothes that he had left behind on the floor.

“You are leaving already?” Kagura asked, sitting up and the duvet slipped from her chest.

“Yes,” Sesshōmaru said as he put on his hakama. “There are other things I need to take care of.”

Kagura huffed. “I thought you would spend the night with me.”

“I have.”

“It is still dark outside, Sesshōmaru,” Kagura said with a deep sigh. “You should get more rest.”

“I have slept enough,” Sesshōmaru replied and threw his hair over his shoulder. “Sleep for as long as you wish. There is no need to get up as well.”

Kagura rolled her eyes and ran a hand through her hair. “And what is it you have to take care of?” She asked.

Sesshōmaru glanced at her over his shoulder. “I do not believe that this is any of your business,” he said, but he did not sound as if he wished to reprimand her.

Kagura sighed and lay down again. “Are you going to her now?”

Sesshōmaru frowned in confusion, turning around to her. “To whom?”

Kagura huffed. “To your other wife,” he said. “You must be dying to taste her.”

Sesshōmaru raised an eyebrow. “Don’t be daft,” he said. “I have no interest in her. And besides, I did not think you, of all people, would be jealous of her. A human woman. One that does not even speak.” He adjusted his clothing and made his way to the door. “Jealousy does not suit you, Kagura.”

Kagura did not reply, staring up at the ceiling as she heard him walk away. Was she jealous? No. She would certainly not be jealous of a human woman that her husband was not even interested in. What she wanted, however, was his attention, and of that she received very little. But then again, Sesshōmaru hardly paid attention to anyone except for his father. He deeply admired him and was his most loyal servant.

The human girl was just another victim of his ignorance.

*******

Two months had passed since Rin’s arrival at the palace, and Izayoi was more than glad that after some time, the girl had decided to speak.

It was not much that she said, but every now and then, she would give short, quiet answers. Most of the time, she remained as silent as she had always been. But Izayoi did not mind. She enjoyed Rin’s company immensely, also because she was another human woman in the same position. They had quickly become close friends and Izayoi trusted her with taking care of Inuyasha when she was busy. The little boy had quickly become attached to the girl and squealed in delight whenever he saw her. And whenever Rin got to spend time with him, she seemed to come out of her shell a little more.

Izayoi had learnt quickly that for now, she did not have to worry about Sesshōmaru. He was not interested in Rin at the moment and he certainly would not change his mind anytime soon. For that, she knew him too well. But that gave her the opportunity to teach Rin about her new life in the palace in peace and quiet without having to worry about her wellbeing. It was hard enough for the daughters of noble families to settle into such a life, but for Rin, it seemed almost impossible. But only at the first glance: Rin was eager to learn, and soon, she had made visible progress. Now she knew when to bow and to whom, when it was appropriate to speak and when she should remain silent, and everyone agreed that despite her upbringing, Rin possessed a certain elegance.

However, Rin found it hard to get used to the life of nobility. While the men seemed to follow their duties at court, the women seemed to do nothing all day except for playing games and taking walks through the gardens. Rin had worked hard her whole life as a slave and therefore, she found herself becoming restless very soon. Izayoi tried her best to keep her busy, but she had soon realised that Rin would not find happiness this way. She could not always have her look after Inuyasha like a second mother, and sitting around reciting poetry while waiting for the next meal would do more harm than good, in her opinion.

Rin, however, had begun to keep herself entertained on her own. Whenever Izayoi was busy, she wandered through the palace, exploring the different corners and wings. Many times, she was in the company of the cat that lived in the women’s shiro. She was not sure if it was allowed to enter certain parts of the pace, but so far, no one had ever stopped her. Wherever she went the guards would get out of the way and let her pass.

Only the curiosity of the courtiers bothered her, and she always lowered her head as much as she could whenever she had to walk past a group of them. They were not being mean to her – in fact, they did not speak to her at all. But she was well aware of the fact that they were watching her, viewing her as some kind of curiosity that the Emperor had taken under his wing for entertainment.

The Emperor was the one she got to see very rarely. Sometimes she would catch a glimpse of him when he came to see Izayoi, but most of the time the lives of men and women were separated. Not even the Empress got to see him that often, as Izayoi had explained to her a while ago. He was a very busy man, and yet, he tried to find some time for the ones he cared about. He was the complete opposite of his son. Her husband.

Since their brief meeting in the garden she had not spoken to him again. Only one time she had run into him during one of her strolls through the castle, and he had acknowledged her presence with a small nod before turning back to his conversation partner. In many ways she was glad that he ignored her most of the time. The truth was that he scared her. And it was not just him. She was also afraid of his principal wife, the beautiful demoness named Kagura. The Crown Princess was just as mysterious as her husband, but unlike him, she seemed to have an active social life. According to Izayoi, she had nothing to fear from Kagura as the demoness was friends with both yōkai and humans, but Rin couldn’t help but being a little scared of her. Her red eyes seemed to pierce right into her soul each time she looked at her, and whenever Kagura spoke her voice sent shivers down Rin’s spine.

“It is not easy for her, you see,” Izayoi had said to Rin one evening after she had told her about her feelings. Speaking so many words at once was still exhausting for her. “Kagura is not a dog demon like the majority of yōkai here. And the fact that they have been married for such a long time now but haven’t had a child yet does not really help. But I’m sure that we only have to be patient, then she will be blessed with lots of little ones!” At that, she had touched her own belly and smiled happily.

Although Rin was glad to see Izayoi so happy, she could not help but wonder what the future would hold for her. Would she forever live like this? Or would she have children, too, just like Izayoi? At the moment, she doubted it. She was no fool, she knew how children were made, and currently it did not seem as if her husband was interested in her in such a way.

For now, she had to be content with what she had. She had freedom, and that was more than she had ever dared to hope for.

It was during one of her many strolls when she found a spot in the palace that intrigued her like nothing else.

Hidden away in the corner of the main shiro, between large trees and bushes, was a gate that Rin had never seen before. It looked incredibly heavy, but upon her touch it opened easily. To her surprise, there were no guards, no courtiers beyond these gates. There was only a long hallway, leading to a set of doors. Rin glanced over her shoulder. No one was watching her. It surely was not forbidden to enter these halls, she thought, otherwise she would have been stopped already by someone.

And so, she set foot into the hidden hallway and approached the doors. Slowly she pushed them open, entering the room they belonged to. The moment she realised where she had ended up, her breath hitched in her throat due to sheer surprise and awe.

It was a library.

A room full of large shelves that were filled with countless books and scrolls. There were hundreds of them, no, thousands even, all of them carefully arranged in a certain order. Before Rin knew what she was doing she had entered the library and approached the first shelf, her small hands carefully touching the books and scrolls. She had often heard about such places. Places of learning and wisdom, a world that had been entirely forbidden for her when she had been a slave. Her masters had owned books, but she had never been allowed to even touch them to get the dust of them. Here, dusting was not even necessary. It was all spotlessly clean, and probably in regular use.

She could not help herself. She had to get a closer look.

Rin took one of the books closest to her and pulled it from the shelf, studying its title. It was written in hiragana, much to her surprise, and rather easy to read. She opened it and began to read, realising it was a collection of poetry. It was the language of the court, the way lovers spoke to each other at night, and probably the most scandalous piece of writing she could have found on this particular shelf. Nonetheless, she got lost between the pages within seconds.

Going to the library quickly became her favourite thing to do. Especially at night when she could not sleep. During the day, she was usually with Izayoi and her son, learning from her what it took to be a wife. She was immensely grateful for these lessons, and she worked hard to achieve what seemed to come so easily to Izayoi. With the help of a teacher she learnt to play easy songs on the koto and the erhu; instruments she would not even have dared to touch in her previous life. It was a fun activity, and she spent many hours practising, hoping that perhaps her new skills would make her seem at least a little bit more interesting in the eyes of the man that continued to ignore her. But at night, she would go to the library. She would sit on the cushions for hours with a candle in her hand, reading book after book, gaining knowledge about almost every field that there was. She was so lost between the pages that she always forgot everything around herself.

She did not even realise that, during a particularly beautiful night, she was not alone anymore.

“You can read, then?”

Rin dropped the book she had been reading at the sudden sound of his voice and instinctively threw herself to the Emperor’s feet. Tōga, however, only chuckled.

“There is no need to be so formal, Lady Rin,” he said calmly and reached out to pick up the book. “Forgive my rude question. I was merely surprised that you seem to be able to read, despite your unusual upbringing.”

An unusual upbringing it was indeed, Rin thought as she slowly raised her head, only to see Tōga’s hand in front of her, offering her his help. Hesitantly she took it and rose again, blushing all over for behaving completely wrong once more.

But the Emperor did not seem to mind. “I see that you have found my favourite place,” he said and let go of her hand again. “This library is my sanctuary. My great-grandfather founded it and books and writings have been collected for it ever since. A library is never finished, you see.” He looked down at the book she had been reading in and chuckled. “High poetry,” he said. “I have always found these particular poems rather tedious. A little bit too much, you see? I don’t even want to imagine what Lady Izayoi would say if I compared her to the blossom of the apple tree for hours and hours without end.”

He put the book back into the shelf and clasped his hands on his back, studying Rin thoroughly. Izayoi had told him that the girl had settled in but desperately needed an occupation. His stubborn son had not deemed it important yet to take care of his young wife. A few children to look after would do her good, Tōga thought. He truly could not understand why his son would not be happy with a girl like her. Rin was pretty and kind, the dream of many men, actually.

“I assume you could not sleep either,” Tōga said eventually and sighed. “This is where I come whenever I cannot find rest. I went to see Lady Izayoi earlier but with the child and everything she was very exhausted and did not want to… talk.” He cleared his throat and scratched his head. “So, you have been reading poetry?”

Rin nodded shyly, clasping her hands nervously. Was it inappropriate for a woman of her standing to read such writings?

“There is better poetry than this,” Tōga said. “Come, I will show you where to find it.”

He gave her a warm smile and stepped back, holding out his hand to lead the way. Rin hesitated at first, but then she followed him through the library. It was even bigger than she had always thought, with lots of big and small shelves hidden in various corners, but the Emperor seemed to find his way blindly. Eventually they came to stand in front of a surprisingly small shelf that only contained a few books and a handful of scrolls, as well as some loose notes.

“This,” Tōga said and patted the book on top, “is a collection of the finest poetry you can find. Some of it has been written by my late grandfather and his favourite concubine. It is definitely worth reading. You must tell me what you think once you have read them all.”

Rin blinked at him in surprise, realising that he not only wanted her to read, but that he wanted her to come back to read the rest of it as well. Tōga smirked.

“Come here as often as you like,” he said.

Rin lowered her head and murmured a small thank you. For more she was still too shy in his presence, but he did not seem to mind. Instead, Tōga reached out and gently grasped her chin, lifting her head so that he could look her in the eye.

She was truly a beauty – not as perfect as his beloved Izayoi, but still a breathtaking beauty. The way she averted her gaze each time a man spoke to her was enchanting, and Tōga could not help but imagine what was hidden under these many layers of clothing.

Oh, his son was truly a moron for not realising what a jewel he had received.

“Nonetheless you should return to your chambers now,” he said. “And only come here during the day. You can never know who else wanders through these halls.”

Rin nodded lightly and Tōga let go of her chin, placing the first book in her hands. “I will take you back to your room.”

They did not speak again on the way back to the women’s shiro, but Rin was grateful for his presence. He never pressured her into speaking, just like Izayoi. He was incredibly patient, and treated her with respect. Unfortunately, her husband was nothing like his father.

Tōga turned to her once more as they arrived at the women’s shiro.

“I know that my son has not paid much attention to you yet,” he said. “But I ask you not to blame yourself. He… is a difficult man, I have to admit that. But he will never treat you badly. That is my promise.”

Rin nodded softly. “Thank you,” she whispered.

Tōga smiled. “You have a lovely voice, Lady Rin,” he said and inclined his head to her, staying where he was until Rin had disappeared into the shiro and closed the doors.

Only then, he began to walk away, humming a soft tune to himself.


	7. Nothing but Pretence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to a new update! There will be smut, there will be bad jokes, there will be a very annoyed Sesshomaru and a very pissed Kagura. What more could one possibly want? ;-)

The weeks passed and summer became autumn.

For the Crown Prince, however, it was not a time of idleness. He meditated and practised every single day, regardless of the weather. If anything, the cold would harden his body and spirit, and he would only come closer to his goal of achieving his father’s strength. One day, he would take the throne, and for that day he had to be ready. Although this day lay far away in the future.

“You need to move faster,” Sesshōmaru said to Kenshin as they walked in circles, never taking their eyes off each other. “Being slow will be your death.”

“Only if my opponent focuses on it,” Kenshin smirked. “But a good warrior must focus on everything and-“ He tripped and fell like a tree, landing in front of Sesshōmaru on the ground, coughing out dirt and dust.

The daiyōkai huffed. “Don’t try to lecture me, you fool,” he said and put his sword back into its sheathe. “You have always been clumsy.”

“But I’m clever,” Kenshin smirked, sitting up and wiping the dirt from his clothes. “That’s why your father promoted me.” He looked over his shoulder at the women that sat on the patio and watched them from behind their fans, grinning at them. “I’m not clumsy in bed, ladies!” He called, and the women squealed in excitement, fanning themselves excitedly and throwing passionate glances at him.

Sesshōmaru rolled his eyes and walked away to the other side of the courtyard where a maid served them water and sake. Sesshōmaru reached for the water whilst Kenshin reached immediately for the sake, as usual, taking several sips at once.

“Ah, that’s a good one,” he sighed, glancing at the ladies on the other side of the patio. “Hey, Sesshōmaru. Did you see the one on the left? Guess what. I had her in all the ways you could possibly imagine. And oh boy, let me tell you, I still carry the marks of her nails on my back, proudly!”

“Do you have no other things in mind than seducing women?” Sesshōmaru asked in annoyance.

“Why should I?” Kenshin asked in return and refilled his cup. “Women are lovely! I mean, just look at them! Their curves, the softness of their breasts and the way they moan when you just hit the right spot, and when they wrap their legs around you to-“

“Oh, for goodness’ sake, Kenshin, spare me of the details,” Sesshōmaru huffed and took a sip from the water, leaning against the pillar. It did not surprise him, though. Kenshin had always been that way. The day he had become a man he had been obsessed with the fairer sex and very little had changed since then. Nonetheless, Kenshin was still not married. It was not that there were no women interested in him. In fact, many women would have happily married Kenshin on the spot. But Kenshin found it hard to choose one. In Sesshōmaru’s eyes, he was merely picky.

“What? You know how it works. You’ve done it too,” Kenshin grinned. “Or what’s it like with Kagura?”

“What do you think it is like?” Sesshōmaru asked and raised an eyebrow. “We mate.”

“Yeah, but there’s so much more to it than just the technical part!” Kenshin said emphatically. “I mean, have you ever done it with her in the middle of a forest? Or in an onsen? Have you ever had her scratch your back bloody with her claws out of sheer ecstasy?”

“You, my friend, are sick,” Sesshōmaru huffed and shook his head. “Get a wife.”

Kenshin sighed and sat down on the steps. “Ah, I wish there was a woman around that I could marry. But none of them is the right one. None of them is the one I desire to be with.”

“That’s a mistress you are talking about, not a wife,” Sesshōmaru said. “A wife should come from a good family and be able to bear heirs.”

“In your view, perhaps,” Kenshin said. “But I want a woman that’s nice and lovely and pretty and sweet and great to talk to…”

Sesshōmaru rolled his eyes. The old romantic. “I’d give you my second one if I didn’t have to keep her,” he said. “I guess she is all of those things. Well, except for the last part. She does not speak.”

“At least not to you,” Kenshin reminded him. “Come on, don’t speak so lowly about her. She is a lovely girl! Any other man would be happy to have a wife like her. I’m sure she’s great company. Just think of it, sitting next to her in the garden under the cherry tree, she serves you tea and when you thank her she blushes and whispers a small thank you and all she hopes for is a little kiss, a wish you grant her willingly…” He sighed, resting his chin on his palm.

Sesshōmaru sighed, shaking his head. Anyone else would have thought Kenshin to be an absolute madman, but Sesshōmaru knew that the man was just an absolute hopeless romantic. And an idiot, too. Nonetheless, he was a strong and fierce warrior that deserved the position of a general of his majesty. Only a fool would dare to underestimate him.

“I mean it, Sesshōmaru,” Kenshin said, crossing his arms and looking up at his friend. “You have not only one, but two wives. That is what many men only dream about at night.”

“That is hardly my fault,” Sesshōmaru huffed, shaking his head. “I married Kagura because my parents arranged this match for me, and it is for the benefit of the West. And Lady Rin is my wife because my father pitied her and I cannot defy my sire’s command.”

Kenshin shook his head in both frustration and disbelief. He had known Sesshōmaru for a very long time now, and he knew when he was being honest and when he was trying to make it seem as if things did not bother him. Sesshōmaru always pretended that nothing ever annoyed him, that it was all due to his loyalty to his father, and that he would never defy his orders. But the Sesshōmaru that Kenshin knew was anything but cold and reserved. He knew how passionate and lively he could be – the way he had been as a child. But somewhere on the way he had lost his carefreeness and had become the cold and apparently indifferent prince that everyone knew.

Kenshin often wondered why.

“If I were you I’d give Lady Rin a chance,” Kenshin said and took a final sip from the sake before he reached for his sword again. “Because I am going to give one of the ladies over there a chance now…” He threw a knowing look over his shoulder at the women, who squealed in delight and fanned themselves excitedly, chatting about which one of them the dashing general would invite.

Sesshōmaru huffed. “I don’t care what you do in your spare time,” he said. “Remember that there will be a feast tonight and you are expected to be there.”

“Oh, I will be there, don’t you worry,” Kenshin said and stretched his muscles pretentiously as he made his way across the courtyard, humming a soft tune to himself as he approached the women and greeted them with the kindest of smiles and most passionate of looks.

Sesshōmaru drank the rest of the water and made his way back inside, his hand resting on the hilt of his sword. Bakusaiga was a fine sword and incredibly mighty, given to him on the peak of his power by his father. That day, his father had publicly acknowledged him as his heir. That day, any doubt that another would inherit the throne had been erased. He was the heir to the throne, and no one would ever dare to question it.

There was no way that his hanyō brother Inuyasha would inherit the throne of the West.

He let go of Bakusaiga and entered his chambers, taking off his armour and tossing it into the arms of a waiting servant, dismissing another that offered him some water with a wave of his hand.

“Run me a bath,” he said to him, tugging on the hem of his haori, only then realising how much he had been sweating during his training.

“Yes, Mylord,” the servant murmured and stepped back, taking the haori with him as the other servants went to prepare the bath next door. The rooms were exquisite and made for royalty, with a marble tub embedded in the mahogany floor and doors that opened up to a small garden which Sesshōmaru only ever visited at night to enjoy the silence and the moonlight. He often spent an entire afternoon in the bath, enjoying the solitude it gave him in order to think. He was rarely disturbed by anyone there, which made the bath one of his favourite places in the palace.

The bath, and the library of his father.

“Sesshōmaru-sama! Sesshōmaru-sama!” The annoying voice of his personal secretary came through the door, and a moment later, Jaken came in, bowing lowly to him. “Sesshōmaru-sama, forgive me for disturbing you in these rooms at this time of the day, I know how much you hate being disturbed in your private chambers-“

“Jaken,” Sesshōmaru said sharply, turning his head towards him. “What is it.”

The kappa gasped and bowed to him once more. “Your most honourable father sends me. His majesty asks me to tell you that the leader of the wolf tribe, Kouga, will be present at tonight’s feast and he asks you to remember to beha-ARGH!”

Sesshōmaru had kicked him through the paper doors with his boot and made his way through the room to the bath.

“I do not need a reminder that I need to _behave_ ,” Sesshōmaru said and took off his hakama. “Now leave or I might forget myself.”

Jaken mumbled a faint apology and crawled down the hall to the exit, muttering to himself under his breath. It was a great honour to work for the great Prince Sesshōmaru, he reminded himself over and over again. It was the greatest honour indeed.

Sesshōmaru submerged into the water and rested his arms on the edges of the tub, letting out a deep sigh of relief. The servants poured more hot water into the tub and added a few oils to enchant his senses before they bowed to him once more and left the room for good. For the next couple of hours none of them would dare to disturb him, unless he called for them.

But for now, he was entirely content with the solitude of his chambers.

His father had invited Kouga, the leader of the local wolf tribe, in order to strengthen the bonds between both kinds of yōkai. Wolves and dog demons had been enemies for a very long time, and only recently, his father had managed to negotiate a contract of peace between the throne and the leader of the wolves. And said leader named Kouga was one of the most arrogant beings that Sesshōmaru had ever encountered. In fact, he despised the poor excuse of a canine, and his father knew that very well. Nonetheless, it was not necessary that his father sent Jaken to him to remind him to behave. He knew where his place was, and he would not start a fight with Kouga on such an important evening.

Even if his fingers itched.

Sesshōmaru had almost drifted off to sleep as he heard the door behind him being opened and the gentle steps of a woman on the floor, approaching him gingerly. She carried a scent he would recognise everywhere.

“What is it?” He murmured, keeping his eyes closed.

“Would you mind if I joined you?”

Sesshōmaru sighed and shifted a little in the water. “If you wish.”

The water moved and overflowed the edges of the tub as she joined him in the hot water, and a moment later he felt the hand of a woman touching his, and a small foot caressing his thigh. As always, she would never give up on trying to seduce him. But he had to admit that this time, her advances were not necessarily unwelcome. Perhaps it was the right moment to seek for relaxation and pleasure, a good way to unwind from the exertion of his training with Kenshin.

Perhaps he should give it a try and follow the example of his friend.

Kagura let out a surprised squeak as her husband suddenly pulled her onto his lap and against his chest. She had not thought he would react to her advances that instantly, but she could not deny that she was pleasantly surprised. Kagura smiled and wrapped an arm around his neck, gently rubbing his chest with her free hand. He truly was a fine specimen of a yōkai. Strong and powerful, with the ancient blood of his ancestors running through his veins. Everything about him declared royalty. The dream of all women.

And he was hers.

“It is nice to see you in such a… good mood,” Kagura hummed and played with his hair. “I assume that your training session with Kenshin-sama was successful?”

“Hm, it was,” Sesshōmaru murmured, running his hands over her thighs and up her sides to her breasts. She was a beautiful woman, with the likeness of a goddess, and her slim, strong body felt like silk under his fingertips. In many ways, her appearance seemed too perfect. But then again, it was the fate of all demonesses to possess breathtaking beauty.

It truly was no wonder why so many human men fell for them.

Kagura hummed in delight under his touch and she reached for the clip that kept her hair together, removing it carefully to let her hair fall down her back freely. She knew how much her husband liked that. “I wish I had been there to watch,” she said, leaning forward, pressing her breasts against his chest as she whispered into his ear. “It surely was a mesmerising sight.”

Sesshōmaru was a yōkai, but he was also a man, and he was not immune to the charms of a beautiful woman. He felt his manhood twitch the moment she pressed herself against him to whisper into his ear, and his grip on her waist tightened a little more as he made her straddle his lap.

Kagura smirked. He might have been the Crown Prince, but he was also just a man and oh, men were so very predictable.

“May I?” She whispered into his ear, reaching down between their bodies.

Sesshōmaru growled into her ear. “You may.”

Kagura smiled and teased him a little before she eventually lowered herself onto him with a delightful sigh and buried her face in his shoulder as she rolled her hips in a slow but steady rhythm. It did not happen very often that they mated during the day, and she was wise enough to savour every single moment she got to spend with him in a tight embrace, giving in to their yōkai nature and the desires that came with it. And one of these desires was to mate and procreate. His hands had grabbed her waist tightly, pressing her down against him as he began to thrust up into her, his hips snapping into hers. Kagura gasped, burying her hands in his hair, her nails digging into his shoulders as he moved inside her. Oh, how she always longed for these moments when he only belonged to her, when she was in the centre of his attention.

“Oh, Sesshōmaru…” Kagura breathed and arched her back as the blissful warmth of arousal spread through her lower body. “Oh, yes… yes, that’s it…”

Sesshōmaru growled into her neck as he increased the pace of his thrusts, the arousal finally taking control over him as the heat spread through his body. It was the blood of his ancestors in his veins that ruled him in these moments, that and the urge to mate and procreate, and he felt his jaw lengthen a bit and his eyes glow red in passion.

“Oh, kami!” Kagura cried out and threw her head back as his claws grazed across her skin, leaving the slightest of marks. They would heal soon, but for now, they only added to the sheer excitement of their mating and oh, she could not get enough of it. “Yes, Sesshōmaru, please!”

She rolled her hips faster to meet his thrusts, her breath becoming more and more erratic until she suddenly cried out in pleasure, clenching hard around him and pushing him over the edge as well. “Oh Shujin!” She cried, grabbing the edges of the tub for support as Sesshōmaru suddenly buried his fangs in her throat as a mating gesture the moment he spent himself inside her.

Kagura was still panting by the time he had withdrawn his fangs from her flesh, and she pressed her lips against him in a tender yet passionate kiss.

“Thank you,” she breathed, caressing his cheek. “We should do this more often, don’t you think?”

Sesshōmaru returned the kiss only briefly. The moment he had climaxed he had regained control over his senses, and with it, his cold attitude had returned as well.

“This Sesshōmaru has little time for idleness,” he said and took one of the towels the servants had left within reach.

Kagura sighed and sat back, moving away from him. “You did not enjoy this at all?” She asked in frustration, crossing her arms. “You can’t be serious.”

Sesshōmaru had emerged from the water and wrapped the towel around his waist. “Of course I enjoyed our mating, Kagura,” he said and held his hand out for her.

Kagura frowned and looked at his hand for a long moment before she took it and rose as well, the water dripping from her body as she stepped out of the bathtub and came to stand in front of her husband.

Sesshōmaru took another towel and put it around her shoulders, suddenly pulling her closer until their faces almost touched. “But there are more things that require my attention than just that,” he said and let go of her again.

Kagura huffed and sat down on a cushion in the corner, watching him getting dressed. “Well, your other wife certainly is not one of them.”

Sesshōmaru turned around to her. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“It means that people talk,” Kagura said and reached for a comb to tame her hair. “You have two wives, and neither Rin nor I show any signs of a pregnancy. Which is hardly my fault, regarding the very few times you choose to mate with me.” She rose and went to the door. “And you know what they say, Sesshōmaru. A man that cannot impregnate neither of his multiple wives must have a problem with his… virility.”

Sesshōmaru scowled at her. “We will have an heir,” he growled.

Kagura raised an eyebrow and picked up her clothes. “I’m just saying that people will talk,” she said. “And with two wives not being pregnant the women are not the ones they will be speaking about.”

She walked out of the room and shut the door behind herself, leaving her husband behind with an expression as if he had just bitten into a very sour lemon.


	8. Those Who Fear

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I frickin' love Touga so, so much. And Izayoi. God.

The great hall was as crowded as it had been the night of Rin’s arrival – every courtier, every noble man or woman had gathered in these halls that night in order to witness a very unique spectacle. It had been centuries since the last time a leader of a wolf tribe had come to the palace with peaceful intentions, and everyone was curious to see how things would work out – or if the evening would end in a blood bath.

Kōga, the leader of the Western wolf tribe, was a charming young man. That much everyone had to admit. It did not take long until the first young ladies started throwing passionate glances at him from behind their fans, but Kōga did not seem to react to them. Instead, he focused on his conversation with the Emperor, who seemed surprisingly relaxed that night.

The Empress knew why. And she knew that she had to thank the many talents of the Lady Izayoi for that.

Said lady was sitting to Yonoko’s left, enjoying the food and drinks whilst entertaining Kōga’s wife, Ayame. Yonoko could not have been more grateful for Izayoi than she was in this very moment. She hated having to entertain the wives of their guests, but Izayoi always did so willingly, and it seemed that Ayame was enjoying the company of Tōga’s human wife very much. They were chatting excitedly about their children, comparing the progress they were making based on their age. Recently, Inuyasha had learnt to walk short distances on his own, and the day he had called his father ‘Papa’ in front of a bunch of servants had ended for the entire court with a magnificent feast.

Yonoko could only smile at her husband’s antics. He had always been fond of his children, regardless of their age.

Her eyes wandered to her own son, who sat to Kōga’s left with his wives, not paying attention to either of them. Kagura was impeccably dressed in a festive red kimono that matched her eyes, taking small sips of sake every now and then while speaking to her personal maid. Rin looked just as lovely as her, but she kept her eyes fixed on her lap, almost seeming like a statue.

“What a magnificent feast, Tōga-sama,” Kōga said after a while with a deep sigh as he let his eyes wander. “I’m glad that we were able to settle this argument for once and for all. This country needs peace.”

“I agree,” Tōga said, refilling his guest’s cup. “Too many lives have been risked, or been lost. The human population can finally live without fear again.”

Kōga agreed with a hum. “Your fondness for humans is well-known,” he said, glancing at Izayoi. “And allow me to say that you have an excellent taste. Lady Izayoi is a jewel. I heard that she birthed you a son?”

“Yes, indeed,” Tōga said proudly and began to smile. “Prince Inuyasha is becoming stronger with every day, and one day he will be a fearless warrior.”

“If my eyes do not betray me then it seems that the Lady Izayoi is with child again?” Kōga asked, taking a closer look at the woman that was entertaining his wife. “You are a lucky man, Tōga-sama.”

Tōga smirked. “I am. Lady Izayoi has given me more than I could have possibly asked for. But what about you? I heard that your daughter is doing well?”

“She is, yes,” Kōga said, glancing at Ayame. “But we hope for a son, you see. For the balance.”

“I know what you mean,” Tōga said. “I hope that this one will be a girl. After two sons it is time for some tenderness in the family.”

Kōga chuckled. “Speaking of sons,” he said, turning his head towards Sesshōmaru, who was watching the crowd like a hawk. “I heard that you got yourself another wife, too.” He leant forward to look at Rin, greeting her with a smile and a wave of his hand. “A human one, even.”

Sesshōmaru reached for his sake. “A most generous gift of my most honourable father,” he commented, taking a sip.

“A generous gift indeed, what a beauty she is!” Kōga said. “I met a human girl once – kami, she was beautiful. But she did not want to marry me, despite my efforts to impress her. What a pity…” He sighed.

Sesshōmaru sighed inwardly. The wolf reminded him of Kenshin, who could have easily spoken these exact words. It seemed as if every man he knew was obsessed with human women – an obsession he truly could not understand.

“Beauty is one thing, Kōga-sama,” Sesshōmaru said. “Intelligence is another. A trait that most human women lack, I have found.”

“Sesshōmaru,” Tōga said calmly, looking at his son. “You think too little of women.”

“Forgive me, Chichiue,” Sesshōmaru said, inclining his head to him. “But I do not think little of women. I regard them as equals. Only a fool would dare to underestimate my most honourable mother, or my most honourable wife, Princess Kagura. I have had the pleasure to become the victim of her wrath once, and I shall never cross her in such a way again.”

He put his cup down before he continued. “But I must say that I have yet to find the same qualities in human women, Kōga-sama. They may be beautiful, but they often lack the intelligence and wit that female yōkai naturally possess. Therefore, I doubt that they make good mates to our kind. But that is just my opinion, of course.”

“Eh, my good friend,” Kōga said with a small smile and cleared his throat. “Surely you cannot say that about every human woman. I mean, you have a human wife! I’m sure she is absolutely lovely, and great company, too.”

“I’m afraid that I must disappoint you,” Sesshōmaru replied coldly. “I have yet to find any desirable trait of her personality, for beauty does not matter to me. But I cannot tell if she would manage to entertain me as she has chosen to remain a mute.” He threw his hair over his shoulder. “A clear indicator for a lack of intelligence,” he added, so quiet that it was impossible for Rin or any other human in the room to hear. But that was not necessary. Rin was smart enough to know that he thought very little of her, merely because of the fact she was human, and not a yōkai, like Kagura or the empress.

“Perhaps it is for the best,” he said loudly, reaching for his sake once more. “Human women should stay mute, for there is little they might have to say.”

“It seems that you are afraid, Mylord.”

A voice, so far unheard by almost everyone at court, was enough to make the room fall silent, and suddenly, every pair of eyes was directed at the young woman to Kagura’s left. She had raised her head; her beautiful face becoming truly visible to the court for the first time in months. And she had spoken.

Even Sesshōmaru seemed taken aback at the sound of her voice. But if he was surprised, then he did not show it. He turned his head towards her, an arrogant expression on his godlike face.

“Those who fear the words of women fear to find themselves inferior based on what she has to say,” Rin said quietly, her voice barely audible for the humans in the room, but the yōkai understood every single word. “A true man does not fear the challenge. A true man argues with a woman on an equal basis in case of disagreement, and admits when he is defeated. But to fear the words of a woman solely based on her sex shows of great insecurity of the man in question.”

She lifted her gaze and for the first time, she was looking him directly in the eye. Brown eyes met golden ones, but for a second only, as she then averted her gaze again, following the courtly protocol.

For a moment, it was deathly quiet in the hall.

And then, after what seemed like an eternity, Sesshōmaru let out a small, derogatory laugh.

“SESSHOMARU!”

Tōga had slammed his fist on the table, and he rose from his cushion, towering over his son in an almost threatening way. Izayoi had almost jumped on the spot, and even Yonoko seemed genuinely surprised at her husband’s sudden outburst, but she did not interfere. She knew her place.

“How DARE you to insult your wife like that!” Tōga barked. “And not only do you insult her, but also Lady Izayoi! You will apologise this instant and ask them for forgiveness!”

Sesshōmaru rose as well, looking his father in the eye. He was not a fool. He would not challenge him or fight him for something as minor as that.

“I am sorry, Chichiue,” he said calmly. “But I have my opinion.”

“OUT!” Tōga shouted, grabbing Sesshōmaru by the collar and pushing him towards the exit. “And don’t you dare to return until you have apologised!”

Sesshōmaru stopped himself from falling by reaching for the pillar, readjusting his clothing as he turned around to his father and their guests, who were watching in horror.

“Very well, Chichiue,” he huffed, bowing lowly to him. “I had no intention of staying for much longer anyway.”

And with that he turned around and walked out of the room, skipping the few steps down to the courtyard as he transformed into his true shape and took to the skies, flying away.

Tōga was still boiling with rage as he turned around to his guests once more and flopped down onto his cushion, grabbing the bottle of sake.

The musicians quickly began to play again and the people resumed their conversations and dances, as if nothing had happened at all. It was considered bon ton to simply pretend that nothing had happened at all in such a moment. But they could not stop themselves from glancing at the Lady Rin every now and then, who had returned to her previous state of perfect stillness.

“I must apologise for my son, Kōga-sama,” Yonoko said calmly as she fanned herself. “For you see, he is still a very young man only, and they often find themselves unable to control their emotions.”

But Kōga just shook his head. “I do not blame you, your majesties,” he assured both Yonoko and Tōga. “I am of the same age, and I must admit that this sort of outburst is not solely exclusive to inu yōkai.”

Tōga huffed, reaching for another bottle of sake. “My son is an insolent child,” he muttered, and was about to refill his cup as Izayoi appeared at his side, taking the bottle out of his hand.

“My beloved, let me help you,” she said, her voice calm and soothing as she spoke, and to Kōga’s surprise, he let her. Izayoi filled the cup, but only to a half, and then she hid the bottle behind Yonoko’s back. Kōga watched in amazement, realising that the secondary wife of the emperor held more power over him that one would expect at first. “Please, do not be angry with Sesshōmaru,” Izayoi said, gently touching his arm. “Anger is not a solution.”

Tōga huffed, placing his hand on top of hers. “Did you not hear what he said, my darling?” He asked. “He insulted you, too.”

“I am sure that he did not mean it,” Izayoi said calmly. “He is still so very young, and going through a difficult phase in his life. Please be lenient with him, Mylord.”

She lowered her head submissively, and Kōga could barely believe what he saw. This woman, this weak human woman, was able to control the Emperor of the West by gestures only. If she had not been the secondary wife of Tōga, he would have thought her to be a witch. But there was nothing supernatural about the Lady Izayoi. She was just a human, and the woman that the Emperor of the West had happened to fall in love with.

Tōga looked down at Izayoi, sighing deeply. “Yes. Of course.” He kissed her hair gently. “But I hope that this has not upset you too much,” he said, gently placing his large hand on her belly. “Think of the child you are carrying. Perhaps it is time that you return to your chambers and rest.”

Izayoi smiled and nodded softly. “Yes, Mylord, I think you are right. May I take the Lady Rin with me?”

Tōga nodded, glancing at the young woman next to Kagura. “Of course. But first I would like to speak to her.”

Kagura raised an eyebrow, but she obeyed nonetheless, touching Rin’s arm gently and gesturing at Tōga. Rin rose from her cushion and walked around the table to kneel before the emperor. Immediately, all eyes in the room were fixed on her, but the people pretended not to pay attention nonetheless.

“Lady Rin, I ask you not to be offended by my son’s words,” Tōga said, still holding Izayoi’s hand. “He is young, and he is stupid at times. I hope you can forgive him.”

Rin nodded lightly, keeping her eyes fixed on the ground as she had been told. Thanks to Izayoi, she now knew the difference between public and private behaviour, and this was a situation where Tōga was not a member of her new family, but her sovereign.

“Nonetheless, I am glad that you have found your voice,” Tōga added. “And I am sure we would all like to hear more of it in the future. You may go.”

Kōga watched in complete silence as the young human rose gracefully and joined the Lady Izayoi, both making their way out of the hall with the grace of a goddess. What a strange, yet remarkable place the Western palace was. A place where humans and yōkai coexisted peacefully most of the time, and where a family, a pack, tried to make the best of it.

In many ways, the wolves and the dogs were much alike, he thought.

“Your husband is staring, Ayame-sama,” Yonoko remarked.

Ayame shrugged, glancing at Kōga for a moment. “What can I say,” she said. “He likes a beautiful face.”

*******

The two women had retreated to Izayoi’s chambers, where it was far more peaceful and quieter than in the great hall. They could still hear the laughter and the music that the wind carried to them, but here, in the women’s shiro, there was no protocol to follow, no ceremony to obey to. They could be themselves.

Rin sat behind Izayoi and combed her hair carefully, a task that Izayoi could not perform sufficiently on her own anymore as her belly had increased in size. It would not be long now until she gave birth to her second child, and the entire court knew how excited the emperor already was.

Izayoi winced a little, causing Rin to pause.

“I’m fine,” Izayoi assured her quickly. “The child just kicked me. It likes to do that in the evenings.” She sighed softly, gently rubbing her belly to soothe the baby. “Mama is here…”

Rin continued with her task, combing strand after strand of Izayoi’s beautiful, long hair that reminded her of a silken curtain. Izayoi truly was a princess, inside and out, and she understood well why Tōga had fallen in love with her. Izayoi was gentle, kind, and affectionate, and she had a big heart.

“I’m glad that you stood up for yourself, Rin,” Izayoi said softly, looking at Rin’s face in the mirror. “It was high time that someone cut Sesshōmaru down to size. But please do not be angry with him. He has a difficult life, you see.”

Rin nodded softly. Although she had every right to be offended, she found that she was not. For some reason, she did not care about Sesshōmaru’s opinion, despite the fact he was her husband. But he had played such a little part in her new life so far that she could not help but regard him as not very important. It would have been different if Tōga had said such a thing about her. Yes, then she would have been sad.

But with Sesshōmaru, she did not see a reason to be disappointed. What else could she expect from him?

From a man that did not even treat Kagura with the attention and the respect that she deserved?

“Rin,” Izayoi said, turning around to her. “Are you happy here? Please tell me the truth.”

Rin frowned softly, but she did as she was told, and nodded.

“Can you tell me?” Izayoi asked. “Can you tell me with words that you are happy? Please, I need to know.”

Rin was confused, but she did not refuse Izayoi’s request. She was her friend, and she surely had her reasons.

“I am happy,” Rin said, her voice quiet and more like a whisper, but it was there. “I have a good life here.”

Izayoi smiled in relief. “I’m glad,” she said, taking Rin’s hands into hers. “I would hate to see you sad. We all love you, you know? The empress thinks that you are a lovely girl, and even Kagura told me that she regards you as a good choice!”

“But my husband hates me.”

“He does not hate you,” Izayoi replied. “Sesshōmaru is… very difficult. It is hard to explain why, and is too late to start speaking about it now.” She yawned softly and covered her mouth with her small hand. “Oh dear… I think it is high time that we go to sleep.”

Rin helped Izayoi to lie down, and as she returned to her own room after wishing her a good night, she found herself unable to find rest. She was not as tired as she had thought, and so, she took the lantern from the wall and made her way down the hallway to the library. After all, she had Tōga’s permission to go there whenever she wished.

Little did she know that a pair of golden eyes was watching her as she entered the hidden room. But the man they belonged to did not follow her.

He had merely wanted to see if she was fine.

And it seemed that the Lady Rin was made of sterner stuff than most women he had encountered so far.


	9. A Most Complicated Family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my lovely people! :) Welcome to a new chapter!

It was a few days after the feast when a handwritten note was delivered to Rin.

She had joined Izayoi in her rooms in the afternoon, keeping her company in the drawing room as it was too cold and too rainy for the women to sit in the garden. The emperor’s wife was not feeling to well, and so, she was grateful for Rin’s company, which distracted her from the rough kicks the baby was giving her these days. It was only a matter of a few days or weeks until she would get to hold her little boy or girl, and Izayoi was very excited.

Inuyasha was playing on the floor between Rin and his mother as the two women chatted with each other about this and that. Izayoi was glad that Rin had begun to speak more, and their rather one-sided conversations had become much more meaningful since then. Izayoi learnt more about Rin’s interests, realising that the girl was very talented when it came to music. She had a lovely singing voice, too, and Izayoi was sure that if Rin chose to recite poetry for an audience, everyone would listen.

“What does it feel like?” Rin asked Izayoi. “Having a baby.”

“You mean, carrying one?” Izayoi asked, touching her belly. “Oh, it is such a wonderful feeling, believe me. At first you feel nothing, but then it feels like having butterflies in your stomach. And then, after a few months, you feel it move for the first time, and as it grows, it becomes more active. Just like this one here.” She smiled and rubbed her belly. “Inuyasha was just as active. But I hope that this one is a girl. It would be so lovely to have both. But I’d be happy about another boy, too.”

“His majesty surely hopes for a boy, though,” Rin said, clasping her hands on her lap as she watched Inuyasha roll over the tatami mats in pure delight, hugging one of his stuffed animals. “I have realised that girls usually count very little in this world.”

Izayoi frowned softly. “Not here, Rin,” she said. “His majesty values women above everything. He would never be disappointed if one of his children was a girl.”

“Not his majesty, perhaps,” Rin replied. “But many others surely do not think that way.”

Izayoi tilted her pretty head to the side. “You mean Sesshōmaru,” she said eventually. “If I were you, I would not worry too much about him. Or about what he has said. He is a child still in many ways, you see.” She reached for the teapot on the table between them and carefully poured Rin a cup. “He may look like an adult, but compared to human years, he’s… I don’t know, perhaps twenty, I guess. And you know how men in their early twenties are. Usually like Kenshin-sama.”

“Who is Kenshin?” Rin asked.

“Oh, you don’t know?” Izayoi asked in surprise. “He is Sesshōmaru’s closest friend. The son of his wet nurse, you see. You saw him when you met Sesshōmaru for the first time.”

“The man standing on the patio?”

“Precisely. He is very popular at court, especially amongst the ladies.” Izayoi suddenly chuckled, blushing and touching her cheek. “Oh my, I remember when I joined the household of the Dowager Countess. Kenshin-sama tried to seduce me, but the Dowager Countess hit him with her shoes!” She laughed at the memory, shaking her head. “But he apologised to me, and from that moment on, he was nothing but a gentleman. You should speak to him if you get the chance. You might learn a thing or two from him about Sesshōmaru.”

Rin sighed, reaching for her tea and taking a small sip. “I’m not so sure if I even want that,” she said. “I mean, he does not care for me. So why should I care for him?”

“Because he is your husband, Rin.”

“And I am his wife. But he does not see that as a reason to treat me with respect and… and dignity,” Rin said with a deep frown. “I don’t see why I should try to make a man that does not want me to like me.”

Izayoi opened her mouth to reply as the door slid open and her maid Yona came in, kneeling by their side. “This letter arrived for the Lady Rin, Mylady,” she said, handing the letter to Izayoi. The young women exchanged surprised looks, but because of very different reasons. Rin had never received a letter before in her life – after all, she did not know anyone who would write to her for any reason. Izayoi, however, had immediately recognised the elegant handwriting on the parchment, and she wondered what the letter was about.

“It is from his majesty,” Izayoi said and gave the letter to Rin, who broke the seal carefully. “I wonder what he wants?”

Rin carefully opened the letter, her eyes wandering over the complicated letters.

_To the most honourable Lady Rin,_

_I would be delighted if you joined me for a cup of tea and a game of shōgi tonight._

_Please let me know if you will come as soon as possible._

_Tōga._

Rin read the letter a few times before she gave it to Izayoi, who had extended her hand for the letter already. Izayoi read the letter quickly, a small smile forming on her face.

“What does this mean?” Rin asked in confusion. “I don’t understand.”

Izayoi folded the letter again and turned to Yona, who was patiently waiting beside her. “Tell his majesty that Lady Rin is delighted to accept his invitation,” she said, and before Rin could protest, the maid had already risen and left the room through the open door.

“Izayoi, what does this mean?” Rin asked with a deep frown. “Why does he wish to see me and not you?”

Izayoi smiled knowingly. “My beloved has his reasons, believe me,” she said. “For now, he only wishes for your company. I’m sure that he hopes to make up for Sesshōmaru’s terribly rude behaviour. Speaking to him will help you, believe me.”

Rin said nothing to that, looking down at Inuyasha, who had begun to arrange his toys in an oddly shaped circle around him.

“What is shōgi?” She asked eventually.

Izayoi gasped. “Oh, you don’t know what shōgi is! It is a board game, and Tōga-sama likes it very much. Come, I’ll teach you how it works!”

And so, Rin spent the rest of the afternoon with Izayoi sitting in front of a shōgi board, trying to remember all the different tiles and their possible moves until the sun began to set, and dinner was served. Inuyasha sat on Rin’s lap, munching his little portion as he babbled away happily, much to his mother’s delight.

*******

The maid that had come to collect her took Rin down endless hallways, deep into a part of the palace that she had not entered before. It was the realm of the Emperor himself, the place where he lived and studied in private, away from the eyes of the court. It was where the Imperial Family usually gathered on special occasions, where heirs were born and memories were treasured. For Rin, these halls were usually forbidden. She was only the secondary wife of the Crown Prince, who lived in an entirely different part of the palace. Usually, only in his company she would be allowed to come here – or if the emperor called for her personally.

Izayoi had told her that Tōga surely had good reasons to call for her. Nonetheless, Rin was nervous. She had never been alone with a man like him before, and she knew that it was a great honour to be invited by the emperor himself. Her shōgi skills, however, were very poor, and she prayed that she would not make a fool of herself.

The maid suddenly stopped at a large door, kneeling down on the floor. “I bring you the most honourable Lady Rin, your majesty.”

The door slid open and Rin quickly lowered her head, bowing deeply to the man that stood before her – only to hear laughter coming from within.

“Really, what a perfect bow!” A male voice that did not belong to Tōga said. Rin quickly looked up, realising that it was not Tōga who had opened the door – but Kōga, the leader of the wolf tribe. He was grinning down at her, leaning against the doorframe.

“Do not tease her, Kōga-sama,” she heard Tōga say, his warm voice sending shivers down her spine.

“Alright, alright,” Kōga chuckled, stepping aside. “Forgive me, Lady Rin, I did not mean to be rude.” He turned around to Tōga again, folding his arms. “Well then, I shall return to my wife before that Kenshin flirts with her again.”

“If he does, smack the back of his head with a shoe,” Tōga recommended with a chuckle. “That is known to work wonders with him.”

Kōga laughed and turned around to Rin once more, who still stood frozen in the doorframe, unable to move. “Have a pleasant evening, Lady Rin,” he said, bowing his head politely to her as he walked out of the room and down the hallway to the gates.

Tōga rose from his seat and came to the door, holding out his hand for Rin. “Forgive me, I did not know how to throw him out without seeming impolite,” he said. “I’m glad that you came. Come in.”

Shyly, Rin placed her small hand in his large palm and followed him inside. The emperor’s rooms were – and there was truly no other word for it – magnificent. The finest tatami mats covered the dark wooden floor, whilst golden and silver ornaments adorned the walls and pillars. The door towards the garden was open, offering a stunning view of a large tree and a beautiful pond, surrounded by bushes and flowers.

“Please,” Tōga said, leading Rin to the table in the centre of the room where a steaming pot of tea and a set of cups were waiting for them, as well as a shōgi board. Rin sat down carefully, clasping her hands on her lap as she kept looking down at the table, avoiding to look him in the eye.

Tōga sat down as well, reaching for the teapot and pouring her a cup. “Please forget about the protocol, Lady Rin,” he said. “It makes things so much more difficult, don’t you think? And besides, there is no one else in here except the two of us. I like looking at people when I speak to them, you see.”

He pushed the cup towards her, and as Rin shyly lifted her gaze, she saw that he was smiling at her encouragingly.

He truly was an extraordinary man.

Carefully, she reached for the teapot to pour him a cup in return, just the way she had been taught by Izayoi. Tōga smiled, thanking her as he reached for the cup and took a small sip. Rin imitated his actions, not sure what else to do or say.

“I have been looking forward to this, you see,” Tōga said eventually. “I wanted to speak to you in private some time. Izayoi tells me a lot about you, of course, but I wanted to see for myself if you are doing well here. If you are feeling at home, you see.” He took another sip from the tea before he put the cup down on the table, crossing his arms over his chest. “But after my son’s terrible comment I realised that this could not wait any longer.”

Rin looked down at the steaming cup of tea in her hands. “His words are not yours, Mylord,” she said quietly. “I would be terribly sad if you felt responsible for them.”

Tōga sighed. “I feel responsible for my son, you see,” he said. “And for you. After all, it was my decision to give him to you as a husband. I have to admit that both of my wives have criticised me for it, and I assume that you can guess why. Sesshōmaru is anything but easy. Neither for me, nor for anyone else.”

“My most honourable husband is not you, Mylord,” Rin replied softly, finally meeting his gaze.

“I do not expect him to be like me,” Tōga said, reaching for a tile to make the first move on the shōgi board. “He is not even like his mother. But that is hardly surprising. She barely saw him when he was a child.”

Rin frowned a little, reaching out to make a move on the game board.

“All I expect of him is to be respectful towards those he is responsible for,” Tōga murmured. “And towards the ones he will be responsible for in the future, namely the people of this empire. How can I put my people into his hands if he cannot even treat his wives with the respect they deserve.” He sighed deeply, reaching for his tea once more. “But I hope that you will not allow my insolent son to darken your mood, Lady Rin. Believe me when I say that we are all very happy to have you with us. Especially Lady Izayoi. She regards you as a sister already.”

Rin blushed deeply, murmuring a small thank you.

“It is true,” Tōga said and began to smile again. “Every time I see her she won’t shut up about you. Sometimes I wonder if the gods sent you to this place just to keep her company. You make her very happy. She has many friends, you see, but she needed someone like you. Someone that she can trust completely.”

Rin lowered her gaze and bowed lightly. “I feel honoured that Lady Izayoi puts her trust in me,” she said softly. “I will not disappoint her.”

“I know you won’t,” Tōga said. “Now, shall we continue with our game?”

For the next two hours, Rin and Tōga played several rounds of shōgi. He was an excellent player, but he let Rin win a few times on purpose, pretending to be devastated at his failure. It was true – he was the born entertainer, and always genuine in his intentions. In his presence, Rin managed to relax, and she spoke more than she had ever spoken before. Tōga did not pressure her into telling him about her past – it all came out naturally. He was patient, listening carefully as she told him about the north, and about the life she had had before coming to the West.

“I am grateful for this new life,” she said eventually, her throat becoming sore from speaking so much. “And if there is… anything that I can do to return your kindness, then I will do so.”

They had drunk the last few sips of their tea, and it had become late. Most people had already gone to bed, and Rin was sure that Izayoi was already fast asleep in her chambers, dreaming of tomorrow. So she would tell her about her evening the following morning.

Tōga looked out of the open door at the moon that had risen above the castle in a perfect circle.

“Beautiful, is it not,” he said eventually. “The full moon gives us yōkai strength, did you know that? Especially those that bear the marking of the crescent on their skin. Like my wife, and my son.”

Tōga rose from his cushion and so did Rin, watching him as he went to the open door to look up at the sky. “He is probably out there, somewhere. Sulking. Cutting trees down in frustration.” He turned his head to look at Rin, his face suddenly adorned with a pitiful expression.

“You do not have to consider yourself subordinate to him, Rin,” he said quietly. “The fact that you are married to him does not have to stop you from seeking other pleasures.”

For a moment, Rin stared at him, not understanding what he was talking about. But then, suddenly, realisation hit her, and she quickly lowered her gaze in shame, clutching the fabric of her kimono.

It surely was a great crime to refuse the Emperor. Oh, how could she have been so stupid! An invitation to his chambers for a cup of tea and shōgi did not simply fall from the sky!

“But I take it that you wish to return to your chambers,” she heard Tōga say, and a moment later, she felt his hand on her chin, gently raising her head. “That is understandable. I hope that you do not think any less of me.”

Rin shook her head quickly.

Tōga let go of her again and led her to the door, where, much to her surprise, a maid was already kneeling and waiting for her.

“Again, I thank you for spending this evening with me,” Tōga said, his hand briefly touching Rin’s. “You are a valued member of this family. And I am glad that you are here.”

Rin bowed deeply to him and wished him a good night as the door was closed once more, leaving her alone in the darkness with the maid that would take her back to her rooms.

The moment she found herself back in her chambers, Rin let out a shaky breath, leaning against the wall as she tried to calm down. The emperor had made clear advances towards her, offering her to spend the night with him. And she had refused. And he had let her go.

“Oh kami,” she whispered, shaking her head. “What am I supposed to do now?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "BUT HE IS MARRIED AND HAS TWO WIVES AND RIN IS HIS SON'S WIFE!"
> 
> Yep! But back then, it was considered entirely normal for even married women to have lovers - as long as they always remembered to whom they belonged.


	10. Distracted Minds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there!  
> Last time there were lots of comments that certain things came unexpected etc., so I ask you to look at the tags once again, just to make sure that there won't be any more surprises.
> 
> This story is definitely not a prime example for monogamy or loyalty to a partner. Different times, different customs, and of course, different worlds - after all, this is a fantasy world, and that means that basically everything is possible. 
> 
> This time, Sesshomaru is seeking shelter with an old friend, and he might acquire a taste for a certain kind of woman.

High up in the north, a daiyōkai walked through the streets of Aomori.

It was not unusual for a yōkai of his sort to visit the northern lands, but usually, people like him came with a delegation.

This Sesshōmaru, however, preferred to travel on his own. Very rarely, he would take his personal secretary, Jaken, with him. Most of the time, he travelled alone. He could not stand the endless, mindless chatter of courtiers, nor the continuous advances of his principal wife, who would have surely come with him gladly.

The majority of people in Aomori were human, and yet, they recognised him. But they were polite enough to leave him alone, merely throwing curious glances at him as he walked past them. Inu yōkai were rare in the north, as it was the land of the Dragon clan. But his kind was welcome, nonetheless. His father had signed a peace treaty with the north a few centuries ago, and since then, the exchange of goods had blossomed between the realms. It was a peaceful time for the whole country, it seemed.

But Sesshōmaru knew that it was a lie.

Somewhere, things were changing continuously. And that did not necessarily mean something good.

After taking several turns, he eventually found himself standing in front of a large house. On the ground floor, it was home to a restaurant, but on the first and second floor, he would find shelter.

The woman sitting at the door looked up only briefly before she let him pass, taking a long drag from her pipe. Sesshōmaru walked up the narrow staircase to a wooden door that had been sealed with a sutra. He cut it in half with his claws, and the seal vanished immediately as he pushed the door open.

It was dark in the room due to the shutters that covered the windows, and not a single candle had been lit despite the fact a woman was resting on the futon in the corner, fanning her bare chest due to the unusually high temperatures.

“Only the most powerful ones break the seal,” she hummed and turned her head to look at the intruder. “If that isn’t his imperial highness.”

“Chieko.”

The woman sat up, her purple eyes glowing in the dark.

“Here again to sulk, Sesshōmaru-sama?” She asked. “Or did you come here for the one thing only?”

Sesshōmaru huffed and sank down on the other futon by the opposite wall. “I have never visited you because I required your services, Chieko-san,” he reminded her.

“Quite right,” Chieko said and stretched extensively, as if to give him a proper view of her bosom before she rose from her futon and walked towards him, the silver jewellery she wore around her waist jingling as she moved.

Of all yōkai that he knew, Chieko was the one that had always puzzled him the most. She was far too clever for her own good, and too pretty, too. And yet, she chose to live as a high-class prostitute for those that could afford her services. The seal on her door prevented those she deemed not worthy from entering, and those that got to enjoy a session with her would leave this house as changed men.

Sesshōmaru had met Chieko in the middle of a forest, where she had feasted on a bunch of kitsune. For some reason, they had had mutual respect for each other on the spot.

“Well then, Sesshōmaru-sama,” she hummed, coming closer with swaying hips as she reached for the pipe she had left on the table by the door. “What brings you to my little temple of lust?”

With a wave of her hand she created a small flame which she used to light the pipe before she brought it to her lips, taking a drag. “Did your father annoy you again?”

Sesshōmaru huffed. “Have you not heard the news yet?” He asked her. “That he gave me another wife?”

“Oh, yes, that,” Chieko hummed, leaning against the doorframe and readjusting her poor excuse of a skirt. It consisted of two long, narrow strips of purple silk, covering her barely and exposing her thighs completely. “Everyone knows about it. The slave that our prince sent you, right? You should feel honoured, Sesshōmaru-sama. Northern slaves are of a good quality.”

“I know exactly why he did that,” Sesshōmaru muttered. “This is meant as some kind of lesson. To teach me humility, I assume. Respect for humans.” He shook his head. “I do not care what my father does in his spare time, but why must he punish me with a human wife? Who is, by the way, one of the dumbest women I have ever seen. She does not even talk properly.”

Chieko sighed. Each time Sesshōmaru came to her, he came to complain. Usually, the reason for his complaints was something his father had done, and since he was not allowed to criticise his sire in any way in the West, he came to her.

“Just ignore her, then,” she said. “Spend time with your other wife. Kagura seems to be a lovely woman, and similar to you. According to what you have told me, of course.”

Sesshōmaru shook his head. “She is becoming a nuisance, too.”

“Still no heir in sight, then?”

“It is not my fault that she does not conceive.”

“But it is your fault to some degree if you do not do your marital duties, my friend.” Chieko took a long drag of the pipe, exhaling the smoke slowly, watching it rise towards the ceiling before she approached Sesshōmaru and straddled his lap, putting her arms around his neck. “I mean… everything is working well in that certain area, is it not?” She smirked and reached down between their bodies, touching the growing bulge in his white hakama.

“I must admit that I’m jealous,” she continued. “Your wives get to enjoy all of this all the time. That means, if you bed them both. I assume that you haven’t touched the new one?”

“Why should I?” Sesshōmaru replied quietly. He was used to Chieko’s advances. “She is human. She would only bear hanyō children. And I have no patience for inexperienced women.”

Chieko smiled, putting the pipe down on the floor before she reached into Sesshōmaru’s trousers. “Just as I have no patience for weak men,” she said, teasing him for a little while before she pushed her skirt aside and sank down on him with a blissful sigh. “And you are a fine specimen of the ones that I desire.”

Sesshōmaru closed his eyes for a moment, giving in to her warmth and tightness around him. It was an agreement between them that each time he came to her to hide from the world, she would get to enjoy him – almost like a forbidden fruit that she was only allowed to taste on special occasions. If she had not been the freedom-loving woman that she was, he would have taken her as a mistress already. Chieko was one of the very few women that managed to entice him. Also because she expected nothing of their union. She was not desperate to become pregnant, or to get his affection. She merely enjoyed what she was doing, and oh, she was doing it well.

“I don’t understand why your wife does not conceive,” Chieko hummed as she moved slowly on his lap, running her hands through his long, silver hair. “I have had to cleanse myself twice after being with you.”

Sesshōmaru huffed, leaning his head against the wall as he grabbed Chieko’s hips. “Don’t you feel it,” he murmured. “The way your body responds to mine. How it is desperate to have me inside you. How your womb demands to drink from me.”

“I do,” Chieko sighed, the feeling of him pushing against her cervix almost driving her mad. “What a shame if your wife does not feel the same… but you see… human women make excellent lovers for yōkai.” She smirked at him knowingly. “I have experience, you see. They are so eager to please. And so willing if you only treat them right.”

A brief knock on the door interrupted their session, but Chieko did not seem surprised. “Come in,” she said, much to Sesshōmaru’s confusion.

A young woman entered, kneeling down in front of them to bow in greeting as if the people in front of her were not currently in a compromising position. She was dressed like a servant in a simple, cotton yukata that was a little bit too tight around the chest and hips for her, but Sesshōmaru had the feeling that this was intentional.

“My student,” Chieko said, gesturing at the girl by the door. “Masako comes from a wealthy family and wishes to learn the art of a courtesan.”

In the West, such a thing would have been unthinkable. But here in the North, Sesshōmaru remembered, the profession of the courtesans was a respectable one, and only the most beautiful ones were chosen to entertain the rich and powerful. Most of them were hanyō, and versed in the entertainment of both species. And Chieko was one of the most popular courtesans in the entire realm. Being her student was a great honour, and Sesshōmaru was sure that Chieko hardly accepted any girls to learn from her.

“You don’t mind if she’s here to learn, do you?” Chieko asked Sesshōmaru, raising a perfect eyebrow. “I told her to come once someone managed to break my seal.”

Sesshōmaru huffed, lowering his head to lick over Chieko’s neck. “Accepted.”

Chieko smiled and beckoned the girl to come a little closer. “You are in for a treat, Masako-chan,” she said. “Before you sits the heir to the Western throne. And here, he is completely at my mercy.”

Sesshōmaru growled against her neck. “Be careful with your words,” he murmured.

Chieko chuckled, moving her hips slowly on his lap. “You see how he is holding back, Masako-chan? He could easily overpower me, but he chooses not to. I have him in my grasp. And that is what they like. Come closer. Put your hand on my belly.”

Sesshōmaru was a little confused, not sure what Chieko was planning, but he would not interfere. It was a new situation even to him, to have one woman on his lap and have another woman watch them. Masako sat down beside Chieko, placing her hand on her teacher’s belly. Chieko took it and guided it a little deeper, pressing it against her soft flesh.

“Can you feel him inside me?” She sighed blissfully. “A daiyōkai that is made to procreate will always feel like this to you. Soon you will get to feel the same, Masako. Just be patient.”

Chieko moved her hips a little faster, letting out a soft moan as Sesshōmaru gave her a sudden, sharp thrust to tease her. He could not remember how often he had mated with this woman already, but each time, it ended for him with a clearer head. And yet, he did not love her. Chieko was an acquaintance. A yōkai equal to him in power and intelligence.

But definitely not marriage material.

It had become dark outside in the meantime, and as Chieko finally cried out and brought Sesshōmaru over the edge as well, it seemed that they had enjoyed each other for a little eternity – just the way yōkai did it when they were given the time.

“I have only one condition this time,” Chieko sighed as she played with Sesshōmaru’s hair. “Well, more a wish than a condition, really. I would never dare to order you around, my friend.”

Sesshōmaru smirked. “What is it.”

“If you want to stay here for a while, let Masako-chan get her experiences with you,” Chieko said and moved closer to him to whisper into his ear. “She is untouched. You won’t regret it.”

Sesshōmaru huffed. This was not what he had had in mind when coming to Aomori. But what he needed was peace and quiet, something to distract him from what was waiting for him at the palace.

Perhaps the women would give him the kind of distraction he needed.

“Fine.”

*******

Empress Yonoko was watching her husband attentively, her golden eyes following him as he paced the room, refusing to sit down. It had been like this for several hours, and no matter what she said, he would not take a seat. In some way, she understood why, but pacing the room would not shorten their wait. Kagura sat in the corner, fanning herself lightly as she pretended to read a book, but her red eyes never moved, and she never turned the pages. She was just as tense as Tōga, but had a very different way of showing it.

Not long ago, a healer had rushed into Tōga’s study to inform him that the Lady Izayoi had gone into labour after tripping over a root in the garden. Tōga had immediately rushed to his wife’s chambers, only to be sent out again by the midwives. And now, all he could do was to wait for release.

Rin, who had slept unusually long that day, had heard about the developments from her maids as they had come to her room to serve breakfast. Rin, however, had immediately rushed to Izayoi’s rooms, only to end up in the same room as the others. Tōga looked up only briefly as she came in, continuing to pace the room, rubbing his face nervously as he did so.

“Now stop crying,” Yonoko said with a small sigh as Inuyasha, who sat in front of her, began to whimper. Rin quickly reached for the child and lifted him into her arms, gently bouncing him to soothe the upset child that obviously missed his mother. The screams that reached them from the end of the hallway were heart-clenching, and even a child as small as Inuyasha knew that this was an exceptional situation.

“Shh,” Rin whispered, holding Inuyasha close to her chest. “Yurikago no uta o, kanariya ga utau yo, nenneko nenneko, nenneko yo… Yurikago no ue ni, iwa no mi ga yureru yo, nenneko nenneko, nenneko yo…”

Yonoko frowned a little as Rin began to sing this unusual lullaby, but it seemed to soothe the little boy, who curled up in Rin’s arms, his small hands clutching her kimono tightly. Even Kagura had lifted her gaze, watching Rin with mild interest as the girl slowly walked up and down to keep Inuyasha calm while his mother gave birth to her second child.

Down the hallway, a midwife cooled the forehead of the Lady Izayoi with a wet cloth whilst another worked between her legs. The chants of the monks that sat outside and prayed were ringing in the young woman’s ears, and she had long left the realm of reality. The midwife had seen it many times before – a long, painful delivery brought almost every woman to the verge of insanity.

“The chants of Buddha,” Izayoi whispered. “It is near…”

“We are almost done here, Mylady,” the midwife said calmly. “Just a few more pushes, yes?”

Izayoi groaned in agony. “Will I die?” She breathed, leaning into the midwife’s touch as she patted her head.

“No, Mylady,” the midwife said softly. “Everything is fine. You are just very exhausted. And the chants you are hearing are coming from the monks that are praying outside, just for you. The holy Buddha and the spirits of these lands will guide you on your way.”

“My sister,” Izayoi murmured. “I need to see my sister…”

“You do not have a sister, Mylady,” the midwife reminded her gently. “Do you mean one of your ladies? Yona-san is here.”

Yona, who had been kneeling on the other side of the futon, grasped Izayoi’s hand firmly. “I am here, Mylady,” she said. “I will not leave your side.”

“Rin,” Izayoi whispered, finally opening her eyes. “I need to see Rin.”

Yona and the midwife exchanged a surprised look, but they were smart enough to not start a discussion in such a moment. A maid was sent out to the waiting family, who all jumped on the spot as the door was suddenly opened. Tōga spun around, looking at the young woman expectantly.

“The Lady Izayoi wishes to see Lady Rin, your majesty,” the maid said shyly as she bowed.

Rin paled instantly.

“Give him to me,” Tōga said and reached for his son. “Quick, go with her.”

Rin placed the now calm Inuyasha in Tōga’s arms before she rushed down the hallway with the maid, her heart beating rapidly in her chest as she thought in horror of the scenes she had witnessed in Aomori, where slave women gave birth to their children without the help of midwives – often with dramatic consequences.

But the imperial standards were very different, of course. Two midwives, two healers, and several maids had gathered around Izayoi, who lay on her futon and looked terribly weak. Rin’s heart skipped a beat at her sight, and for a moment, she believed that the woman was dead. But Izayoi stirred, and she opened her eyes as Rin sat down beside her and took her hand.

“Now I have new strength,” she whispered. “After seeing my sister, I know that I will be fine.”

“You will be more than that,” Rin said quietly and kissed her hand. “I am here. I will help you.”

“You need to push when the next contraction comes, Mylady,” the midwife who sat between her legs said. “The child is eager to see the world.”

“Did you hear that?” Rin asked, moving a little closer and stroking Izayoi’s hair. “You will have your baby soon.”

Izayoi smiled lightly. “I hope it is a girl,” she murmured.

“You need to help her to sit up a bit,” the midwife said. “Quick.”

With the help of the second midwife, Rin pulled Izayoi into a half-sitting position, letting her lean against her as the next contraction hit her, and Izayoi cried out in pain, her nails digging into her bare thighs as she pushed as hard as she could.

“Well done! Well done, Mylady!” The midwife called. “The head is born! A full head of silver hair!”

“You are doing so well, Mylady!” Yona exclaimed, squeezing her hand gently. Izayoi gasped for air, falling back against Rin and the other midwife. Rin knew that Izayoi would not last much longer – she was tired, she was exhausted, and probably had not eaten for several hours. The midwives knew that, too. They needed to deliver the child quickly.

“One more push, and we are done, Mylady,” the midwife said, patting her knee gently. “Get the towels ready for the prince or princess.”

Her words promptly caused a commotion in the background as the maids rushed to get everything ready while Izayoi prepared for the final contraction. She was incredibly pale, and Rin prayed that she would not be too exhausted once it was over. Losing her would drive Tōga insane.

“Now take a deep breath, Mylady,” the midwife to her left said as Izayoi groaned in pain. “And push when the time comes. Yes, that’s it!”

Izayoi screamed in pain, and from afar Rin believed to hear the desperate cries of a man. She could not blame him. Everyone knew how much Tōga loved Izayoi, and that he could not bear to see her in pain or distress. But this was the natural process of birth, and nothing he could help with.

“Well done, Mylady! Well done!” The midwife called, pulling the child out of her and wrapping it into a towel as she reached for a knife to cut the umbilical cord. Immediately, the soft cries of a baby filled the room, and everyone exhaled audibly in relief. Rin, however, had only eyes for Izayoi, who had promptly fainted.

“She needs fresh air!” Rin called and began to fan Izayoi. “And water!”

Fortunately, Izayoi stirred after a moment only, and as she was lowered down onto her pillow again, she turned her head towards Rin and Yona.

“My baby,” she whispered. “Where is my baby?”

“Right there, Mylady,” Yona said with tears in her eyes. “The maids are bathing it for you.”

“Why is it so quiet?” She asked, her eyes filled with worry. “Why is my baby so quiet?”

“Because it is well-behaved,” Rin said with a smile and pushed a strand of hair out of Izayoi’s red face. “Look, there it comes.”

A maid had approached the futon and knelt down beside them, carrying a tiny bundle in her arms. “It is a boy, Mylady,” she said as she carefully placed the baby in Izayoi’s arms. “A perfectly healthy little boy.”

“Oh my,” Izayoi breathed, her eyes beginning to sparkle in joy as she saw her baby for the first time. “Oh hello, my little angel…”

The boy was absolutely stunning, even for a newborn baby, who often looked like crumpled cushions. He had his father’s silver hair and the same ears as Inuyasha, and even very fine, purple marking on his cheeks. His face, however, had Izayoi’s shape, and it was very clear that one day, he would be a very handsome, male copy of his mother.

“It is time, Mylady,” the midwife said calmly. “We must deliver the afterbirth and his majesty needs to see his son.”

Izayoi nodded and shifted a little, touching Rin’s arm. “Take him to his father, please,” she said, carefully placing the tiny bundle in Rin’s arms. Rin swallowed thickly, aware of the great honour that it was to present the child to the emperor, but she was determined to not let Izayoi down.

Carefully, she rose, holding the baby boy close to her chest as she walked out of the room and down the hallway, where a bunch of guards were standing outside the door, as if to make sure that the emperor did not barge in and interrupt the midwives as they worked. They let Rin pass without question, opening the door for her so she could enter.

Tōga spun around immediately, his face as white as a sheet as he looked at Rin, his gaze falling onto the bundle she was carrying. Yonoko and Kagura sat up properly, looking at Rin expectantly.

“It is a boy, your majesty,” Rin said softly and held the child out to him as he walked through the room towards her with outstretched hands. For a moment, she believed to see him tremble, but as he took the child into his arms, she knew that he would be fine. It was not the first time he held a newborn, and the child instinctively curled up against his chest, as if it knew that Tōga meant no harm. That he was its father.

“How is Izayoi doing?” Tōga asked in a breathy voice, stroking his son’s cheek.

“She is doing well, your majesty,” Rin replied calmly. “She is very exhausted.”

“Understandable,” Yonoko said from her seat by the window. “You should go to her, dearest.”

Tōga did not need the encouragement of his principal wife for that. He had already left the room and made his way down the hall to Izayoi’s chambers with bouncy steps.

Yonoko sighed and rose from her cushion. “Well then, it is done. At last. It seems that my husband’s greatest talent is fathering sons.” She threw her hair over her shoulder and glanced at Kagura, who was still sitting in the corner and looking down at her lap. She was very pale.

“Hopefully that is something that my son has inherited,” Yonoko said. “Rin, dear, I would like to speak to you this afternoon. Join me for tea, then, yes? I have an important visitor to take care of first.”

Rin blinked in surprise and quickly stammered that she would be there, but Yonoko had already left the room in the most majestic fashion, her hips swaying a little as she made her way towards the gates. She was in a good, yet very thoughtful mood.

A very gentle, quiet sob pulled Rin out of her thoughts, and as she turned her head, she found Kagura sitting in the corner, covering her mouth with her hand as the tears rolled down her cheeks. Rin froze. She had never seen Kagura upset, or showing any sort of great emotion at all. But here she was, crying because of a reason that Rin did not know.

“Do not pity me,” Kagura muttered suddenly, shaking her head before Rin could even open her mouth. “So many people do that already. They watch as I become more and more worthless with each son that is born to the emperor. By a human woman, even. And I? I can’t even conceive…”

Rin did not know what to say. It was true, the people at court were talking about Sesshōmaru’s and Kagura’s lack of children, but she would have never thought that it affected Kagura so much. Most of the time, Kagura was the most confident woman she knew, and no one ever dared to cross her. But seeing her like this, so vulnerable and sad, broke Rin’s heart.

She sat down beside Kagura and waited until the other woman had calmed down a little before she said: “The gods will bless you when the right time comes. I have heard they have only three answers to our wishes. Yes, Not Yet, and I have something better for you.” She slowly reached out for Kagura’s hand, intertwining their fingers. She did not have a lot to do with her, but their lives were connected due to the husband they shared. “Trust in the gods, Kagura,” Rin said. “And they will hear your prayers.”

Kagura sniffed, drying her tears with the sleeve of her kimono as she looked down at Rin with the red eyes that had scared Rin so much in the beginning.

“Why are you nice to me?” She asked her in a husky voice.

“Because you are nice to me, too,” Rin said. That was not exactly true – Kagura ignored Rin most of the time, but she had never been mean to her, at least. For Rin, that counted as kindness.

Kagura looked away, withdrawing her hand from Rin’s gentle grip. “You should go and prepare for the tea with Yonoko-sama,” she said and rose, pulling herself together within a second. “She will have many things to say.”

Rin said nothing as Kagura walked away, holding her head high as if nothing had happened at all, as if she had not just shown her weaker side to another person.

Yōkai were extraordinary beings, that much Rin had always known. But despite their differences it was remarkable how similar their lives were to the ones of humans. And their worries, too.


	11. Motherly Advice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back! :)

Yonoko had known many women in her long life so far. As the lives of men and women were separated at court, the majority of people that she spent her time with were women, and over the course of the centuries, she had seen it all. The carefree, the rich, the poor, the obedient, the headstrong, the ugly, and the beautiful. The latter had never been a reason for her to worry, although her husband had never been able to resist a pretty face. But he had always known that there could only be one principal wife. Only one empress. Therefore, Yonoko had always been sure about her position at court. She had never felt threatened by any of her husband’s concubines, and she never would be.

Therefore, she did not feel threatened by Rin, but the girl intrigued her and made her worry at the same time. Rin was different from the other women at court, and Yonoko was aware of the effect that the former slave girl had on men. However, she doubted that Rin was aware of it at all.

Sometimes, Yonoko thought, it was necessary to offer guidance to the younger generation. Rin had no family of her own to turn to. Izayoi was like a sister to her, but a sister could never replace the wise teachings of a mother. Therefore, Yonoko had decided to take Rin under her wings until she could manage on her own.

The girl looked at her shyly as she was taken into her drawing room, where Yonoko sat on a cushion and had a maid comb her hair for the third time that day. Another maid was kneeling to her feet and serving tea while Mizuki sat next to the empress, watching Rin with mild interest. As Yonoko’s lady-in-waiting, Mizuki enjoyed the trust of the empress, and was allowed to be present in moments like these.

“Please, take a seat, dearest,” Yonoko said, gesturing at the free cushion. “Tell me, how is Lady Izayoi doing?”

Rin swallowed thickly, sitting down carefully and clasping her small hands on her lap. She was not used to speaking to the empress, and she was terribly nervous, but she had to pull herself together. And so, she inclined her head to her, lowering her gaze as she spoke.

“The Lady I-Izayoi is doing well, your majesty. She is w-with her baby at the moment.”

“Ah, yes. Good.” Yonoko reached for her cup and took a small sip. “I assume they will choose a name for the little prince soon. Traditionally, the father chooses the name of his firstborn son, and the mother may name the second born. Did you know that?”

Rin shook her head.

“There is a lot that you do not know yet,” Yonoko said calmly, holding the cup between her slender, pale fingers. “Which is not your fault, of course. You come from another realm, and from a very different background than what we are used to. This makes you an exotic, you see. And many people are interested in exotic things. Especially men.”

Her words sent shivers down Rin’s spine, and her heart skipped a beat as she thought once more of what Tōga had said to her. What he had implied. What if the empress knew about it, and she had called Rin to her rooms to threaten her that she better stayed away from her husband?

“Whilst my son may not be interested in you, other men certainly are,” Yonoko said and studied Rin curiously. “Mizuki-san has heard a group of young courtiers speak about you, and praise your beauty. Apparently, some of them were even wondering how to gain your attention, now that Sesshōmaru is not at the palace anymore. Men, you see, have a fondness for all things they deem exciting or exotic. But we women are no objects.” She put the cup down on the table and clasped her hands elegantly on her lap. “You know so very little of men, my dear. How could anyone expect you to know how to handle my stubborn son, then? Although I must admit that you defended yourself rather well at the banquet. Kouga-sama was rather impressed.”

She held out her hand and a beautiful fan was placed in her palm a second later. Rin could not help but admire Yonoko for the way she behaved. In everything she did she was the perfect empress, and always in control of the people around her. She demanded to be served in full submission whilst never appearing arrogant. She was imperious, but in a way that deserved respect.

“If you can handle Kouga-sama, then you can handle my son, too. They are the same, essentially. Young men who think that they know everything.” Yonoko had begun to fan herself again. “But we both know that this is not true. Women mature earlier than men, you see. In body and in spirit. Come.” She rose elegantly from her cushion and threw her hair over her shoulders. “Let us go outside for a bit.”

Rin rose as well, smoothing out her kimono as she rushed to follow the empress. She still had no idea why Yonoko had called for her, and what it was that she wanted to speak about. Surely she had not just called for her to lecture her about the ways of men?

The garden of the empress was a spectacular one, but Rin could not enjoy its beauty, as nervous as she was. Yonoko, on the other hand, seemed to pay no attention to the scenery at all. She was used to it, and whilst she found the place beautiful, it offered her nothing new.

Rin walked a few steps behind her, just the way she had been taught by Izayoi, keeping her eyes fixed on the ground as she followed the empress through the garden. Every now and then, she glanced at Yonoko, who seemed lost in her thoughts. She was truly an impressive sight. Her mokomoko was wrapped around her shoulders like a warming cloak, and the hem of her kimono seemed to float above the ground as she walked. It was this unique way to walk that Rin admired about the women at court, and she was sure that she would never be able to do it like them.

“There have been rumours,” Yonoko said eventually, playing with the fan in her hands. “Rumours about my son, you see. That he, despite being married and having two wives, is without an heir. Without offspring. I think I do not have to explain to what kind of assumptions these rumours might lead.” She turned around to Rin, studying her attentively. “I am sure that you have already wondered yourself why Kagura is still childless, after such a long time. There are two reasons for this. Firstly, she is not of our kind. She is a wind sorceress, not a dog demoness. Consequently, it is more difficult for yōkai of two different kinds to procreate. Secondly, it seems that while Sesshōmaru respects Kagura, his affection for her does not go beyond that. Otherwise, he would mate with her more frequently, and not merely out of duty.”

She sighed deeply, in an almost dramatical way. “I wish he would realise what kind of situation he is in, and that running away from his responsibilities will only make it worse!” Yonoko shook her pretty head. “The rumours would vanish and his position at court would be secured if he only had a child of his own!”

Yonoko began to fan herself again, as if she had to force herself to remain calm. “You see, Rin, it is of utter importance that Sesshōmaru secures his position at his father’s court. Otherwise, he might lose his claim to the throne to one of his brothers and-“

“Forgive me,” Rin whispered, lowering her head respectfully. “But I do not understand why you would think that I would help him, Mylady.”

Yonoko blinked in surprise, staring at the young girl. It was indeed no myth that Rin was clever, despite the fact she did not speak much, and she had seen right through Yonoko’s little speech. She knew what the empress was planning to ask of her, and she was not shy to voice her objections.

Yonoko cleared her throat. “Because he is your husband,” she said. “And therefore, you have an obligation to support him.”

But Rin frowned. “I do not see why I should support him in any way, especially due to the way he treats me in both public as well as in private.”

“But you must surely wish for children of your own?”

“I do, your majesty, but I highly doubt that my husband will lie with me due to my human nature and the fact he regards me as some sort of insult to his eye.” Rin knew that she had to remain respectful when speaking to the empress, but she also knew from Izayoi that she did not have to hold back her opinions when speaking to her or the emperor. After all, she was also a member of the imperial family now. “If my husband were showing a different behaviour towards me, then I would consider helping him, of course. But at the moment, there is no true marriage between us.”

Yonoko would have never admitted that she was impressed – but she was. Rin did not speak often, but when she did, she voiced her opinions clearly and did not shy away from saying what she thought. Not even to her, the empress.

And so, Yonoko clasped her hands elegantly right above her obi. “I understand,” she said with a small nod. “As a free woman, you have every right to refuse him. And I have not called you to me to give you orders. I assume that this is all Sesshōmaru’s fault. If he only treated his women better he would have less trouble. He should use his father as an example, who invited women to his bed and lets them go when they cannot find the words to refuse him.”

Rin stared at Yonoko in shock, her heart skipping a beat as she realised that Yonoko knew, but the empress remained completely calm.

“Do you think you are the first woman that he tries to seduce?” Yonoko asked, her voice surprisingly gentle and almost understanding. “He has never been able to resist a pretty face. And believe me when I say that it would be perfectly decent if you followed him to his bed. As long as one knows to whom one belongs, it is all perfectly fine. I have my lovers, too, after all.” She reached out to touch Rin’s cheek, studying her face curiously. “I assume that you refused him of two reasons. One of them is your insecurity, and the other one is Izayoi. You do not want to hurt her feelings. That is only natural for humankind, I believe. That is why Tōga is so fond of you. You are so very different from yōkai, you see.”

She let go of Rin’s cheek and smiled at her, showing off her fangs. “But how would you know all these things? You are not from our realm, and you have a very different upbringing. You have no mother that could tell you those things. Therefore, I will take you under my wings until you know how to play men like a fiddle. It is one of the few joys exclusive to women, you know.” As a few raindrops fell from the sky Yonoko looked up. “Come. Let us go back inside.”

Rin’s heart was beating fast in her chest as she followed Yonoko back to her rooms, trying to understand what was happening. She had defended herself in front of the empress, and whilst she had been speaking freely, she had not been punished. Although Yonoko knew that Tōga had tried to seduce her, she was not angry. She seemed merely… surprised at Rin’s reaction to his advances.

It seemed that yōkai had very different morals and values.

Yonoko sat down on the tatami mats again, leaning against a large cushion with a deep sigh. “You are untouched,” she said to Rin and gestured at the floor to have her sit with her. “My son is not exactly fond of unexperienced women, as he regards them a tedious business. My husband, on the other hand, is very different. I agree with you that Sesshōmaru will most likely never lie with you. But should you ever find yourself to be curious, then you should consider to accept his majesty’s advances. I can assure you that you would not regret spending the night with him.”

Rin looked down at her hands, playing with the sleeve of her kimono. It all sounded so surreal. No human woman would have ever advised her daughter-in-law to sleep with her husband. But Yonoko was not human, and neither was the emperor. And although Yonoko had said that it was perfectly fine for men and women to have affairs, even when they were married, it sounded strange to Rin. This was unlike everything she had known.

“I wish my son were aware of the jewel that his father gifted him,” Yonoko said softly, and Rin looked up at her, blushing at the compliment. “You are a good girl. I dare to say that you would even have the power to change him if he were not the obstinate silly little boy that he is.”

***********

Yonoko’s words were still ringing in Rin’s head hours later, and she could not help but worry. If the empress knew about Tōga’s attempt to follow him to his bedchamber, then Izayoi surely knew about it as well. Perhaps Izayoi had even expected such a thing to happen when she had accepted the invitation for her. And she had done so without warning her, without telling her what might happen.

Had she just thrown her into the lion’s den on purpose?

The only way to find out was to ask her, although Rin would have preferred to stay hidden in her room, away from the curious stares of the court. Everyone knew that Izayoi had called for her as she had given birth, and not everyone seemed to like the fact that the secondary wife of the emperor got along so well with the one that had been a slave not so long ago. But Rin could hardly believe it, either. She still felt very much like before. Beautiful clothes and endless spare time had not changed much. That was just what the world got to see, after all. Deep down, Rin still felt very little, and very weak. The life she lived now seemed surreal to her still, and she was sure that she did not deserve any of it. She had merely been lucky that the emperor was so fond of humans, and that he had felt responsible for her.

One day, she would return the favour. But she did not know how.

Izayoi was still resting in bed, exhausted from giving birth, but she seemed happy. She looked up as Rin was taken inside by Yona, gently bouncing the bundle in her arms as she smiled at her in the most genuine way. Rin returned the smile and sat down beside her, clasping her hands on her lap. Izayoi was still pale, but some colour had already returned to her cheeks and her hair had been combed to make her look presentable for all the visitors that would come.

“Is he not perfect?” Izayoi asked softly as she looked down at her baby boy, kissing his silver head of hair.

Rin nodded. “He is,” she agreed. The prince was a gorgeous child, despite the fact he looked like a crumpled cushion at the moment. He was just a few hours old, after all.

“Tōga and I have been thinking about a name for him,” Izayoi said. “He shall be called Hikaru. Like my father.”

“That is a nice name,” Rin said with a small smile. “Does it have a meaning, too?”

“It means ‘the radiant’,” Izayoi explained. “And is that not fitting? I mean, look at him.” She sighed dreamily and held her baby closer. “My little Hikaru.” She kissed his forehead and then looked up at Rin. “Do you want to hold him?”

Before Rin could reply she had been given the prince, and she held him carefully in her arms, looking down at him in awe. All babies were beautiful, but she had never seen a newborn hanyō before.

“You will be a great mother one day,” Izayoi said softly. “Look how easily you hold him. And how safe and loved he feels with you.”

Rin loved children, but she was sure that she would never have any of her own. Not with a husband like Sesshōmaru, who openly despised her merely for being human. And the mere thought of having to sleep with him, to have a child of a man like him, sent cold shivers down her spine.

“Izayoi,” Rin murmured, placing Hikaru in her arms again. “Did you know that his majesty would ask me to come to his bedchamber when you answered the invitation in my name?”

Izayoi blinked in surprise as she took her son back, holding him close as she seemed to search for the right words. “I… I swear that I was sure he would only like to speak to you about the incident at the feast,” she said emphatically. “I did not think that he would ask such a thing of you right away, Rin. Please forgive me. I should have been more careful.”

Rin shook her head. “His words are not yours,” she said softly. “And besides, he let me go.”

“What did you say to him?”

“Nothing,” Rin answered and lowered her head. “I was too… too shocked to speak.”

Izayoi reached out for her hand. “I am sure that Tōga is terribly sorry,” she said. “Upsetting you is the last thing he would want, believe me.”

“Even the empress knew,” Rin said with a frown. “How would she know such a thing?”

Izayoi smiled lightly. “Because she knows him well,” she said. “And the morals and values are different for yōkai. They do not know marital loyalty the way most humans do. And it is different for courtly life anyway.”

“Yonoko-sama told me, yes,” Rin said with a deep sigh and ran a hand through her hair. And then it all came out, and Rin told Izayoi everything about her conversation with the empress – including the things she had asked of her, and what she had said to her in return. Izayoi listened patiently, feeding her baby as she did so, and as Rin had finished she said nothing for a while, thinking about the right way to answer.

“It is true that there are rumours, and you were absolutely right to refuse this request of hers,” Izayoi said. “Sesshōmaru does not deserve your attention, and especially not your body. Always protect your pride, Rin.” She shifted a little on her futon before she continued. “But she is right about Tōga. You certainly would not regret spending a night with him. I never did. And look where I am now.” She put Hikaru down into his cot, where the little boy fell asleep on the spot.

“I am not you, Izayoi,” Rin said quietly. “I could never… I mean…” She sighed deeply. “He is your husband. And I’m…”

“You may be Sesshōmaru’s wife, but do not consider yourself bound to him,” Izayoi said dryly. “What you have can hardly be called a marriage. You owe him nothing. You are a free woman now, and you can do as you please. And besides…” She cleared her throat. “My beloved is… becoming a little impatient. Yonoko-sama refuses to mate with him these days because she is fertile and wishes to avoid another pregnancy. And I am unable to lie with him, as much as I would like that. Of course there are concubines to whom he could go, but I do not know much about these women. I don’t know if they would be good for him. Unlike you.” She smiled warmly at Rin, taking her hand and intertwining their fingers. “I would not be angry if you chose to respond to his advances, Rin. I want you to know that. Of all people, I’d be most comfortable with you. Tōga is a good man, gentle and kind in every way. And should you decide to include the aspect of physical love into your new life, then you should consider sharing it with him. Do not give yourself and your pride to the first man that comes along, Rin. Give it to someone that respects you for who you are.”

That was not what Rin had expected Izayoi to say, but based on what she now knew about courtly life and the ways of the people here, it all made perfect sense. The only thing that made it hard for her to understand it all was the fact that it was so completely different from what she had known her whole life. She lived a life in true freedom now. She was not bound to anyone, not even to the man she had to call her husband.

Sesshōmaru had no power over her.

The one who shaped her life was only Rin herself.

“Will you show me how to live in freedom?” Rin asked quietly.

Izayoi smiled and wrapped her arms around her. “The world is only waiting for you, my beloved sister.”


	12. The Freedom of Her Mind

Chieko hummed a happy tune as she walked down the busy streets of Aomori, followed by a rather stoic-looking daiyōkai. It was a cool yet sunny day, perfect for a walk through the town, but of course, Chieko had business to do. Yōkai needed to eat, too, and there were a few bits and pieces that she needed to get from the shops. And so, she had left her home right after breakfast, accompanied by her guest and her young student, who walked a few steps behind them and carried Chieko’s bag. Wherever they went, they were greeted with respect, and whenever they ran into a former customer, Chieko would introduce Masako proudly.

Sesshōmaru remained in the background. He had only joined Chieko and Masako because he needed some fresh air, and thanks to a cloak he had borrowed from them no one recognised him. It felt good to wander through the streets of Aomori without the curious glances of the people. He had enough of those at home. Here, he could be free to some extent, even if he could not stay forever. Sooner or later, he would have to return to the West. His father expected him there.

“Hm, I think I will take this one here,” Chieko said and gestured at a small bottle. The merchant nodded and began to wrap the perfume into some paper.

“An excellent choice,” he said. “It is very popular among the courtesans of Aomori, especially for students.”

“I know,” Chieko said with a small smile. “But you see, I will change it a little. To make it unique. No student of mine shall ever wear the perfume that everyone else wears.”

The merchant laughed. “How clever you are, Chieko-sama,” he said and handed her the perfume. “Now tell me, when will she have her debut?”

“Once she is ready,” Chieko smiled and glanced at Masako, who promptly lowered her gaze respectfully. “But she is most promising, I can assure you. She will become a much-loved entertainer for the rich and powerful.”

Sesshōmaru, who was leaning against the wall, huffed. That was a nice way of putting it, he thought. Once the girl was ready, she would become employed as the personal entertainer of a noble family. But he doubted that she would be much-loved. It did not matter where one was, he thought. Men always wanted only one thing. His own father was no exception. He had fallen in love with Lady Izayoi’s beauty, first and foremost. Only then he had been interested enough to get to know her personality, too.

Once they had left the shop again, Chieko linked her arm with his for a moment. “I can see you frown despite the cloak,” she said, looking up at him. “I bet you have the most gorgeous smile.”

Sesshōmaru frowned. “I am not here to distribute silly smiles,” he said and withdrew himself from her grasp.

Chieko sighed. “You know, a smile every now and then would certainly improve your relationship with your wives. Right now, you scare away even babies with that face.”

They turned around a corner and promptly ran into another customer of Chieko, who greeted her and Masako exuberantly. Sesshōmaru rolled his eyes and kept on walking until he reached the bridge, and he decided to wait for them there. He sat down and let his eyes wander, watching the other side of the river.

A group of young women stood on a wooden pedestal. They wore thin, short yukata and their hands were tied together, just like their feet. A man was walking up and down in front of the pedestal, talking to the people standing around him and praising his ware. A few meters to the left an old woman dragged a young girl in a short yukata behind a curtain, followed by a group of wealthy-looking men who appeared to be servants of the state. Identical-looking women, apparently twins, were holding onto each other tightly, crying and screaming as they were pulled away from each other and dragged towards different carriages. A man standing by one of the carriages pulled out a whip, lashing out for one of the women to make her shut up.

“There you are,” Chieko said as she suddenly appeared next to him with Masako. “We just happened to run into a dear old friend of mine. He already asked to enjoy Masako-chan some time.” She chuckled.

Sesshōmaru did not look away from the women.

“What is this?” He asked Chieko.

“Huh?” Chieko followed his gaze. “Oh, that. The slave markets. The one for the women. To make sure they don’t couple with the males.”

Sesshōmaru watched as the other twin was pulled into the carriage, her hand reaching out of the window towards her sister.

“I knew that slavery was still allowed in the North,” he said eventually. “But I thought there were restrictions on how to handle the slaves.”

“There are, yes,” Chieko said. “But only for their treatment within the homes of their owners. The slave markets are an exception, I guess. I mean, they must keep them under control somehow, must they not?”

Sesshōmaru rose from the bench and huffed. “Even I know that separating siblings in the name of slavery is cruel,” he said and walked away.

Chieko raised an eyebrow, watching him disappear in the crowd. Masako moved a little closer to her to let a carriage pass. “Will we not follow him?” She asked her teacher in confusion. But Chieko only shook her head and clasped her hands right above her obi as she let her gaze wander to the other side of the river. This sight was nothing new to her. She had lived in Aomori for many years, for centuries, even. It had always been like this.

“I believe he is going home,” she said eventually. “He has something new to think about now.”

“Huh?” Masako blinked in surprise. „What do you mean?”

Chieko chuckled. “His little wife, of course.”

*******

The bathing house was located within the inner chambers of the palace, meant for the imperial family and those belonging to them only. It was a rather social place, too. In the mornings and afternoons, the women of the inner circle would meet there to not only wash themselves, but to see their friends and chat with them in a safe and almost secret environment. In the evenings, the bathing house belonged to the men. But as neither the emperor nor his eldest son found the time for such idleness, many women gathered in the bath after dinner for some more enjoyment before going to bed.

Rin preferred to go to the bathing house in the mornings. It had quickly become her favourite place right after the library, and soon, she had found some friends there. It was not exclusive to members of the imperial family only. Ladies-in-waiting as well as concubines were allowed to visit it as well, and they had quickly welcomed Rin to their meetings. From them, Rin learnt everything about the court life that everyone else lived – including the most scandalous gossip, secret love affairs and intrigues. Only through them she realised how sheltered her life as Sesshōmaru’s second wife was, and she gladly accepted these women as her friends.

Before giving birth to Hikaru, Izayoi had often come with her to the bathing house, but due to the fact that she still had to rest, Rin always went there alone. This morning, she had taken Inuyasha with her, and the other women cuddled and kissed the little prince, showering him in affection. Rin giggled and freed the little prince from the arms of the concubines as it became too much for him, holding him to her chest to soothe him.

“How is Lady Izayoi feeling these days?” A concubine named Ayumi asked her, leaning against the edge of the pool. “Will she be able to leave the bed soon?”

“I think so,” Rin replied. “She is feeling much better already, but it was a difficult and long birth. I believe that she will join us here again in two weeks or so, when the bleeding has stopped.”

“Right,” another concubine said. “I keep forgetting about the physique of humans.”

“It must be so annoying,” Ayumi said. “But his majesty is so very fond of humans nonetheless. Especially of Lady Izayoi. Who is a true jewel, of course. And a true beauty, too.”

Rin smiled. “That’s true. She is a beauty inside and out- hey there!” She laughed as Inuyasha had instinctively begun to suckle on her breast. “I’m the wrong person!”

“Does he get along with his wet nurse?” Ayumi asked curiously as Inuyasha whined when Rin pulled him away from her chest.

“I think he does,” Rin said, bouncing the little boy on her lap. “But some things just happen instinctively.”

Another concubine laughed. “Oh my. I remember when Sesshōmaru-sama was that young. He loved his wet nurse so much.”

“Right!” Ayumi said and began to chuckle. “He followed her everywhere.”

Rin often forgot that these women, despite looking so young, were much older than she was, and that they had known Sesshōmaru as a child already. To her, it seemed surreal to imagine him as anything else than the arrogant man that he was today. But of course he had been a child once, many years ago, and Rin wondered what had happened that had made him so bitter.

“I think you need your wet nurse now, hm?” She said to Inuyasha and held him closer as she climbed out of the water and reached for a towel, wrapping it around herself before she began to dry off the little boy, making him squeak in joy as she dried his silver hair. Afterwards, she put on her cotton yukata and wrapped a blanket around Inuyasha on her way out, humming a soft tune to the prince as she walked with him towards Izayoi’s rooms. A bath in the morning was indeed very refreshing, especially in the company of friends.

“Now we will find your nurse and then you can have some apple puree afterwards, hm?” Rin asked him softly. “Does that sound nice? Yes?”

Inuyasha beamed up at her, clapping his hands excitedly as she talked to him. Over the course of the last few months, he had become incredibly attached to her, and Izayoi often joked that he saw her as his second mother already. Rin chuckled, kissing the boy’s head lightly.

“What a wonderful sight that is!” A deep, male voice said.

Rin looked up and saw Tōga walk towards them. He was dressed in a blue morning yukata and wore his hair open for a change, similar to the way Sesshōmaru wore his. At the sight of his father Inuyasha began to squeak in excitement, and he reached out with his little hands for him.

“Your majesty,” Rin said softly and bowed respectfully to him as he approached them and reached for his son, patting his head gently.

“Good morning,” Tōga said with a smile. “Have you been to the bathing house?”

“Yes, Mylord,” Rin answered. “The prince enjoyed himself very much. But now he is hungry.”

“Ah, that’s my boy!” Tōga chuckled. “May I?” He gestured at his son.

Rin nodded and handed Inuyasha to his father. Inuyasha was babbling happily, tugging on his father’s hair as he was kissed and cuddled by him. It was a fascinating sight to Rin each time. Tōga loved his little son so dearly, and he was never shy to show his affection. Rin was sure that he would be just the same with Hikaru, and all the other children that would surely follow. Izayoi was young, not even twenty, and Rin knew that she wanted nothing more than a big family, as she had been an only child.

“Have you been behaving, hm?” Tōga asked Inuyasha and bounced him gently in his arms. “I’m very grateful that you take care of him these days, Rin. He is very fond of you. Just what he needs when his mother needs to rest.”

Rin blushed at the compliment and lowered her gaze respectfully. “I like spending time with him, Mylord.”

“So you like children, then?” Tōga asked, playing with Inuyasha’s ears, to which the boy responded with happy laughter.

“I do, Mylord.”

“That is wonderful,” Tōga said. “Perhaps you will have some of your own one day. I’m not giving up on my hopes that Sesshōmaru might change his stubborn attitude one day, you see.” He kissed Inuyasha’s cheek and gave him back to Rin, who accepted the boy with open arms.

“Unfortunately, I do not know where he is at the moment,” Tōga continued, clasping his hands behind his back. “I presume that he has left the West to sulk somewhere. But he will come back, eventually. And then he will apologise to you on his knees, you have my word.”

“He does not have to, Mylord,” Rin replied softly. “To be honest, his apology means nothing to me. I do not seek his respect.”

Tōga looked at Rin curiously for a long moment before a smile spread over his face, and he laughed in appreciation. “You have a strong mind, Lady Rin,” he said. “And you have finally found your voice. Which is a very beautiful one, if I may say so.” He glanced through the window at the rising sun and sighed. “Ah, I should go and get dressed. A messenger is waiting for me, and those people should be listened to as soon as possible. But I hope that we will see each other again soon? Perhaps for another round of gomoku? Tomorrow night?”

Rin knew that he was honest in his intentions, and Izayoi had told her that Tōga would be quite open about his suggestions to share the bed with him. But this meant nothing but a sincere invitation to play a board game with him.

“I would feel honoured, Mylord,” she said, holding Inuyasha a little closer.

Tōga smiled. “Excellent. Well then, Lady Rin, have a lovely day. And you too, Inuyasha. Wave at your Pa, will you?”

Inuyasha gurgled happily and raised his hand.

“That counts!” Tōga laughed and patted his head before he walked past them and down the hall towards the other gates.

Izayoi was awake and feeding Hikaru as Rin came to see her, and the young mother pulled Inuyasha immediately into her arms. She wanted to make sure that Inuyasha felt loved despite having a new sibling, but Inuyasha did not seem to care about these things at all. He curled up at his mother’s chest until his wet nurse came in, and he suckled happily on her bosom while Izayoi and Rin chatted about this and that.

“His majesty invited me for a round of gomoku for tomorrow evening,” Rin told her friend once they had settled on the futon with a bowl of fruit between them and Hikaru asleep next to them.

“Oh, that is lovely!” Izayoi said. “But remember, tomorrow is also Hikaru’s presentation to the court. There will be a feast and dances and everything.”

“Oh, right!” Rin said. “So does he expect me to join him after the feast?”

“I think so,” Izayoi replied. “But I don’t think that Tōga will be there for long. It is just a regular feast, you see. And they won’t get to see Hikaru or Inuyasha before their eighth birthdays again. That is how it is done here. Once they turn eight, they will start with their training, and that will be the day they will be allowed to explore the world outside the inner chambers.”

“Oh, I see,” Rin said in surprise. There were still things that she did not know, but she thought it a good idea to keep the children away from court, and close to their mother, where they were safe.

“Please, do me a favour and sit with Tōga at the feast, yes?” Izayoi said suddenly and took Rin’s hand. “Yonoko has left the palace for a few days now, and Kagura only attends a feast when Sesshōmaru is there. I don’t want my beloved to sit there on his own.”

Sitting next to Tōga was considered a huge compliment, and showed that she enjoyed his respect. It was a great honour, especially since she was not one of his wives, but belonged to the emperor’s son instead. But Rin had never been able to deny Izayoi a request.

“Of course,” Rin said and squeezed Izayoi’s hand in return. “I will be there.”

*******

It was only the second feast that Rin attended in her official function as Sesshōmaru’s wife, but this one was the most splendid.

It seemed that Tōga had not wasted a single thought about the cost of such an event. As Rin looked around that evening, she could barely take her eyes off the magnificent decoration, the delicious food, and the beautiful dancers that had been invited to entertain the courtiers. It was, after all, a joyful occasion. Everyone seemed happy that another prince had been born, and as Hikaru was presented to them in the arms of Rin, they bowed to the tiny baby boy as if it were a god. Rin found it very odd, but she remained quiet and returned Hikaru to a maid as soon as possible. A loud feast was not the right environment for such a small child in her opinion, and fortunately, Tōga seemed to agree. He was in a good mood, and he ate and drank a lot whilst talking to various people that Rin did not know. A few ladies came up to her and spoke to her, and Rin did her best to keep up with them, but she found their conversations rather exhausting. She was not used to such events, and after two hours only, she felt tired and her head started to hurt.

It was as if Tōga had read her mind. Far earlier than she had thought he rose from his cushion, ready to leave. Rin stood as well and followed him, taking a deep breath once they had stepped outside into the courtyard where it was quiet and almost peaceful.

Tōga laughed. “It was rather loud in there, was it not,” he said as they walked towards his rooms. “And the air was not very good either. But that is always the case when there is a feast and the room is full of people. You did very well tonight, by the way.”

Rin bowed her head and murmured a thankyou.

“I know that my Izayoi asked you to join me for the feast,” Tōga remarked with a small smile as he opened the doors to his drawing room. “She is a good woman. And she has a kind heart. And oh, she always worries about me.”

“But does that not show that she truly loves you, Mylord?” Rin asked as they took a seat at the table with the gomoku board between them.

“I think it does,” Tōga agreed as he settled on the cushion and waited for Rin to make the first move. “Tell me, Lady Rin, are you happy here? Is everything the way you hoped for?”

That question came unexpectedly, and Rin needed a moment to gather the words for the right answer. After all, she did not want to seem ungrateful. Tōga had done so much for her, and he seemed to expect nothing in return at all.

“I am very happy, Mylord,” Rin said and bowed to him. “Everyone is kind to me, and I have found friends.”

Tōga smiled. “That is good,” he said and reached for the board to make his move. He was able to play this game while blindfolded, it seemed. For Rin, it was almost impossible to win against a man like him, but it was not as if she did not try. In fact, she had made some interesting improvements in the past, and she had sometimes won against Izayoi or one of the other women. According to Izayoi, gomoku was a game that married couples liked to play. Of course, Sesshōmaru would never sit down and play this game with her, the very creature that he despised.

They played several rounds, occasionally speaking about this and that. Tōga was a gifted storyteller, and soon, Rin found herself laughing heartily as he told her the story of his first meeting with Yonoko. He was a genuinely nice man, she knew that now, and she had nothing to fear from him. In his presence, she felt appreciated, almost loved, even. He accepted her the way she was and did not expect her to change. In his presence, she could be open about everything, and so, she admitted to feeling purposeless every now and then.

Tōga was surprisingly understanding. To him, it absolutely made sense that a woman of her upbringing wanted something to do, and he promised to her that he would try to find something for her. Even if it was just a simple task.

It was almost midnight when Tōga looked out at the sky, his preferred method of telling the time. They had played countless rounds of gomoku and had spoken about so many different things that they had both forgotten about the time completely. But that was the sign of excellent company.

“Perhaps we should call it a day,” Tōga said eventually and rose from his cushion, holding out his hand for Rin to help her stand. She was grateful for the gesture, as she still found it difficult to get up in those heavy layers of her kimono. She took his hand and rose, but as she came to stand on her feet, she realised how close he suddenly was to her, and that he looked down at her with nothing but genuine kindness and warmth in his eyes.

“I hope I do not appear rude by saying this,” Tōga said calmly. “But I have enjoyed this evening very much. If you wish for it, you may find further enjoyment here tonight, with me.”

The indication in his words was clear to Rin, as she had been prepared for it by Izayoi, and she knew that she had the right to give any answer that she wanted. She could withdraw her hand and wish him a good night and just walk out. She could tell him no, and do just the same. She could tell him that she wished to remain untouched until her husband decided to claim her. She could even tell him that she did not desire him as a man at all.

But she could also say yes.

Rin thought of a conversation she had had with Izayoi a few days ago. A group of young men had stopped Rin in the garden because she had accidentally lost her fan, and they had all come together to give it to her. Izayoi had remarked that they were all good men from excellent families, and that tasting the cherry would not ruin the entire cake. Rin had understood her metaphor immediately. And yes, perhaps it would make things a little easier if she knew what the fuss was all about. It would give her a more powerful position in her marriage. She would no longer be the unexperienced girl.

But Rin had always known that these men that she barely knew would never get to see her in such a way.

At the moment, there was only one man in the world that she trusted.

“I am the most honoured, Mylord.”

Tōga smiled softly and brought her hand to his lips, kissing it gently before pulling Rin into his arms to carry her to his futon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *gasp*


	13. Finding Sympathy For a Prince

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did it! :) MissMarquin told me to get this chapter finished and so I did. If you haven't read her stuff yet, you should! She is a brilliant writer.

Rin lay awake and stared at the ceiling above, her hands clasped on top of the blanket. Tōga had left the room a while ago to get some water and had not returned since. Although she was tired, she could not find rest yet. What had happened seemed too surreal to her, to unbelievable – and yet, it was real.

And she had liked it.

Even now she could still feel Tōga’s hands on her body. He had undressed her carefully while kissing her tenderly, and his hands had found their way to the most sacred spots of her body, and within minutes she had been a writhing mess in his embrace, silently begging the kami to have mercy with her as he had claimed her, deflowering her in the gentlest way.

In that moment, she knew that she had reached the point of no return. A few seconds later, she had cried out his name in ecstasy.

But once it had been over, Rin had returned to her shy and meek self. Fortunately, Tōga had understood, and he had left the room to get some water for them – and to give Rin a moment of privacy.

Rin lifted the duvet and looked down at her thighs, and at the mess they had made. She felt a little sticky, but she assumed that this was normal after such activities. Now she knew why Izayoi had worried about Sesshōmaru having her, and Rin had to admit that she was right. Sesshōmaru would have never been that gentle with her, and even with Tōga it had hurt a little, but only at the beginning. But Rin did not regret her decision. In fact, she was proud of it. Whilst it did not change anything about her as a woman, it felt nice to have this little bit of personal experience.

After a while Tōga returned, carrying a tray with water and two cups. Rin sat up, holding the duvet up to her bare chest, thanking him as he poured her a drink. He was wearing a cotton yukata, the very same that she had seen on him after she had left the bathing house, and she had to admit that he looked very dashing in it. A soft blush had spread across his pale face, and although he was not as pale as Sesshōmaru, the colour made him look a bit more human – if one ignored the stripes or his ears.

“Are you feeling well?” Tōga asked eventually after he had taken a few sips. “I hope that I did not cause you any pain.”

Rin shook her head. “I’m fine, Mylord,” she said quietly, keeping her gaze lowered.

Tōga tilted his head to the side. “I would like it very much if you called me by my name,” he said. “I am ‘Mylord’ to almost everyone here, you know.”

Rin nodded, bowing her head a little. “Then I shall call you by your name, Tōga-sama.”

Before she knew what he was doing he had gently grasped her chin and lifted her gaze to look at her properly. For a moment, she worried that she had done something wrong. But Tōga did not seem angry. If anything, he seemed a little amused.

“And please do not use that honorific, Rin-chan,” he said softly. “After what we have shared it sounds strange to me. Would you not agree?”

Indeed, what they had shared was something so incredibly intimate that it had definitely brought them closer together. But to Rin, it was still a difficult concept to grasp. It went against everything she knew. For humans, it was unthinkable that a woman would sleep with her husband’s father. For yōkai, these rules did not seem to matter at all.

But then again, Sesshōmaru was not like a husband to her, and Tōga had never appeared like the typical father-in-law. In fact, she had always only seen him as the emperor, or as Izayoi’s other half.

Izayoi.

Oh, what would Izayoi have to say to this!

Tōga gently caressed Rin’s cheek. “You are lost in your thoughts, it seems,” he said. “What are you worrying about?”

Rin opened her mouth to reply, but no words came out. Had she become a mute again? Or was it just the shock that kept her from speaking?

“Do not worry about my wives,” Tōga said softly. “They could not care less. Especially Yonoko.”

“But… but Izayoi…”

“Izayoi would never think less of you just because you chose to share the bed with me, Rin-chan,” Tōga said calmly. “Here you are free to do as you please. Remember that.”

He let go of her cheek and settled on his half of the futon again, drinking the rest of the water in his cup. Rin looked down at her hands, closing her eyes then for a moment to calm herself. Right. Izayoi would not think badly of her, she knew that. But it still sounded wrong, so wrong. What if Izayoi started to believe that she was trying to steal Tōga from her?

Suddenly, she felt his arms around her, and a second later, she found herself lying on the futon again, with the emperor hovering over her, his fingers gently caressing her cheek.

“A woman as beautiful as you should never look worried,” Tōga said quietly. “Tell me what it is that troubles you so.”

Rin could not help but look at him in awe. It was undeniable that Sesshōmaru had gotten his good looks from his parents. Tōga was an incredibly handsome man. Only a fool would not recognise that. But he was also gentle, kind, and affectionate.

“I hope that you can forgive my son for being so… insolent,” Tōga said and pulled Rin against his chest, playing gently with her hair. “He did not have it easy as a child. And I am responsible for the way he is now. I know that.” He sighed deeply.

Rin frowned softly, looking up at him in confusion. How could a man like him be responsible for that? How could a man like Sesshōmaru turn out to be that arrogant and cold with a father like that?

“You have surely noticed that Yonoko is not exactly the motherly type,” Tōga said. “That is because among yōkai of our kind, it is some kind of… privilege to not be responsible for one’s own children. When Sesshōmaru was born, she kept him at her side until he was presented to the court, like Hikaru tonight, and then she gave him away to the concubines. He grew up in their care. One of them was called Shizue, and she was his wet nurse.” Tōga smiled fondly at the memory. “Sesshōmaru loved her very much, you see. He followed her everywhere. She was like a mother to him, and cared for him when Yonoko wouldn’t. He was ten years old when Shizue became ill and died. After that, he changed completely.” Tōga sighed deeply. “The other women tried to mother him, of course, but he would not let anyone near him. And I was… I was not there when it happened, you see. It was a time of war, and I was gone for many years. Sesshōmaru was fourteen when I returned. I barely recognised him.” Tōga lowered his head, nuzzling Rin’s hair. “When I married Izayoi and introduced her to Sesshōmaru, I told her that he could be a little difficult. You know her, so you can imagine how she treated him. With nothing but genuine kindness. She is… very different from Yonoko when it comes to children, you see. That is one of the reasons why I love her so much. She loves children deeply, not caring if they are her own or not.”

Rin shifted in his arms, moving away from him a little to look at him properly. “I do not judge the crown prince based on his past or his position, Tōga-san,” she said. “Merely by the way he speaks to me.”

“And you have every right to do so,” Tōga agreed. “I am not trying to find an excuse for his behaviour. I only hope that you understand that he is only struggling to find his place.”

“I don’t want to cause unrest within the family, Tōga-san,” she whispered. “I don’t-“

“You won’t,” Tōga replied softly, interrupting her. “My wives have their positions. Yonoko is my empress, and mother of my heir. Izayoi is my secondary wife, and mother of my two little sons. No one could ever take that from them. That is why I choose my women carefully. Once I have made a choice, I cannot change it anymore. And you…” He sighed, pushing a strand of hair out of her face. “You may be one of Sesshōmaru’s wives, but that does not change the fact that you are free. In both body and spirit.”

Before Rin could reply to that he had kissed her again, so tenderly and gently that it took her breath away. But his words calmed her, and helped her to believe that she was not doing something wrong, and that she would not be hated by the ones she held most dear. And besides, she was not his mistress. She was not a concubine. She was just a woman, a free woman, even, who had followed another man’s invitation willingly. And there was no shame in that.

Slowly, Tōga deepened the kiss, and Rin realised that he had not planned to send her back to her rooms once he had had her. Deep down, she was happy about it. It meant that Tōga had not just wanted to be with her for the one thing only, but that he indeed valued and cherished her as a human being. As a woman. Izayoi was truly lucky, Rin thought as she responded to the kiss and gave in to his advances a second time – but this time, she was not a virgin flower anymore.

She gasped as he pushed into her for the second time that night, his arm wrapped around her leg to keep her in the right position, but this time, there was no pain, only slight discomfort until he had found the right pace and position for them. Rin wrapped her arms around his neck, burying her face in his shoulder as he began to move, his hips crushing into hers as he moved faster than before. But Rin did not mind. It felt good, great, even, and soon, she had forgotten entirely what she had been worried about. And Tōga was a terrific lover, a man that knew how to please a woman. Rin was sure that he was holding back nonetheless, so that she would not leave his rooms bruised in the mornings. Not many men would have been that gentle, she thought. Especially not Sesshōmaru.

“AH!” Rin groaned and dug her nails into his shoulders as Tōga suddenly wrapped an arm around her waist, lifting her up to go even deeper. She held onto him tightly, as if he were the only thing to save her from drowning, and her legs instinctively wrapped around his hips.

Tōga chuckled into her ear. “Are you well?” He whispered. “Do you want me to-“

“Don’t… don’t stop,” Rin breathed before she even knew what she was saying.

And Tōga obeyed.

*******

The birds were singing outside the emperor’s room as Rin opened her eyes again, her limbs heavy from their nightly activities and from the warmth of the soft blanket. Tōga had put it around her, and he had kissed her once more before pulling her against his chest. But as Rin woke up the following morning, his half of the futon was empty, and she sat up immediately, clutching the blanket to her chest.

A second later, she could hear his voice coming from the dressing room.

Rin sighed in relief.

From what she could hear, Tōga was there with a servant, joking about this and that as he got dressed for the day. Rin did not have thought that he would get dressed with the help of a servant, too, like most women did. But then again, she remembered that Tōga often wore elaborate clothing around the palace that was surely difficult to put on.

Her own clothing lay somewhere behind these curtains. And she would definitely need a maid to put it on again.

Rin shifted a little on the futon, groaning as she felt the ache between her legs and in her lower body. Of course, this had to come with a certain cost, she thought as she touched her hips, just where Tōga had grabbed her a little too firmly last night. Slowly, she lifted the duvet and looked down at herself and at the mess they had made. A mixture of blood, seed, and other fluids was sticking to her thighs, and Rin realised that she would definitely have to bathe in order to feel clean again.

Just then, the door to the dressing room opened and Tōga returned to his bedchamber, pushing the curtain aside to reveal his futon and the woman on it. He was wearing a dark blue kimono with white flowers on the sleeves, and he had pulled his hair back again into a high ponytail, as usual. Any other man would have seemed strict like this, but not Tōga.

“Good morning,” he said with a smile. “I did not mean to wake you.”

“You didn’t, Mylord,” Rin said quickly. “I mean, Tōga-san.”

“A maid will bring you breakfast and some water so you can wash yourself,” Tōga said. “I would have breakfast with you, but I must attend a council meeting. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Of course not,” Rin said meekly and shook her head. The fact that he cared so much, and that he had even called for a maid to help her, was already enough to make her feel shy again. Fortunately, Tōga seemed to understand.

“I have enjoyed this night very much,” he said. “Perhaps we will see each other again under similar circumstances.”

Rin found that an odd way of saying “let’s do this again”, but she knew Tōga well enough by now to know that this was simply his way of expressing respect. And so, she nodded.

Tōga smiled again. “I shall see you later, then.”

And with that, he had turned around and headed to the door.

Rin sat up properly and rubbed her face with her hands as Tōga suddenly came in again.

“Ah, one more thing,” he said, resting his hand on the doorframe. Rin looked up. “The tea. You should drink it. Even if it is bitter.”

Rin frowned at that strange request, but before she could say anything, he had disappeared again. And so, she lay down again with a sigh, trying not to think of the sticky feeling between her legs while she waited for the maid.

Fortunately, the woman came to bring her breakfast and warm water barely five minutes later. With a cloth Rin removed all the traces of the night she had spent with Tōga from her body, and as she had put on a clean, light yukata, she felt much better already and her stomach began to grumble. The breakfast on the tray looked and smelled delicious, except for the steaming cup of tea that looked like cheap leaf water. The moment Rin took a sip she grimaced and shook her head in disgust. It was indeed very bitter, and the mere thought of drinking more of it made her shiver. Why on earth would Tōga want her to drink such a thing?

“It is not very nice, yes,” the maid said apologetically. “But it is the most reliable way to prevent unwanted outcomes.”

Rin stared at the maid for a moment before she looked at the cup again, finally realising what this was, and why Tōga wanted her to drink it. Of course. She should have known that there would be ways to make sure that there would not be any undesired pregnancies. Especially when it came to women that were not supposed to bear the emperor a child. Like her.

And son, Rin held her nose and drank the rest of the bitter mixture.


	14. What the Heart Wants

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't forget about this fic!  
> I'm currently doing an internship and that means I hardly get to write, but it will end in a week, fortunately!
> 
> Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter.  
> Lord Grumpyfluff returns!

Winter came to the West far earlier than the people had expected, and soon, the palace found itself covered in thick blankets of snow. Indeed, the time of garden parties and dances under the trees were over, but with the cold season, different activities for enjoyment would come. These days, the people gathered in the warm rooms for a cup of tea and sweet treats between meals, watching their children play in the snow. The Lady Izayoi was no exception. Almost every day she invited family and friends to her chambers for tea and good conversations, and in the evenings, she would join the emperor for one of the many feasts that were taking place. The day the midwife had allowed her to leave the bed again she had proudly attended the following feast, and Tōga had been beaming with joy as his secondary wife had taken her seat beside him again.

In the eyes of many, Tōga was the most fortunate. Not only was he a successful and respected ruler. He also had two beautiful wives, and three strong, healthy sons.

Little did the courtiers know that to all this, the emperor also had a new mistress.

Of course this was not the official title that Rin was carrying. To the court, she was still Lady Rin, secondary wife to the crown prince. But as Sesshōmaru was never around and paid no attention to the woman, she was free to do as she liked. If anything, Sesshōmaru was nothing more than her official protector, a guardian, perhaps. But even that duty he greatly neglected, and therefore, he had no claim to her. Everyone knew that. And Tōga knew that better than anyone else.

To Yonoko, he seemed rather lost in his thoughts as he sat against the wall in her bedroom, absentmindedly sipping the sake she had poured him earlier. But he had always been like this, she reminded herself. Thoughtful, calm, rational, and in control of himself. That was what had attracted her to him in the first place, and why she had agreed to marrying him. Their attraction to each other had always been mutual, and that had never changed. But sometimes, Yonoko wished that he spoke more openly about the things that bothered him, as eventually, she always had to get things out of him bit by bit.

“Your head is not only pretty, but also so very full of thoughts,” she hummed and rolled over on her futon to face him, the duvet wrapped around her hips only. “Tōga, my dear, it is no good if you keep your worries to yourself. I thought you shared everything that there is with our little Izayoi.”

Tōga looked up. “I did not mean to have you worry,” he said with an apologetic smile.

“So there is indeed something that troubles you,” Yonoko remarked, resting her chin in her palm. “Other ladies have husbands that come and bed them and then leave again. And what did I get? A god between the sheets and a philosopher the moment he leaves the futon.”

Tōga chuckled and rose from his tatami mat, making his way over to his empress. “You speak highly of me, indeed,” he said and took a seat beside her again, allowing Yonoko to rest her pretty head on his lap. They rarely spent time together like this, as one of them was always too busy for the other. But they were bound together, as they were mates, and although Yonoko knew that the one that owned Tōga’s heart was Izayoi, she was the only one equal to him in power and status.

“So, out with it,” Yonoko said as she closed her eyes to enjoy her mate’s fingers in her hair. “What makes you frown these days?”

Tōga sighed a little, shaking his head. “I was thinking about Sesshōmaru.”

“Ah. The child that I birthed,” Yonoko said dryly. “He is a disappointment to me these days, really.”

“I agree,” Tōga muttered, playfully wrapping Yonoko’s hair around his finger.

“How could he turn out like that, I wonder?” Yonoko said. “With a father like you, and a mother like me, and the best teachers that there are….” She sighed dramatically. “He hardly visits me. His poor mother. And he is disrespectful towards you, his most honourable father. We certainly did not raise him to be like that.”

“The truth is that we did not raise him at all, Yonoko,” Tōga reminded her calmly. “It was Shizue who raised him. He hardly saw either of us.”

“As if that were our fault,” Yonoko replied, opening her eyes to look at her mate. “We were at war. You had the West to defend. And Sesshōmaru was in the very best hands at all times, that I made sure of personally.”

“I know,” Tōga said calmly, brushing over her cheek with his finger. “But I left him at a critical age. He would have needed my guidance. And now look what has become of him.” He let out a frustrated sigh. “He is stubborn and arrogant. Obnoxious. His wives mean nothing to him.”

“Nothing can be a hopeless romantic like you, dearest.”

“That I do not mean,” Tōga huffed. “Kagura deserves to become a mother, and to have her position secured. And Rin…”

Yonoko smiled to herself. Ah. They had reached the actual reason for his worries.

“She is not in the right hands,” Yonoko said. “That is what you have been thinking about, is that not correct?”

Tōga looked away from her.

“I know that you have been sharing the bed with her for almost three months now,” Yonoko said and sat up a little, grasping Tōga’s chin. “I hope she is good.”

“That is a tasteless remark.”

“But a genuine one,” Yonoko said. “She has made a fine choice for herself by sharing the bed with you. I must know, as I have been your empress for centuries. I know what you are like. Tender and passionate…” She gently caressed his thigh. “Why don’t you make her your mistress?”

Tōga looked at her with a deep frown. “She is Sesshōmaru’s wife,” he said. “There are-“

“Now do not use morality as an argument,” Yonoko laughed. “And besides, she is not his wife. She only would be if he ever slept with her, which he does not do because he despises her for being human. She is nothing more than his ward, if anything. She has no obligation to him – that she told me herself when I asked her to show our son compassion. And I cannot blame her for refusing to be with a man like him.” She sat up properly, reaching out to touch his cheek. “But she likes you. And you like her, it seems. One woman more is surely no problem for you?”

“That is not what this is about,” Tōga said and shook his head, pulling Yonoko’s hand away from his face, but kept it in his own. “I mean… what message would that send to the people, and to Rin herself, if I made her my mistress? That she is a chess figure that can be moved across the board as I please? She is not a toy, Yonoko. I gave her to Sesshōmaru. It should stay that way.”

“Yes, you gave her to Sesshōmaru, but did she know what she was getting herself into?” Yonoko asked. “You say that she is not a toy, and yet, you give her no option to decide what she wants for herself.” She moved to sit on his lap, wrapping her arms around Tōga’s neck, their noses almost touching. “Ask her what she wants. That is my suggestion. Toys cannot choose, Tōga-chan. But people can.”

Tōga muttered something under his breath, but Yonoko shut him up with a kiss before she buried her face in his neck. She knew him. She knew that he would think about her words, and that he would eventually come to the right solution. Rin was a lovely girl, and she certainly would not mind having another woman near him for the days when Izayoi was unable to give him the attention that he wanted. And of that there would be many in the future, that she was sure of. Izayoi would bear him more children, and Yonoko did not want to be the one responsible for keeping Tōga relaxed and entertained.

“I have seen Hikaru yesterday, by the way,” Yonoko said after a while. “Lovely little thing. A bit like Sesshōmaru when he was that age. He was a cute child.” She sighed wistfully at the memory.

Tōga raised an eyebrow, pulling back a little. “Is that the desire to have another child that I hear in your voice?”

Yonoko laughed. “Most certainly not!” She said and shook her head. “I gave birth to Sesshōmaru in greatest agony, and I looked like a cow for months! No, I leave bearing children to little Izayoi. She makes pretty ones, too.”

Tōga smirked. “That is true,” he said and Yonoko got off his lap, lying down on the futon with her back to him as she looked at her husband over her shoulder.

“Nonetheless, I am most willing to mate,” she smiled, showing off her fangs.

And Tōga obeyed.

*******

The fact that Sesshōmaru had not shown his face at the palace for almost five months now upset no one less than Rin. She hardly thought of him anyway, and in her daily life, he played no role at all. She was happy with what she had, with Izayoi to call her sister and Inuyasha and Hikaru to call her nephews. Yes, after years of slavery, she had freedom, and she had a family, and she was grateful for everything that Tōga had given her.

Whenever she did not spend her time with Izayoi and the children, Rin spent her days in the library, getting lost between the many pages of the books. The shelf with poetry had quickly become her favourite, and she could not get enough of the way the poets described the world around them, their feelings and impressions. Some of them she had shown to Izayoi, who was a very educated woman, and Izayoi had approved of her reading material. Poetry was healing for the soul, she had said, and Rin believed her. Of course she would never forget about the past, and about the life she had had in Aomori, but she had decided that, perhaps, writing about it would free her mind from it for good.

The fact that she had begun to write did not remain a secret for long. Tōga had found one of her first drafts in the library, and had made sure that Rin received a tutor to teach her calligraphy. At first, the memories of a former slave seemed unsuitable for poetry to her tutor, but Rin showed a great talent for wording and expressions. And so, it did not take long until her first poem was finished, and given to the Emperor to read.

The following evening, the entire court listened to a recital of the poetry of the Lady Rin and found themselves deeply moved.

From that day on, Tōga asked to be the first one to hear Rin’s new poems whenever she wrote them. At first, Rin had felt immensely uncomfortable by showing him what she thought to be the deepest secrets of her soul. But soon, she found that poetry was the right way to express what she felt, and how grateful she was for her new life. Tōga understood her metaphors and similes easily, and after a particularly intimate poem, she fled into his arms, only to be kissed by him reassuringly.

Tōga was not the first man that had treated her with kindness. Her first owner had been a good man, too. But after he had sold her, she had only experienced coldness and cruelty. She had been sure that in the West, it would not be any different. She had not known that slavery did not exist there, but it seemed as if the gods had sent her to the right place. To the right man.

It was not love that she felt for him – so she told herself. It was affection, deep affection, even. But above all, it was mainly sheer gratitude. He treated her well and respected her.

He was her friend.

Therefore, she was more than surprised as he suggested the unthinkable one evening, after he had enjoyed her in the most scandalous way she had ever imagined.

The emperor was surely jesting, Rin thought as she stared at him with wide eyes while he waited for her opinion on the matter. No, he was surely only joking. There was no way he would ask her that, her, of all people. After all, she was bound to someone else, to his son, even. And yet, he had asked her for more than what they already shared.

“I want you to decide for yourself,” Tōga said calmly. “You do not have to give me your answer now, of course. Take all the time that you need. There will be no consequences for you, no matter how you decide. Remember that you are a free woman with a free will and that this enables you to shape your life the way you want it.”

Rin held the duvet close to her chest, looking down at her lap as she tried to remain calm. This was not just any offer, that much she knew, despite knowing still so little about the customs of court. A mistress was the official lover of the sovereign, bound to him only. Not a concubine, not a wife.

It was a very peculiar position.

Tōga rose from the futon and reached for his clothing. “Decide it for yourself,” he said as he turned around again. “Speak with Izayoi if you like.”

Rin nodded lightly. That she would definitely do. An offer like this did not come every day, after all, and she wanted to know more.

“Will you join me for the feast tonight?” Tōga asked, changing the subject. “A famous musician is with us these days.”

“I’m not sure yet,” Rin replied and looked up at him again. “I… I haven’t felt too well today.”

“No?” Tōga seemed surprised. “Then why did you not say so when I came here, Rin-chan?”

“It’s probably just a cold,” Rin assured him. “I played with Inuyasha in the snow for a little too long, I believe. I only need some more sleep.”

“If you say so.” Tōga kissed her hand gently. “Ah, I should mention this before I forget it again. Sesshōmaru has been seen near the borders. I assume he will return to the palace sooner or later, and then I will have him apologise to you.”

Rin blushed. “That really is not necessary,” she said.

“I insist,” Tōga said and let go of her hand again, putting on his haori as he made his way to the door. In the doorframe, he turned around once more, inclining his head to her. “Think about my offer, yes?”

Rin nodded. “I will, your majesty.”

Tōga smirked and walked away, down the hallway towards the gates of the women’s shiro.

Rin rolled onto her back, sighing deeply.

It seemed as if her life kept changing over and over again.

*******

Kenshin was the first to see Sesshōmaru again.

It was already past midnight, and most courtiers had gone to bed already as Kenshin made his way across the courtyard with bouncy steps, being in an excellent mood after spending time in the company of his current girlfriend. What he did not expect on his way back to his own rooms, however, was his best friend’s silhouette near the well, sitting on a rock with a piece of parchment in his hand, reading in the light of the moon.

Kenshin frowned and approached Sesshōmaru slowly, knowing that he knew that he was there, but for some reason, Sesshōmaru chose not to pay attention to him. Instead, he seemed very focused on whatever it was that he was reading, and so, Kenshin was curious to know what kept Sesshōmaru so intrigued.

He came to stand behind him, peeking over his shoulder.

“Is that poetry?” Kenshin asked. “Since when do you read poetry?”

Sesshōmaru huffed. “I found it on the floor, right here,” he said, glancing at the title. “The Lament of the Caged,” he murmured. “A brutal piece of poetry. New to me, too.”

Kenshin chuckled.

“What are you laughing about?” Sesshōmaru asked and finally turned his head to look at Kenshin. “My father is the poetry expert in this realm, not me. This Sesshōmaru has no time for these things.” He stood, dropping the piece of paper again.

“Are you not even curious about it?” Kenshin asked. “Not even about the author?”

“Why should I be curious?”

“Because the answer would surprise you,” Kenshin said with a grin, leaning against the well.

Sesshōmaru huffed. “Stop speaking in riddles, Kenshin.”

“I mean it,” Kenshin said in amusement. “Because, believe it or not, it is YOUR wife that wrote these truly poetic lines. And I don’t mean the one with the sour face and the scary eyes.”

Sesshōmaru stared at Kenshin for a long moment before he picked up the parchment again, his eyes wandering over the letters.

“This is a copy, of course,” Kenshin remarked. “But yeah. Lady Rin writes poetry. Good poetry. Excellent poetry. Everyone is reciting it.”

Now the title even made sense, Sesshōmaru thought as he read the poem again, suddenly understanding its depth and meaning completely. It was brutal because it was full of truth, of an inconvenient truth that people liked to forget about because it did not affect them.

“Did she write just this one, then?”

Kenshin raised an eyebrow, surprised that Sesshōmaru seemed to react to it. “She wrote more of them,” he said. “But most of them she keeps to herself, they say- hey, where are you going?” Sesshōmaru had begun to walk away towards the gates. “Sesshōmaru, it’s past midnight!”

“I have to speak to my father,” he said, crumpling the paper in his fist. “There are things that have to end. _Now_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me in the comments: Should Rin say yes? Or should Touga make her his third wife, even?
> 
> Tell me your opinion in the comments! :-)


	15. Hindsight

Touga had not expected his son to return in the middle of the night. More than that, he had not expected him to request an immediate audience with his father. Knowing his son, Touga had agreed, and had left Izayoi’s side immediately. She had not stopped him. Izayoi knew that Sesshomaru would have never asked for his father if he had not had a good reason for that, and she had let Touga go with a kiss on the cheek.

The Emperor sat on the dais, listening attentively as Sesshomaru delivered the latest report from the North, including news that were indeed a reason for careful discussion and required his immediate attention. He had not thought that Sesshomaru, who had left the palace as a result of his stubborn behaviour, would return to him with news about the political situation. But it did not surprise him. Touga knew that Sesshomaru would always be loyal to the throne, regardless of the way he acted.

Eventually, Sesshomaru had finished his report, and he came to sit in front of his father, his pale hands resting on his knees. “This situation is most distressing for the people along the border, Chichiue,” he said calmly. “Slave traders must not be allowed to pass through the West. The people are fearing for their lives and for their children.”

“Indeed,” Touga said with a small nod and shifted on his cushion. “We have abolished slavery. We cannot allow foreign slave traders to travel through our realm. Not in times like these.”

Sesshomaru knew what he meant. “The Western throne needs the support of the people for the hardship that will sooner or later come,” he said. “The Takeda clan won’t sit still for much longer. Eventually, they will rise against us in a rebellion. We will need the people on our side.”

“You are correct,” Touga said and reached for the tea in front of him, taking a small sip. They could not afford letting their people down in times like these, and no man would be willing to fight for them if they could not even protect them in peaceful times. “You have proven to have an excellent eye for these things, my son. Even for the human population. That pleases me very much.”

Sesshomaru shook his head lightly. “I only do what is best for the West, Chichiue,” he said. “And slave trade has led to outbursts of violence in the North. We must not allow ourselves to make the same mistakes.”

Touga watched his son carefully as he poured him a cup of tea, which Sesshomaru accepted a moment later. “You have been to Aomori, then?”

Sesshomaru nodded. “I have.”

“And you have witnessed things that you did not like.”

Sesshomaru, who had just taken a small sip of the brew, glanced up at his father, his golden eyes somber and full of disgust. “Even I know that it is cruel to separate siblings,” he said. “Or children from their parents.” He hid behind his cup again, and Touga could not help but wonder if Sesshomaru meant to imply his views about his own childhood.

But that was a discussion they would have on another day.

“A people that relies on slaves will not hesitate to fight for its right to keep this cruel institution,” Touga said eventually. “But we will close the roads for slave traders. Also in the name of Lady Rin.” He reached for his own cup once more. “She has been writing poetry about her experiences.”

“I know,” Sesshomaru replied. “I read it.”

“And what do you think of it?”

“It is brutal.”

“Brutal?”

“Yes. But it is necessary. For it draws attention to the unhealthy state of things.”

Touga smiled into his cup. Such an answer could only come from his son, and it did not surprise him at all. After all, Sesshomaru knew a lot about poetry. In fact, he had proven to be a very gifted author himself, and his teachers had soon realised that there was very little that they could still teach him about the art of words. But somewhere on the way, Sesshomaru had abandoned this gift that the kami had given him. He did not write anymore. And that was a fact that saddened Touga deeply.

“I have realised that I have underestimated Lady Rin’s abilities,” Sesshomaru said eventually and put his cup down. “Therefore, I will visit her and apologise to her, as it is my duty as her husband.”

Touga narrowed his eyes a little. That was true. Sesshomaru was still Rin’s husband, even if it was just on the paper, but it seemed that Sesshomaru seemed to finally warm up to the idea of having two wives, and a human one, even, to care for. As a father, he had to be happy for him.

But as Rin had not given him her answer yet regarding his offer to make her his mistress, he was not sure what to think.

“I am glad that you have come to your senses, Sesshomaru,” Touga said and rose from the dais. “Your mother will be pleased, too. She has taken a liking to Rin, you see.”

Sesshomaru rose as well, following his father to the gates where their ways would part again.

“I have heard that another son has been born to you,” he said. “Allow me to congratulate you, Chichiue.”

“Thank you,” Touga said, clasping his hands behind his back. “His name is Hikaru. I’m sure the Lady Izayoi would be pleased if you went to visit her and the boy some time.”

“I will do so, Chichiue,” Sesshomaru said and inclined his head to him. “Good night.”

He walked away towards his own chambers, but Touga called him back once more. As Sesshomaru turned around, his father was watching him attentively, as if he were expecting something specific to happen.

“How is Chieko?” Touga asked.

Sesshomaru frowned a little. “She is well, Chichiue. She is still in Aomori.”

Touga nodded once. “Make sure that she stays there.”

Sesshomaru bowed lightly to him, and as he raised his head again, his father was gone.

It was not that Touga disapproved of Chieko personally. In fact, they had met already, and Touga had to admit that he could see why his son had taken a liking to that woman. But Sesshomaru had a principal wife to look after, and a secondary wife to care for. A woman like Chieko would have only caused unrest within the imperial household.

Sesshomaru had no intention to make Chieko – or any woman in general – his mistress. What they shared did not go beyond the physical part, and women had never interested him much. There had been only one woman in his life that he had always respected, that he had been looking up to. That he had learnt from.

But Shizue was dead, gone and buried.

And with her, his heart had died, too.

* * *

 

Rin would have never thought that she would have a maid of her own one day. That had always been her job as a slave. Countless times, she had knelt beside the dressing table of her owner’s wife, holding her hairbrushes or bowls with water for her to use. Now it was the other way round. Now, she was the one to sit at the dressing table, with a maid of her own sitting beside her to help her get ready for bed. But the maid was not a slave – quite the contrary. Chihiro was a lovely young woman, roughly the same age as Rin, and she was the daughter of a nobleman that Tōga trusted very much. At first, Rin had been worried that her maid would look down upon her because of her origins, but it turned out that there was truly no reason for Rin to worry. Chihiro had greeted her humbly the day they had first met, and since then, the two young women had been friends. In Chihiro’s company, Rin could relax, and she could tell her everything. In return, Rin could learn a lot from Chihiro about courtly life and the latest gossip.

“And Daisuke-san ran right into the room, you say?” Rin giggled and looked at Chihiro through the mirror as she washed her hands in a bowl.

“Yes, he did!” Chihiro laughed, reaching for a towel for her mistress. “And Fumi-chan could barely cover herself! Oh, they could hear them scream and shout throughout the outer chambers!”

Rin chuckled and shook her head, taking the towel from Chihiro. “Ah, it always feels good to wash one’s face and hands after a long day.”

“Indeed, Mylady,” Chihiro agreed. “But why don’t you try some of the cream that Lady Izayoi sent to you? It will make your skin so very soft.”

Rin looked down at the small, silver tin on her dressing table that Izayoi had given to her a while ago. It was true that she usually only ever washed her hands and face, and then combed her hair. But that was only what she had gotten used to over the course of the years. Now she had water to wash herself whenever she wanted. And yet, she remained as careful with it as she had always been. But now, she reached for the silver tin and opened it, breathing in the floral scent of the cream.

“Perhaps you are right,” she said to Chihiro. “It certainly would not hurt to try it, no?”

Carefully, she put some of the cream on her finger, rubbing it into her palm in small circles before spreading it all over her hand and face. Never before had she been able to use such a luxurious product, and she inhaled deeply as the floral scent enchanted her senses.

“There is another one, too,” Chihiro said, happy that her mistress seemed to like it. She reached for a larger tin. “This one is from the healer. Everyone here uses it! It is meant for the entire body, and it is said to keep a woman’s breasts soft and firm at the same time and to ease the tensions of scars. Would you like to try it?”

Rin nodded, putting the silver tin down as she shrugged of her light yukata and came to sit in front of her mirror with her upper body completely bare, only her long hair covering her breasts. Rin pushed it aside, studying her reflection in the mirror. She rarely did so, as she found nothing extraordinary about herself. But the emperor took great pleasure in it, and she often found herself in his embrace, his hand between her legs whilst he kissed and caressed her bosom. According to Izayoi, a woman’s body was a sensual garden that men never grew tired of exploring. And yet, Rin wondered why Tōga was so very fascinated with her chest.

She took some of the cream, carefully applying it to her skin and moving her fingers in circles to rub it in. It felt nice and cool on her skin, leaving it behind soft and moisturised.

“Chihiro,” Rin said eventually as she stood, holding her yukata around her waist to cover herself at least a little as the maid applied the cream to her scarred back. “What do men like about women?”

“Oh, many things, Mylady!” Chihiro replied cheerfully. “A pretty face is one thing, of course. But a woman must also be gentle and kind and affectionate in order to win a man’s heart. She must like the things she likes, and those that she does not like she must at least tolerate. It is the same the other way round, you know.”

Rin smiled lightly. “Yes. I know that. But… what do they like physically?”

“Oh, that is a difficult question, Mylady,” Chihiro answered. “You see, it entirely depends on what the man is. A dog yōkai like his majesty, a dragon yōkai, a water yōkai, or a simple human. It all depends on what kind of man you are looking at, for they all have different tastes. Dragon yōkai like women with bright red lips and with their hair blowing in the wind wildly, for example.”

Rin nodded, holding still as Chihiro applied more cream to her scars. Most of the time, she did not think of them. When she had undressed for Tōga for the first time, she had been worried about them, but he had only kissed them and caressed them with his fingertips.

“And what about dog yōkai?” Rin asked. “I mean, you are one. You must surely know.”

Chihiro giggled excitedly. “Oh, yes, of course I know that. You see, what dog yōkai find most enchanting is a woman’s figure. They like voluptuous women, like the Lady Izayoi, for they like to cuddle their women and hold them close at night. A full chest, a stomach like a little cushion, a well-rounded bottom, and soft thighs are regarded as irresistible for male dog yōkai, and they are seen as clear indicators of fertility.”

Rin nodded lightly, looking at herself in the mirror once more. Of course she would never be able to compete with Izayoi, who was perfect in every way. It was not that Rin wanted to compete with her – but knowing all this made her wonder what the emperor liked about her.

“I’m nothing like that,” Rin said, but Chihiro shook her head.

“Don’t say that, Mylady!” She said with a frown. “You are on the very best way! You must remember that you went hungry many times in your life! But see how much you have changed already! You have such a nice figure. And, truth be told, most women develop a full chest only after they have had a baby.”

Rin nodded, pushing her hair out of the way so that Chihiro could put cream on the rest of her back as well. “I know so very little of the customs here,” she said. “Or about dog yōkai in general. I only know his majesty and the Lady Mother. And you, of course.”

“Oh, it is rather similar to humans, I think,” Chihiro replied. “We grow up, we marry, we have children, we find them partners, and one day, we die. Not much different.”

Rin chuckled. “Not really, no,” she agreed. “How is it with marriage and children, Chihiro-chan? When did you get married?”

“My father promised me to Kazuhiro-sama when I was five years old,” her maid explained. “And I became his wife once my mother deemed that I was ready. I was… let me think…” She paused in her movements. “I was seventeen years old in mind and body. In human years, I was eighty.”

That was another thing that Rin found odd to get used to. Chihiro looked not much older than she did, but she had already lived for almost one hundred years.

“And then?”

“Then I lived comfortably in his manor, together with his principal wife. He would often be away at court, and I only ever saw him when we were invited to banquets. Now that I am here I see him more often, of course. Mostly at night, obviously,” she added with a telling smile.

Rin began to laugh. Oh, how she loved Chihiro’s sense of humour.

“And is your husband like other dog yōkai?” She asked.

“Well, let’s put it like this,” Chihiro said and stepped aside, looking at Rin with the most serious expression on her face. “He can’t get enough of my butt.”

At that, the women burst into shrieking laughter and held onto each other, barely able to calm down again as suddenly, Rin felt a gentle breeze on her bare back, and the sudden knowledge that someone had opened the door came over her. And then, Chihiro suddenly dropped to her knees, bowing to the person that had entered the room, and as Rin turned around, she found the person she expected the least standing in the doorframe.

“Mylord!” She breathed, quickly covering herself as she bowed lightly to Sesshōmaru, who remained frozen at the entrance to her bedchamber and quickly averted his gaze as he realised that he had just walked in to a half-naked woman.

“I will return later,” he said and turned around to leave, but Rin had already adjusted her yukata.

“It is fine, Mylord,” she said. She was not afraid of him, as she had no reason for that. He had seen some of her skin, but what did it matter?

Was he not, at least officially, her husband?

“How can I help you?” She asked.

To her surprise, Sesshōmaru had stopped in the doorframe, and as he turned around to her again, his golden eyes were, for once, not as cold as she remembered them. They were still rather emotionless, but the disgust in them was gone.

“I came to apologise for my rude behaviour at the banquet,” he said, clasping his hands behind his back. “And to congratulate you on your fine piece of poetry.”

Rin blinked in surprise. She had been sure that he came to apologise, simply because Tōga had said he would force him to. But she had certainly not expected him to comment on her writing, let alone to be aware of it.

“Thank you,” she said. “I wrote what I thought.”

“That is obvious,” Sesshōmaru said, inclining his head to her. “I would like to speak to you about it at some point.”

Rin was even more confused. “Fine,” she said nonetheless. “Tomorrow, perhaps?”

The prince nodded. “Tomorrow it is, then.”

They bowed to each other once more, and then he left, leaving behind a rather confused Rin and Chihiro.

On the way back to his rooms, Sesshōmaru closed his eyes. He had seen the scars on Rin’s back only for a second, but they had been there. The remains of the lashings she had received as a slave.

For the first time, Sesshōmaru pitied her.


	16. Tea with a Friend

The Crown prince joined his secondary wife for tea in the early afternoon hours.

He had been in these rooms before. A few decades ago, they had been Kagura’s, but she had complained about the lack of sunshine and the loud chirping of the birds in the tree right outside the bedroom. Therefore, she had moved to the rooms she now lived in. Sesshōmaru had never understood why she had not liked this place. To him, it seemed perfectly fine for a woman of her social standing. In fact, these rooms were larger than what several families of farmers had altogether. And Lady Rin seemed to be well aware of that. As he came to meet with her, she was busy tidying her dressing table, and she quickly swept the surface of the table with her hand, not caring about getting dirty herself.

Some habits one could never really get rid of, he thought.

The tea that the maid served them was different from the one that Kagura always drank. It had a heavy floral scent, yet it tasted very light and refreshing. Rin, who had noticed his confusion, explained that it was a special blend that a local tea merchant had sent to the palace, and that she was trying them all.

“Now that I have the opportunity to enjoy such fine things, I should not waste any of it,” she said as she took another small sip from her cup, letting out a delighted hum. “I think this one shall be one of my new favourites.”

For Sesshōmaru, the tea was a little too sweet, but he would not be impolite and ask for a different one. “You enjoy tea, then, Lady Rin?” He asked.

“Now I do, yes,” Rin replied. “I enjoyed the first cup of tea when Lady Izayoi invited me for breakfast on my first day here.”

Sesshōmaru raised an eyebrow. “So you have never had tea before that?” He asked.

Rin shook her head. “No, Mylord. In the north, slaves are only given water. Sometimes, they are given cider. Tea is only meant for the free people.”

Sesshōmaru nodded lightly, taking another sip from the brew. He had not expected to reach this subject so very early in their conversation, but at least, it seemed as if she were able to speak freely about it, and without shame.

“So now I enjoy all the things that were once forbidden to me,” Rin said with a small smile and clasped her hands on her lap. “I am very grateful for everything his majesty and the gods have given to me. The gods that you worship here are different from the ones that slaves pray to in the North, but the gods here must have taken a liking to me for a reason that I have yet to understand. I thank them day and night for giving me this life. Even if it sometimes feels surreal, and despite the fact I feel… useless, sometimes, you see. I’m not doing anything.”

Sesshōmaru nodded. “From one cage into the other, you say?”

“Oh, I would not put it that way, Mylord,” Rin assured him. “I do not feel trapped or caged. But before I came here, I had some sort of purpose. Even if it was just to hold my mistress’s hairbrush. Now I have no duty to follow. It feels strange, after… being a slave.”

For the first time, Sesshōmaru believed to see a certain sadness in her eyes. No, she surely did not miss her days as a slave – but she missed having a purpose, that much he could tell. It was only natural. He too knew the feeling. He relied on his father to give him tasks to follow, to tell him where to go to do his duty to him and his people. He hated being unoccupied and bored, being chained to the palace like a common dog.

“Is that why you have started to write poetry?” Sesshōmaru asked. “To have a purpose?”

Rin chuckled. “This is hardly a purpose, Mylord,” she said. “I did it in order to express what I was thinking.”

“But it brings you joy.”

At that, Rin looked at him in mild surprise, as if she had not expected such an utterance coming from him at all. And indeed, she had not expected him to have tea and a conversation with her – let alone to come to her in the first place. But now, it suddenly seemed as if he were interested in getting to know her better, for a reason that Rin did not yet quite understand.

She lowered her gaze and pushed a strand of hair out of her face. She looked more and more like a noble lady, Sesshōmaru thought, and let his eyes wander over her general appearance. The kimono she wore was of a beautiful dark blue, with white and yellow embroidery. Her long, dark hair was shiny, framing her pretty face perfectly. But like Lady Izayoi, she wore no make-up, as she had a naturally fair complexion that needed nothing more but the tender adornment of a feminine blush.

All of these things Sesshōmaru did notice, and he cursed himself for doing so.

“I do enjoy many things, Mylord,” Rin said eventually. “But yes. Writing poetry brings me joy. And it is an exercise for the mind. As his majesty once told me, it is of great importance to keep one’s mind occupied, to offer oneself mental challenges. Poetry might seem so very tender, but it is a hard task to make the words flow the way one feels the pictures run through one’s veins.”

“And yet, you do it so easily as you speak,” Sesshōmaru replied. “You found your voice just recently, Lady Rin. It was wrong of me to assume that you were simple-minded based on your muteness.”

“It was a logical conclusion, nothing more,” Rin said calmly, much to Sesshōmaru’s surprise. He had expected her to ignore his apology, or to briefly accept it, but she surprised him once more by taking the opportunity to speak about it in greater detail. “T’is often said that the simple-minded either speak too much, too little, or not at all.”

“Most of the time, they tend to speak far too much,” Sesshōmaru murmured, reaching for the tea once more to take a sip. The more he drank of the tea, the more it seemed to be to his liking. “And they tend to be my wife’s ladies-in-waiting.”

Rin chuckled at that. She knew Kagura’s friends, and how simple and naïve they could be. The daughters of noble lords, that was what they were, women raised to serve, not to think. It was a pity.

“It is a pity, though,” Sesshōmaru said, as if he had been reading her mind. “So much potential gone to waste with these ladies.”

Rin frowned softly. “So you do think highly of women, after all?”

Sesshōmaru huffed. “I always have, Lady Rin, that I can assure you.”

“But not of human women.”

Her expression changed instantly as she said that, and the slight confusion returned. Sesshōmaru bowed his head. He had known that a simple, brief apology would most certainly not do, and he could not blame the gods for putting him through this.

But before he could open his mouth again, Rin spoke, and what she said sent cold shivers down his spine.

“For some reason, you have chosen to come to me to apologise. I do not wish to hear your explanations unless they come from the bottom of your heart. That I can only see as such once I have gotten to know you better. And then, if that point is reached, an apology might have become obsolete anyway.” Rin’s eyes seemed to sparkle as she spoke, but within the blink of an eye, it was gone again. “I believe it to be most unhealthy to linger in the past, Mylord,” she added, in a much softer tone this time. “And therefore, if you wish so, we should leave this most unfortunate evening behind and regard each other as friends from now on.”

Never before had a woman spoken to him with such ease and precision at the same time, let alone a human woman, and so, Sesshōmaru found himself at loss for words. She almost seemed cheerful, now that she was looking at him, and a gentle, genuine smile had appeared on her face, and her gaze was full of warmth. Was she indeed so determined to leave the past behind and to continue as if nothing had happened at all?

“Do not get me wrong, Mylord,” she said then. “I do not intend to simply forget your words of that evening. To say that would mean to tell a lie, and I have never once told a lie in my life. As a slave, a lie can mean death, and whilst I may not be sentenced to death for lying in my current position, I believe it to be most poisonous to any relationship, regardless of its nature.” She tilted her head to the side. “But I intend to forgive, Sesshōmaru-sama.”

Just then, the door to their left was opened and a young maid came in with a plate of small cakes, fresh from the kitchens. Sesshōmaru watched as she placed them on the table between him and Rin, and it did not surprise him that Rin raised her head to thank the girl personally. She was kind to everyone, regardless of their standing.

And therefore, she was kind to him.

He did not need kindness, though. Especially not the kindness of someone like her. But he accepted it.

“So it shall be, then,” Sesshōmaru said and inclined his head to her. “Friends in marriage we shall be.”

And with that, they both reached for the teapot to pour the other one a new cup. Rin withdrew her hand before it could touch his, allowing him to perform this gesture of acknowledgement first. The floral scent of the tea filled the room once more, and as Rin took a sip from the brew, she could not help but watch the man sitting in front of her with different eyes.

Tōga had told her that deep down, there was kindness in the Crown Prince.

Perhaps he was right.

“I have not been a good husband to you, Lady Rin,” Sesshōmaru said after a while. That surprised Rin, and she looked at him attentively, wondering why he had chosen to change the subject from poetry to this. After all, had he not said that he wished to speak to her mainly about her writings? “I am aware that there are duties that I should have performed but did not. And I did not treat you with the care and gentleness that a maiden-“

“I am no maiden anymore, Mylord,” Rin interrupted him calmly. Sesshōmaru frowned lightly.

Rin knew that she did not have to justify her actions, neither to him nor to anyone else, and that everything she had done or would do was none of Sesshōmaru’s business. He did not own her. In this realm, it was a husband’s duty to protect the woman given to him. Everything beyond that duty was to be decided by his wife.

“I have given myself to his majesty,” she told him frankly. “And I have met with him several times.”

It should have surprised him, but the truth was that Sesshōmaru was not. What did surprise him, however, was the fact that he was not relieved to be freed of the duty to deflower her. A few months ago, he would have given her away gladly.

But now, the knowledge that another man, his father, even, had been deemed more trustworthy by her, seemed to cut right through his heart.

Sesshōmaru reached for his cup once more. “I see,” he murmured, taking a sip. “I do hope that you have no regrets.”

“I do not, Mylord,” Rin assured him. “But I hope that you do not think any less of me.”

Sesshōmaru stared at her. “Why should I do that?” He asked. “It is perfectly common for a woman of your-“

“I know, I know,” Rin said with a sigh and looked away from him, towards the garden. “And yet, it is a custom that goes against everything that I know. It is unheard of in the north for a woman to decide these things so freely, regardless of her marital status.” She looked back at him again, and for a moment, Sesshōmaru believed to see sadness in her eyes. “I have still a lot to learn, Mylord. But now that I can call you a friend, I’m sure I will learn it all with more ease.”

That day, Sesshōmaru returned to his chambers in a mood that his servants had never seen on him before. His valet, a man that had been serving him since the day Sesshōmaru had reached adulthood, could not help but wonder if his master had received bad news, or if he had had an encounter with a god that had made him so demure. Little did these people know that Sesshōmaru’s sudden change in nature had been caused by a single person, someone they would expect the least. And yet, his valet was reminded of the Lady Rin as he wished his master a good night, and received a small thankyou in return.

Sesshōmaru could not help but think of the women he had seen in Aomori. Had Rin been one of them, some time ago? Had she been bought at a market like this in order to be sent here as a gift?

At least she was now safe here. She was free, in both mind and body, and able to make decisions for herself. What she decided was none of his business. However, he could not deny that it bothered him that he even reflected on them. These things he had always deemed unworthy of his attention – a man, a prince even, should not concern himself with the matters of women. And yet, he could not stop thinking of her, and of the things she had said.

The gods had given him a rare woman. And, as if just to mess with him, she happened to be one that could not be tamed.

But there was no reason to try – for Rin had defeated him with her words only and struck respect into his heart, whose shell of ice had slowly begun to melt.

*******

From that day onwards, Sesshōmaru treated both of his wives with the respect they deserved.

Especially Kagura was delighted to find herself in the centre of his attention after such a long time. Not only did he now visit her regularly in her bedchamber, but he also treated her accordingly in public. He had never disrespected her openly before, but now, it seemed as if he were trying to make up for the lack of attention in their marriage. Kagura accepted all of this happily, and for the first time in months, she seemed genuinely happy.

Both Tōga and Yonoko knew, however, that Sesshōmaru’s motivation to do so did not come from the depths of his heart. If anything, Sesshōmaru had realised what was at stake, and that one day, he would find himself in his father’s position and rule over the West. And if he did not get his private life in order, then he would not be able to rule with the same power and strength his father always had.

None of this had to do with Kagura personally.

What did surprise them, however, was the fact that Sesshōmaru was often to be found in the reception room of his secondary wife whenever he had an afternoon to himself. But according to the maids that served Rin and that were interrogated afterwards by the Empress herself, nothing ever happened between them that could be interpreted as an intimate gesture. All they seemed to do was drinking tea and discussing poetry. The latter surprised Yonoko the most. She knew from Sesshōmaru’s former teachers that he had been a gifted writer and calligrapher during his boyhood, but she had rarely seen any of it. Tōga had always been the one to show interest in Sesshōmaru’s education, and therefore, she spoke to him after receiving this news from the maids. But Tōga merely told her not to worry.

As Rin gave Tōga her answer to his proposal, he knew the moment she entered his chamber that the answer would be a negative one. It did not surprise him that Rin had chosen not to become his official mistress, and although he was sure that Sesshōmaru’s return had something to do with it, he could not blame Rin for coming to this decision. Deep down, he had always known that she would never completely defy the code she had grown up with. And therefore, as he held her warm, soft body close to his own that night, he knew that their liaison would sooner or later come to an end. He would miss her in his bed, but they would part as friends.

For Tōga, it was enough to see Rin smile these days whenever she spent an hour or two in the company of his son. This was how it was supposed to be – how it should have been from the very beginning. And therefore, he had no right to interfere with whatever it was that was now blossoming between his son and the woman that had not long ago been deemed unworthy of the attention of the man he had given her to.

Perhaps, Tōga thought, it was meant to be this way by the gods. Everything happened for a reason – that he had realised a long time ago.


	17. Yearning Souls

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there!  
> I told you that this wouldn't be an abandoned story, right? I'm trying my best to update my fics regularly these days, but life just gets in the way. And new fandoms, too. Are there any Yuri!!! On Ice fans among you? If yes, you know what I mean. Victor is my life at the moment. 
> 
> And so is Sesshomaru!  
> This chapter is shorter and darker than the others, but it is essential to the plot, believe me. 
> 
> Have fun!

“You are leaving?”

Sesshōmaru accepted the tea Rin had poured him with a quiet thankyou and took a small sip, allowing himself to enjoy the taste of it on his tongue for a moment before he swallowed it and returned his attention to the woman sitting before him. There was a gentle frown on her beautiful face, and he found that he hated to see her like this.

A woman like her should never have a reason to frown.

“I have to,” Sesshōmaru explained. “It is an order of my father that I go to investigate the matter personally. It is important for us to show our face every now and then, to remind these creatures of our authority.” He held the cup a little tighter as the frown did not disappear from her face. “I won’t be gone for too long, I assume. These things are usually dealt with rather quickly.” Maybe that would put her mind at ease.

But the frown did not disappear. Instead, Rin seemed as if she were thinking hard about something.

“His majesty has told me about the whole matter,” she said slowly, suddenly blushing. “Over a cup of tea with Lady Izayoi, that is,” she added quickly and met his gaze, not wanting him to think that she spent all of her time in the Emperor’s bed. “I hope that it can be resolved.”

“I agree,” Sesshōmaru said, ignoring her blush on purpose, not wanting to embarrass her. “And I am glad that at least someone thinks this way.”

“Why?” Rin asked, raising an eyebrow. “Who disagrees with you?”

“Kagura does,” Sesshōmaru muttered, taking another sip from the tea. “She asked me to refuse.”

“Only because she misses you when you are gone, Mylord,” Rin said and shifted on her cushion as the cat that used to follow her around approached her and curled up on her lap with a soft meow, purring in content as Rin began to scratch her behind the ear. “Lady Kagura’s mood has improved greatly since your return. She loves you very much.”

Sesshōmaru ran a hand through his hair with a deep sigh. “I doubt that this is love,” he said, watching the cat stretch out on Rin’s lap. “For you see, yōkai-“

“-do hardly love,” Rin said, finishing the sentence for him. “I know. I’ve done my research in his majesty’s library. But Kagura has feelings for you, whether you like that or not.”

“I never denied that she might have feelings for me,” Sesshōmaru replied, admiring Rin for her ability to give those witty remarks. “But they are not love in a human sense of the word. Certainly not. Yōkai have different motivations for taking a liking to someone. Kagura’s motivation is her desire to have a child, to give me an heir.”

“Is that such a bad motivation?” Rin inquired.

“Of course not. But it is tedious.”

“It is tedious for her, too,” Rin reminded him. “Especially because she knows that she is partly responsible for it, for she is a wind sorceress and not a dog yōkai like you.”

Sesshōmaru laughed. “My dear Lady Rin, you truly have done your research properly,” he praised.

“I merely listen well,” Rin replied and clasped her small hands on her lap, the perfect lady. One would have never thought that not long ago, she had been nothing but a slave. “But regardless of her motivation, I think that her feelings for you are nothing but genuine. She always looks so happy when she is in your company.”

“You look happy, too.”

The words had come out of his mouth before he had even realised what he was saying. Mortified, he looked at Rin, who had begun to blush a little.

How he longed to touch those cheeks.

It was a thought he pushed aside immediately, reminding himself of their relationship.

“I am,” Rin said, and a smile spread across her face. “I like spending time with you, Mylord. You have a sharp mind. And I can learn so much from you. I like that.”

Never before had someone claimed to enjoy his presence just for what was in his mind. No, usually, people searched for his company because of his standing, because of the fact he was the crown prince and therefore heir to the throne.

No one ever wanted to be with him for his sake only.

Except Rin.

“There is very little that I can teach you, Lady Rin,” Sesshōmaru replied softly, cocking his head to the side. “I must say you are quite the learned woman.”

“In Aomori, that would be an insult,” Rin told him and laughed as he looked at her with wide eyes. “They do not like thinking women there. Or thinking slaves.”

“And yet, you managed to sharpen your mind,” Sesshōmaru said. They hardly spoke about her past, as he found it rude to ask her about it, and Rin never really brought it up. But every now and then, she would comment on something with a reference to her previous life. And each time that happened, Sesshōmaru would see a dark shadow in her beautiful brown eyes.

“I owe that to the woman that lived with me and my first master, I guess,” Rin said. “She was very intelligent and taught me many things.”

Sesshōmaru didn’t reply. Rin never spoke about her past. Rin never mentioned previous owners.

Why was she speaking about it now?

A knock on the door interrupted them, however, and a moment later, a young maid came in and bowed deeply.

“His majesty wishes to see you, your highness,” she said and bowed her head to Sesshōmaru.

Sesshōmaru nodded, cursing inwardly. Why did the gods have to destroy this moment?

“I will be with him immediately,” he said and the girl left again. He rose, and so did Rin.

“Will I see you once more before you leave, Mylord?” She asked, and she seemed to sound sad, even.

“I hope so,” Sesshōmaru said, clasping his hands behind his back. “I would very much like to finish this cup of tea with the West’s very own woman scholar.”

Rin chuckled and bowed. “It was a pleasure to have you here, Mylord,” she said. “I hope that you will return to us soon.”

Something inside him told him to stay, to pull this woman into his arms and promise her the world. But Sesshōmaru did no such thing. He suppressed the urge to disobey his father’s decree, and bowed instead. “Farewell, Lady Rin,” he said.

He was sure that it was silly to think so, but he was sure that he could feel his eyes on his back as he walked away, and out of the women’s shiro.

* * *

 

The Empress did not even try to hide the fact that she had taken a liking to Lady Rin. In fact, she was quite open about it. It had not taken long for the court to realise that she even seemed to favour her over Princess Kagura. But, of course, no one dared to say such a thing out loud.

And who could blame her? Wherever Lady Rin went, she was welcomed with open arms. Her charming personality, her gentleness as well as her intelligence and wit enchanted both men and women alike. Had she been a courtesan, she would have received countless offers every single day. But her station as Sesshōmaru’s secondary wife protected her from such advances – also because the people of the court had begun to notice that Prince Sesshōmaru had begun to actually see Lady Rin as his wife.

Some people claimed to have seen Lady Rin in the courtyard, weeping as Prince Sesshōmaru left once more and took to the skies in his true form.

It was, of course, merely a rumour. As he had left, Rin had stood beside Lady Izayoi, holding Prince Inuyasha in her arms, helping the little boy to wave at his brother.

It was an odd family constellation.

But in the world of yōkai, such things hardly mattered.

Therefore, the Empress found it not strange at all to enquire about her husband’s nightly activities by asking Lady Rin about them.

It was then that Empress Yonoko learnt that Lady Rin was no longer sharing the Emperor’s bed.

Sharing a cup of tea with him, yes, or exchange opinions about poetry. But they would no longer meet for a shared night of passion.

Which had brought Tōga back into Yonoko’s arms.

The Empress did not mind. If anything, she found his attempts at seducing her like he had once tried as a young man rather amusing. However, after a while, she declared openly during a feast that she hoped for Lady Izayoi to have many more children, and the message behind her words was clear to everyone, especially to Tōga. Yonoko valued her privacy, and had no intention of sleeping with Tōga whenever he was in the mood.

She was not Izayoi.

Tōga did not chide her for it.

Instead, Prince Hikaru was left in the care of his nursemaid during the nights, for his mother had taken up her marital duties again. Everyone could see how happy she was about that, and she would tell Rin about Tōga’s endeavours while blushing like a young girl. Immediately, she would apologise to Rin, who no longer got to enjoy the Emperor’s company, but Rin did not mind. She was happy for her friend and sister. And whilst she had enjoyed her time with Tōga, she found herself thinking of someone else at night. A man with golden eyes and hair as silver as the light of the moon. And a soul so deep and mysterious as the floating world of the kami.

* * *

 

The colours of nature had begun to change once more as Sesshōmaru fell from the sky.

At first, the people in the gardens had believed to be dreaming, or that their eyes were betraying them. But as the rain fell in red drops, staining their clothing and disgracing the petals, they lifted their gazes to the Heavens.

A large something had appeared above the palace, and as the people screamed, it turned into a sphere of light and fell from the sky. Just as it was merely meters above the ground, it burst, and the wrecked, maltreated body of their prince fell from the sky and onto the grass.

The screams of the courtiers had been heard throughout the palace.

The cries of Kagura, fighting like a lioness as she tried to get past the guards that surrounded the lifeless body of her husband. The silent terror of the Empress, who could not stop staring at her son. The howling of the Emperor, and the sound of tearing garments as he grabbed his son, screaming for a healer, damning the ones responsible for the tragedy.

No one saw Lady Rin, and the tears that streamed down her pale face as she wordlessly came closer and recognised the wounds on Sesshōmaru’s body. An entire arm was missing, and the poison eating at his remaining flesh.

Izayoi tried to pull her away, but Rin did not move.

She had seen these kinds of wounds before, in a life she had been trying to forget.

Kenshin was the first one to react, to notice Rin, and the sign of realisation in her eyes. Grabbing her by her shoulders, he shook her hard, and Rin told him in horror everything that she knew, unable to take her eyes off the man on the floor.

There would be no guarantee of survival, she heard the healers whisper as they carried Sesshōmaru to his rooms to take care of the wounds, to save what was left of him. Kagura’s lament never ceased, her cries echoing through the palace as she begged the kami to spare her husband, leaning against Izayoi for support. Rin merely watched. She never took her eyes of Sesshōmaru, not even as the healers cut into his flesh, cutting away what was eating at him, as it was the only way to save him. But there was no guarantee that he would live, for the poison was also in his blood – and only time would tell if Sesshōmaru was strong enough. After barely making it back to the palace in this state, he was very, very weak.

Days and nights passed without Sesshōmaru ever stirring, his breath uneven and shallow. They would never leave his side. Tōga would sit at the futon for hours without end, looking down at his son wordlessly. Izayoi would sit at his side, holding his hand and giving him the warmth that he needed. Yonoko would even go so far as to touch his cheek, only to flinch away after a second only at the cold feeling of his skin. Kagura would hold his hand firmly in hers, whispering to him, begging him to wake up, to fight against the poison.

Rin, however, would always remain quiet.

And even at times when everyone else had reluctantly gone to bed, she would sit at his side, making sure he was comfortable, and silent tears would roll down her cheeks as she asked the kami to grant her only this one wish.

Just this once, she allowed herself to be selfish, and asked them to save him for her sake.

For there was only one person that she could tell who she was, and what she had lived through, and what was about to come. Sesshōmaru was kind, kinder than most people thought.

Sesshōmaru would understand.

But the daiyōkai’s eyes remained shut, and his ragged, uneven breath sounded like a requiem.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what you think!
> 
> Also, if you like story (or any of my InuYasha stories), then I can highly recommend "Songbird" by MissMarquin. She's a dear friend of mine (literally, she is my Texan half and our brains are connected) and a fantastic author. In fact, she's one of my favourite authors on this site and I was so happy when senpai noticed me all those months ago. Go and check out her work!


	18. A Demon's Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whee! A new chapter!  
> Today it just... went really well, so I thought I might as well post it straight away.
> 
> I love these two <3

Yōkai did not have fever dreams.

But to Sesshōmaru, it had to be one. There was no other explanation than that. Only a dream could explain why he was lying in his bed at the Western palace and not in the middle of the woods. Was he dead already? Or had the kami decided to play with his mind once more, trying to trick him into believing that all was well, that he had not been attacked and badly wounded?

Only a dream could explain the sleeping figure on the floor next to him. Her dark hair pooled around her head like a silken fan, her chest rising and falling evenly. But her hand, her little, tender hand, rested on his chest, right above his heart, as if to keep him safe.

Sesshōmaru realised then that he was alive.

He tried to lift his arm, to take away her hand, only to realise that his limbs did not obey him anymore. Only then he remembered what had happened, and that his arm was gone. It would forever be a proof of his failure.

And so, he raised the arm that had remained, trying to push her hand away from his chest. But the moment he touched her skin, Rin awoke with a gasp and sat up, her eyes wide and fearful as she looked at him in dismay. She was pale, paler than she had been the day he had met her for the first time. Her face was haggard, as if she had not been eating and sleeping properly for days, and her hand was clutching his as if she were afraid of ever letting go again.

Sesshōmaru did not have the heart to do so.

For a long moment, neither Rin nor Sesshōmaru said a word. Instead, Rin burst into tears and wrapped her arms around him, burying her face in his chest as she cried. Sesshōmaru froze, terrified of hurting her, but then he realised that the girl was crying tears of joy, and that what she was murmuring under her breath were prayers of gratefulness towards the gods.

How long had he been unconscious?

But Sesshōmaru did not withdraw from her embrace. Instead, he put his arm around her, and allowed himself to inhale her scent that he had longed for every night that he had been away. He had not admitted it to himself until now, that he had missed her. That at night, when he had been alone, he had not thought of his mission, or of ways to gain more power. The only thing on his mind had been Rin. Her voice, her smile, the sparkle in her eyes. Her witty remarks, and her dry comebacks.

And now she lay in his embrace, crying, and thanking the kami for his survival.

“Rin,” Sesshōmaru whispered, running his hair over her hair. “Look at me.”

To his surprise, she heard him, and she raised her head. Her eyes were red from crying, but full of bliss.

“How long?” He asked.

“Forty-two days,” she whispered. “You were asleep for forty-two days.”

Sesshōmaru let out a breathless laugh. “Oh. I see.”

“The healers tried everything they could to wake you, but when they…” Rin swallowed thickly, sitting up again. “They… they had to…”

“I know,” Sesshōmaru murmured. He could worry about the loss of his arm later. Other things were far more important than that.

It was just an arm.

So he told himself for now.

Rin shifted beside him, her fingers curling up around his hand.

“I thought you would die,” she whispered, looking away, as if she were ashamed of admitting it. “We… we prayed day and night. The monks hardly took a break. Tōga- I mean, the emperor… he… he is barely able to function these days. And Kagura… she barely leaves her rooms…”

“But you are here,” Sesshōmaru said softly. “You… you slept here.”

Rin blushed. “I… I could not get myself to… to leave you alone at night,” she murmured. “I was so afraid that something would happen if I left the room and I-“

Sesshōmaru brought her hand to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss to it.

Rin trailed off, looking at him with wide eyes, like a deer, running away from its hunter. But Rin did not move.

“I feel terrible,” Sesshōmaru said quietly. “But it is comforting to know that you stayed at my side, Rin.”

She swallowed thickly, the blush spreading across her cheeks.

“But please do me a favour,” he said. “Can you do that?”

She nodded wordlessly.

“Go to my father and tell him that I need to see him. And then go to sleep. You need it,” he added when she opened her mouth to protest. “Please. Take it as an order from your husband.”

Rin shut her mouth immediately, and much to his surprise, she got up without another word of protest. Her hand lingered on his the longest, only breaking away as Sesshōmaru withdrew it from her. Now that she was standing, Sesshōmaru could take a proper look at her. Although she was pale, she was still the beauty she had been the day he had left. And even now she carried herself with a certain elegance that only a selected few possessed.

“I will be here when you come back,” he said. “Thank you, Rin.”

She smiled at him once more before she left, leaving him behind in the darkness of the room.

******

The news that the crown prince had woken from his fever had spread through the palace like wildfire, and by the time the sun was rising, everyone knew. Tōga had left his bedchamber the moment he had received the news from Rin, rushing to see his son. Even Yonoko, who had never acted as a loving mother towards her son, had immediately gone to see him. Kagura had cried tears of joy as she had thrown herself into his arms, thanking the kami for having mercy. A feast would be thrown in order to celebrate Sesshōmaru’s recovery, and although Rin was happy, she was not in the mood for a celebration.

These days, she was too lost in her thoughts to think of anything else but Sesshōmaru.

For he had called himself her husband, and for the first time, it had sounded as if it meant something to him. And the mere thought of him saying those words sent shivers down her spine, and filled her with outmost happiness.

At the same time, Rin knew that none of this was meant to be. She saw the reminder of it every single day, the clear message of the gods telling her that they would never be one.

She tried to distract herself by taking care of him in the best possible way. The attack had left its marks on not only his body but also on his soul, and Sesshōmaru would sleep for days without end. Rin did not know that he was often awake at night, and that he would watch her sleep on the floor beside him.

It was a sight that a certain someone did not like at all, and that was Kagura. Sesshōmaru had asked her to calm down the moment she had rushed into the room to see him, and although he had no ill feelings towards her, he could not help but regard her presence in the room as a disturbance. He hated to admit it, but he did not like it when Kagura and Rin were in the same room. Whenever Kagura came in, Rin would literally shrink on her cushion and remain awfully quiet until the other woman was gone again. Kagura, of course, was entirely unaware of the effect she had on the other woman. She only had eyes for Sesshōmaru, and failed to interpret the icy atmosphere in the room correctly.

And yet, Sesshōmaru never snapped at his first wife, not even once.

He knew better than that.

What surprised him the most was the fact that Rin seemed to see right through him.

He had his eyes closed, his head resting on a fresh cushion as he heard the door slip open and Kagura came in, her steps pausing in the doorframe.

“Is he asleep?” He heard her ask.

“Yes, Mylady,” Rin replied respectfully from her seat by the alcove where she was busy preparing the tea that the healers had prescribed. “He has been sleeping for many hours. It is the tea.”

Sesshōmaru heard Kagura huff in annoyance. “Send word to me once he wakes up, will you?”

The doors were closed again, and Sesshōmaru let out an inaudible sigh. It was not that he despised Kagura.

But he was not in the mood to see her.

“You do realise that she will eventually shake you awake?”

Sesshōmaru smirked.

Oh, his clever Rin.

“That may be true,” Sesshōmaru murmured and lifted his hand to rub his face. “But I must admit that I see myself unable to face her at the moment.”

He heard the rustling of silk on tatami mats, and as he opened his eyes, he found Rin taking a seat next to him. Beside her stood a small basket with clean bandages. Sesshōmaru frowned, watching her as she reached for what was left of his arm and pulled away instinctively.

Rin froze.

“Let a healer take care of that,” Sesshōmaru murmured, looking away from her as he pushed himself up into a sitting position, promptly regretting it. The tea they forced him to drink to speed up the healing process was making him feel dizzy and tired.

“I can do it,” Rin said. “I have done it many times already when you were-“

“I know that,” Sesshōmaru replied, sounding harsher than he had thought. He regretted it instantly. “But it doesn’t mean that you have to do it. Such tasks are beneath you.”

Now that was something that he definitely should not have said. He received the slap in return instantly.

“I think it is still _I_ who decides what tasks are beneath me, Mylord,” Rin said with a frown.

“You may see this as an honourable duty, Lady Rin, but believe me, it is not,” Sesshōmaru told her, looking at her for a brief moment only.

Rin opened her mouth to throw an annoyed reply at him, but much to Sesshōmaru’s surprise, she chose to remain silent. Instead, she clasped her hands on her lap, and Sesshōmaru reached for the cup of water beside his futon. It was tasteless, but at least better than the bitter tea that they had been forcing down his throat for days.

“Do you think yourself to be an obscenity to look at, Mylord?”

Sesshōmaru almost choked on his drink.

Coughing, he put the cup down and turned his head to look at Rin, who was studying him with an expression on her face that he found hard to identify. It was neither anger nor pity. It was something new, something that he had, however, seen on Lady Izayoi before.

Was it sympathy?

“Because if you do, you are mistaken,” Rin said. Her voice was calm and gentle, but there was a firmness in her voice that did not allow any objections. “The loss of an arm is nothing compared to the life you keep, and-“

“You do not understand,” Sesshōmaru interrupted her quietly.

Rin fell silent.

It was true that he had to consider himself lucky that he had not died. That the kami had had mercy with him once more – with him, of all people, with someone who had laughed in their faces so many times, who had ridiculed them on countless occasions.

They had saved his life, yet taken his arm.

They let him live, yet took away a part of his strength.

There was no greater shame.

“Indeed, I do not,” Rin said quietly. “I cannot imagine what it must be like to… to lose a limb. Or what it means for a yōkai.”

There she was again, the incredible Rin, and her insight into both human and yōkai nature. She claimed not to understand them, but Sesshōmaru knew better. If there was any other human besides Izayoi who knew about yōkai and their hearts, then it was Rin. She had learnt to read him, and he could not fool her.

He did not even want to.

“But it does not change the worth that you have to me,” Rin continued. “Or the worth that you have to your family. Otherwise your father would not come here to see you when you are sleeping. The men of this family are all a bit strange when it comes to emotions, it seems,” she added and then began to remove the bandages from his arm as if he had not told her to not do it. “I just hope that your brothers won’t turn out this way.”

She removed the bandages completely and Sesshōmaru shut his eyes, not wanting to look at the destroyed flesh attached to his shoulder. But Rin did not even blink twice as she applied the ointment and wrapped fresh bandages around it once more.

Sesshōmaru had to admit that Rin touching him was a soothing experience.

*****

From that moment on, he let Rin change his bandages without protest.

Nonetheless, he pretended to be asleep whenever Kagura came in. Rin, however, would not comment on it anymore. She had understood that Sesshōmaru had his reasons, and that in his current state of self-doubt and small outburst of anger, Kagura was indeed not the best choice of company.

But whenever Rin was with him, he was gentle and almost quiet.

“Where did you learn to do these things?” Sesshōmaru asked her one evening as she changed his bandages once more. He was not looking at her, not able to look at his destroyed flesh yet. Rin had never commented on that, and for that he was incredibly grateful.

“Changing bandages?” She asked.

“No, I mean…” Sesshōmaru rubbed his eyes. “Taking care of injuries.”

For a long moment, Rin was quiet as she worked, and Sesshōmaru began to believe that this was something she did not want to answer.

But then, she spoke.

“My first master was a healer,” Rin said quietly as she reached into the basket and pulled out another clean strip of cloth. “We often helped him. The woman that lived there, and I. He taught us these things. It is the first thing I remember doing. Cutting cloth into strips for bandages.”

Carefully, she put some ointment on the cloth before pressing it against the still healing wound.

“That woman,” Sesshōmaru murmured. “You mentioned her before. You said she was the one who taught you reading and writing.”

“Yes,” Rin confirmed. “She was a slave, like me. But we were never treated badly by our master. He was kind. Very kind, even. He… he never treated us like actual slaves. His son did not like that. In his eyes, we were nothing but filth. Unworthy of… decent treatment.”

Rin rarely spoke of her past, and Sesshōmaru knew that it was wiser not to interrupt Rin until she finished talking or changed the subject on her own. But he could not deny that he was intrigued. He wanted to know Rin better, wanted to know of her past.

“But our master would never listen to his son, and always treat us well. I remember he even bought me a toy one day. Just something simple. I can’t remember what it was. But I know that I loved it… he died when I was… I don’t know. Five, or so.”

Sesshōmaru turned his head. Rin was still working on the bandages.

“His son wanted to get rid of us. Sell us. The woman… she must have known what was coming. She told me to climb into a wooden box, and she filled it with some kind of vegetables. But I was scared and ran away in the middle of the night. The guards caught me and… and they took me back there. But my new master kept me separate from the woman that night and took me to the slave market the next day. I never saw her again.”

Rin had finished with the bandages and turned away to wash her hands in the bowl of water that stood by the window.

“Now that I think about it, I believe she was my mother,” Rin murmured. “And that my first master was my father. It explains why his son was so… angry and disgusted each time he saw us. In Aomori, even women can inherit from their fathers. Including the children with enslaved mothers. Maybe he was worried that I would inherit something. Or that the council would force him to set us free.” She dried her hands with a small towel that lay next to the bowl, looking out of the window and up at the moon.

“I’ve been to Aomori,” Sesshōmaru said after a while. “What I saw there unsettled me greatly.”

Rin looked at him, her expression unreadable. “What unsettles you used to be my reality,” she said. “I don’t know why the kami have sent me here, but-“

“They sent you here because you deserve freedom,” Sesshōmaru interrupted her, instinctively reaching out for her.

“Maybe,” Rin murmured, clasping her hands on her lap, the way she always did. And each time, she looked like a queen to Sesshōmaru. Nothing reminded of the slave girl that she had once been. “Freedom is one thing. But now that I have it, I am more confused than ever before.”

“Confused?” Sesshōmaru didn’t understand. There was no reason for Rin to be confused, was there? It was all clear as day. She had her freedom, she had endless wealth, she had protection. She had the best life that a woman could have. That a human could have.

“It may sound silly to you,” Rin murmured. “But as a slave, I knew where my place was, and to whom I belonged. What was expected of me. Now, I feel as if I’m floating and with every day that passes it becomes worse.”

Sesshōmaru had put his hand on top of Rin’s, his palm large enough to cover both of her hands. She stopped talking as he touched her. For it was something that he never did. She looked up at him, meeting his gaze, finding sympathy and a fire in them that she had never seen before.

“You belong to me,” Sesshōmaru said, his voice strangely hoarse as he spoke. “We may not have become husband and wife in the usual way, but you cannot deny that our friendship has developed into a deep bond. Deeper than the one that I have with Kagura. I beg you, Rin.” He grasped her hands firmly. “Do not doubt that you have a place with me. And that my affection for you is genuine.”

For a moment, Sesshōmaru believed that Rin would lean into him.

She lifted her gaze, meeting his eyes in a way that he had never seen on her before. As if it was painful for her to look him in the eye.

“You should not say such things, Mylord,” Rin said, and she sounded so incredibly sad that it broke Sesshōmaru’s heart. “For you might regret them.”

“Why?” Sesshōmaru whispered. “Why should I regret admitting that my wife matters to me?”

“Because I am carrying a child that is not yours, Mylord.”

Rin withdrew her hands from his grasp and rose, in the elegant way of an empress, absentmindedly touching her stomach.

Sesshōmaru knew nothing to say.

Rin picked up the now empty basket and went to the door, opening it carefully.

“I’m sorry”, she whispered.

And with that, she was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry.


	19. To Bid Him Farewell

Rin did not come again that day. Instead, it was a maid that brought him dinner and changed his bandages. Right after that, Kagura came to see him, and this time, he could not pretend to be asleep. However, he could not pretend to be happy to see her either. He found her voice too loud, too shrill, her words too much and their substance too little. Everything she said was nothing but a lament, followed by a praise of the gods for saving him. Only as Sesshōmaru firmly told her that he wished to sleep, she stopped talking and took her leave. The moment the doors closed behind her, Sesshōmaru let out a deep sigh. The silence was comforting, but it was not enough to stop the storm in his mind.

There were very few things that could unsettle Sesshōmaru. Most of the time, he presented a stoic, cold demeanour to the world, and it was an appropriate representation of his mind. But each time something managed to cut deep into him, to pierce right into his soul and through his heart, he found himself helpless and unsure of what to do. A yōkai like him was not supposed to feel deeply. And yet he did.

The first time he had loved, he had been a child only. Shizue had been everything to him, his beloved nursemaid. She had played with him, held him, soothed him, fought with him. And then, as he had been on the very brink to adulthood, the kami had taken her away from him. He had been old enough to understand the concept of death, but he had been too young to cope with loss.

There had been no one around to guide him. For the one who had usually done so had been no more.

Since then, Sesshōmaru had never loved again.

And now, he loved a second time, but the kami had chosen to interfere in the cruellest way.

He loved Rin.

There was no way of denying it.

Sesshōmaru was sure that Rin, even if she did not love him in return, had at least feelings for him. Feelings, yes, that was already enough. Knowing that she liked him for his own sake, for the person that he was and not for the fact that he was a prince – it was more than enough. He had never known that this was everything he had ever wanted. Appreciation of who he was.

Now, he could finally understand what his father saw in the Lady Izayoi.

His father, who had given Rin the appreciation and kindness that Sesshōmaru had been lacking so far. His father, who would take and take and take without batting an eye. His father, who had given him this woman, this wonderful woman, only to watch his son fail and pick up the pieces that Sesshōmaru had left behind.

It was his fault that Rin had felt drawn to the emperor in the first place. And now, despite trying to make up for the terrible things he had said and done, the kami chose to hurt him once more.

Perhaps, Sesshōmaru thought, perhaps it was a test.

Perhaps it was the kami’s way of offering him a way to prove himself. To show that he was serious, that his feelings for Rin were genuine. That he loved her, and respected her.

It all came down to respect.

Respect meant acknowledging Rin as a person with a free will. She had not been forced to share Tōga’s bed – she had done so voluntarily. He did not own her. Then who was he to judge?

The truth was that it was not his place to judge at all.

Perhaps loving someone meant to respect someone’s choices even if one did not approve of them.

Sesshōmaru knew very little of love. But he knew that he did not want to lose another chance of finding it.

*******

Two days after his last conversation with Rin, his father came to see him.

Sesshōmaru had been allowed to leave the bed for good, but to take it easy for a little longer. It felt good to wear his own clothes again, and to wander the gardens in blissful solitude that gave him the freedom to think. He felt his father’s presence before he could see him, but Sesshōmaru made no attempt of turning around to him. Not until he had finished his current train of thought.

Tōga was patient, watching his son in silence and giving him the time that he needed. As Sesshōmaru finally turned around to face him, he greeted him with a nod. “Chichiue.”

Tōga nodded in return. “You look better,” he said. “The healers told me that you were here.”

Sesshōmaru did not reply, averting his gaze instead.

“This was Shizue’s favourite place, was it not?” Tōga asked, coming a little closer. “I remember that you often spend the afternoons here with her. You liked chasing the ducks.”

Sesshōmaru’s heart ached in his chest. It always did so whenever Shizue’s name was mentioned.

“Why are you here, Chichiue,” he asked. “Certainly not to tell me of my childhood.”

Tōga clasped his hands behind his back, watching Sesshōmaru with a pained expression on his face. “I came to ask of your forgiveness for Lady Rin.”

Sesshōmaru stared at him. “What should there be to forgive. She has done nothing wrong.”

His reply seemed to surprise the emperor, for Tōga seemed at loss for words for the first time in Sesshōmaru’s presence. But Sesshōmaru did not wait for his father to speak again.

“I know of your history with her and I do not judge her for it. She may be my wife but not my property.”

The times of Rin being someone else’s property were gone, and he would not allow them to repeat themselves in a different form.

“I only wonder how it was possible,” Sesshōmaru murmured.

Tōga shifted awkwardly from one foot to the other. “We thought the… the tea would work,” he said. “But it apparently only works for demonesses. Izayoi never needed it, otherwise we would have known that it was useless.” He crossed his arms with a sigh. “It was not planned, my son. I would have never dared to insult your person in such a crass way.”

“I am not insulted, Chichiue,” Sesshōmaru said a little louder than he had intended. “As I said: I do not own Lady Rin. She may be my wife, but she makes her own choices.”

Tōga said nothing to that, clasping his hands behind his back once more as he watched Sesshōmaru bend down and pick up the dead bird he had found there earlier. Tenseiga began to pulsate at his waist, and Tōga wondered if Sesshōmaru would react to it. And then, Sesshōmaru tossed the bird high in the air and pulled out the sword, slicing through the little animal as it fell. A second later, the bird began to chirp again and flew off, bumping promptly into a tree, as if it couldn’t quite believe that it was still alive.

“I have never seen you use it before,” Tōga remarked. “I thought you were unhappy with it.”

“I said the sword was useless, Chichiue,” Sesshōmaru replied, putting it back into its sheath. “Not that I was unhappy with it.”

“Well, to be fair, knowing you I assumed that useless equals unhappy,” Tōga said. “You called Lady Rin useless once.”

“Do I look like she makes me unhappy?” Sesshōmaru asked sharply, turning around to look at his sire. Oh, how he hated their debates, and how his father always tried to outsmart him, how he always tried to trick him into certain answers, to certain revelations.

Tōga smiled lightly. “No. You don’t,” he said softly and walked past Sesshōmaru towards the small pond. A group of ducks had gathered at the shore, bathing in the sunlight.

“I will finish what you have asked of me, Chichiue,” Sesshōmaru said after a while. “I will return to the North and-“

“You want to leave again?” Tōga turned around, the surprise clear on his face. “Sesshōmaru, you don’t have to. Not after-“

“My injury does not weaken me,” Sesshōmaru said firmly. “I will finish what I have begun in the name of our empire.”

“I never said that it would,” Tōga replied. “But you have not one, but two wives now that need your attention, and one of them is with child, even.”

“Lady Kagura is perfectly capable of looking after herself,” Sesshōmaru huffed. “And Lady Rin is well cared for and looked after. Perhaps my sentiments would be different if the child was mine, Chichiue, but we both know that I am not a man of _emotion_.”

Tōga frowned. “You cannot punish Lady Rin like this for-“

“I never said I-”

“Do not interrupt me, son!” Tōga barked, and the birds fled from the trees around them in sheer excitement. Sesshōmaru stopped talking immediately, looking at his father almost challengingly. “Do not punish Lady Rin with ignorance because of what you can or cannot feel.”

“She is the one who has stopped visiting.”

“Because she is feeling unwell due to the pregnancy,” Tōga replied sharply. Sesshōmaru seemed surprised. “Yes. Human women suffer from side effects. You would know that if you had bothered to ask her. Or if you had ever visited Lady Izayoi in the early stages of her pregnancies, as appropriate.”

And with that, Tōga turned around and walked away from Sesshōmaru towards the patio, ending their conversation. Sesshōmaru remained silent. He had no right to speak up again. Tōga might have been his father, but he was also the emperor. And these days, it became very clear to him that Tōga was never just the one or just the other.

He was always both.

“At least have the decency to speak to her once more before you leave,” Tōga muttered. “And do not forget that you have another wife as well.”

Sesshōmaru inclined his head to him, only lifting it again as he could be sure that his father was gone.

******

A little sickness had to be expected, Lady Izayoi had said.

Rin, however, had not expected to feel so terrible for three days in a row. The healers had been promptly consulted, and they had prepared herbs and teas for her to consume in order to bring her at least some relief. But Rin found that lying down and sleeping seemed to help best. If anything, they helped her to forget that she was pregnant, but in love with a man that was not the father.

Rin was not ashamed to admit that she loved Sesshōmaru. Somehow, somewhere, she had begun to see through his cold façade, and had gotten to know the real man. The real prince, the one with a kind heart and a great sense of humour.

If only the child she carried was not his father’s.

For it was clear to her now that the child that she carried, despite loving it dearly already, was the reason Sesshōmaru would never love her in return. He had said the most beautiful things, but they did not matter anymore. How could he love her, after such a revelation, after breaking their bond like this?

Perhaps it was for the best, Rin thought as she touched her stomach absentmindedly, staring at the ceiling. Perhaps this was divine intervention, a clear sign that they were not meant to be, and that it was best if she just stopped dreaming about such silly things like a happy marriage.

After all, she had never been meant for a life like this.

Her maid came in, kneeling by the door and bowing her head respectfully. Rin would never get used to that sight. It was supposed to be the other way round. She had always been the one to bow to others, to serve them.

“Mylady, his Imperial Highness, Prince Sesshōmaru, has come to see you,” she said softly.

Rin frowned a little. Technically, there was nothing that could stop Sesshōmaru from simply entering these rooms. He was, after all, her husband. But he had apparently chosen to wait for her approval instead. Rin was not sure what to think of that.

“He should be resting,” Rin murmured to herself.

“I believe it is important, Mylady,” the maid remarked. “He… he is wearing his armour.”

At that, Rin looked up, frowning at the maid.

Why was he wearing his armour?

“Let him in,” she said, sitting up properly and adjusting her kimono as she waited for his arrival. She would have recognised the sound of his footsteps everywhere. Light, yet determined, a man on a mission wherever he went. Only right in front of her door he seemed to stop, pausing in the doorframe.

Neither of them spoke for a long moment.

“May I come in, Lady Rin?”

Rin looked up at him, her eyes wandering over his white clothing and the armour that covered his chest, shoulders, and part of his legs. His swords were attached to it as well, right where his arm was supposed to be. The sleeve was empty, moving slightly whenever he turned, yet hiding that he was no longer in one piece.

To Rin, it would never be a flaw.

As she nodded, he entered her room, moving to sit down beside her futon, keeping a respectful distance between them. His eyes wandered over her pale face down to her hands that were still touching her stomach. But under the many layers of her kimono, her pregnancy was not visible. Only her scent gave her away. It was stronger, intoxicating, even.

Under ordinary circumstances, Sesshōmaru would have been happy about it.

But now, it was just a painful reminder of his own failure. And his father’s triumph.

“How are you feeling?” Sesshōmaru asked, his voice surprisingly calm and gentle. “I have been informed that you have not been feeling too well recently because of your pregnancy.”

Rin swallowed thickly. He said it as if it were nothing. As if she had not betrayed him in the most horrible way a wife ever could.

“I’m better,” Rin murmured. “The healers have given me tea.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” Sesshōmaru said, looking at the empty cup on the tray next to the futon. “Do not hesitate to ask them for help. Our healers are the best in the country, and at your disposal.”

“I will,” Rin said softly. “Thank you.”

It was quiet between them for a long moment, neither of them knowing how to proceed, or if they should say anything at all. In the end, it was Sesshōmaru who broke the silence, and what he said was the last thing that Rin expected from him.

“I will leave today to finish the task my father gave me,” Sesshōmaru said. “But I did not want to leave without telling you about my affections, and that my feelings for you remain unchanged, Lady Rin.” He said it so easily, so lightly, as if he had been talking about his emotions to her many times before, and Rin looked at him with wide eyes, her heart beating rapidly in her chest. “I still believe that perhaps it was fate that brought you to this place. We will never know. But you are my wife, and as your husband, it is my duty to protect you from dishonour and defamation.”

Sesshōmaru took a deep breath, as if he were mentally preparing herself for the following words.

“The child may not be mine, but I will treat it as if it were,” he said, looking Rin in the eye. “What you treasure shall be treasured by me, and what is yours will be protected by me. Even if it is a child that is not mine.”

Of all the things that Rin had expected to hear from him in that moment, this had certainly not been one of them. She had expected him to deliver a few well-prepared words and then take his leave. Not to repeat what had been already said. Not to stress the honesty behind them.

Rin looked away from him.

A long time ago, she would have never dared to dream of a life like the one she had now. She really had it all. A home, a husband, even a child growing in her belly. It all could have been so easy, so wonderful.

“You should not say things you cannot mean.”

“Why do you doubt the gods, Rin?” Sesshōmaru’s voice was near, so very near. He had reached out for her, but grasping at nothing but thin air, keeping a distance to her.

“You cannot be happy about this.”

“I never said I was. But I am not angry either. Not at you, at least.”

“This very situation is a mockery of who you are, Mylord,” Rin breathed, finally turning her head to face him again. “How can you say you have affections for the woman that carries your father’s child?”

“I don’t know,” Sesshōmaru almost snapped. “But all I know is that I do and neither you nor I can do anything to change that! And truth be told, I do not even want to. I have not felt as alive as I do now in decades, and I believe that the one I have to thank for that is sitting right in front of me, refusing to believe that she is deserving of my affections!”

“I? Not deserving your affections?” Rin repeated. “It is I who decides-“

“-what you deserve or not, exactly!” Sesshōmaru grabbed her hand, mindful of his claws as he gently wrapped his fingers around her delicate wrist. “Why can you not decide to deserve what I wish to give you, Rin? What I wish to give only to you? And to no other?”

Rin did not withdraw her hand from his gentle grip.

She was frozen, unable to move as the determination in his golden eyes shifted to outmost tenderness, and the man she had gotten to know over the course of the previous weeks and months returned.

“Why can you not believe me when I say that nothing has to change between us?” Sesshōmaru asked quietly.

Rin could not reply.

And Sesshōmaru understood.

He let go of her hand again and rose, the armour settling heavily on his chest and shoulders as he moved. “I do not need an answer now,” Sesshōmaru said, looking outside at the sky. “But it is time for me to leave. Allow me at least to hope for your blessing for a safe and swift return.”

And Rin granted him this hope gladly, from the bottom of her heart.


End file.
